Hi all, first time posting on here so please be gentle!
I am currently 40 weeks pregnant with my first baby (little girl)
I am so excited, but there is one thing on my mind.
I really dislike my father in law. He has some very medieval opinions on parenting, and a lot of opinions on pretty much everything with life that I mostly disagree with. He'd rude obnoxious and he's also a sponger in terms of money, but that's a story for another day! Anyway, the list would be to long, but to name a few of his quotes:
"A father shouldn't change a daughters nappy, its not right" well i'm sorry! But this got my back right up! My Fiance will most certainly be changing our daughters nappy, I actually asked him about this to make sure he was not in agreement with his dad on the matter and much to my delight... he wasn't! To be honest i'd be more likely to have my suspicions about him as to why he thinks this is so "weird" if it is your daughter then how on earth should this be weird?! The next quote was "you have to have more than one child, what if one dies" this boggled my mind and I could not even think of how to respond, not only how highly inappropriate it is to be speaking to a pregnant woman about the tragedy of children dying, but you don't have more children "in case one dies!!!" He was vaping around me and when asked to stop got threw a little strop and stayed in the kitchen sulking for ages to make a point, and always comes in smelling of beer! Luckily he lives a while a way so doesn't visit often!Anyway I could go on all day but don't want to make this a war and peace article! My point is, his last visit he left on very bad terms, he was kicked out basically when things came to ahead and my fiance told him its best he leaves. Now I am NOT someone to use a child as a weapon. But I do not want him around my baby, she is the most precious thing in my life and the thought of handing her over to someone like him to hold simply makes my skin crawl. (Someone please tell me if I am hugely over-reacting) now I don't want to upset my fiance, and he is very understanding, he isn't the biggest fan of his Dad himself and I am grateful of how very different he is from his father but he uses the term (he's my Dad though). Anyway I don't want him here, It will be so awkward for a start because the last I saw of him, he left on very bad terms, with me raising my voice to a suitable loud volume and giving him a few home truths (iv'e tried not to be stressed whilst being pregnant but he was pushing all my buttons and I exploded" it is inevitable that at some point he should want to meet his granddaughter but I am getting so worked up about the whole thing. What shall I do???!!!!