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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Baby on Board badge

34 replies

InDreamland · 08/06/2018 19:04

My baby on board badge came in the post today from Transport for London. Now I just need to pluck up the courage to wear it.

Was planning to just have it in my bag ready to pop on if I am having a bad day but sometimes the dizziness comes on when I'm on the train. Also worried I'll just get looks from people because at only 7 weeks I don't look pregnant yet.

Other thing worried about is bumping into people I know on the tube. I know so many people who live along the same line as me and it's not uncommon to bump into them. I don't want anyone to know until week 13 or 14..........apart from my parents and sister (FIL can wait longer and therefore will have to hold off on telling SIL).

For those in and around London, when did you start wearing yours? If you started wearing it before bump showed what reaction did you get? Did you start wearing it before telling colleagues and friends?

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chloechloe · 08/06/2018 19:17

If you're (understandably) worried about inadvertently announcing your pregnancy then I wouldn't bother with the badge. Any time you're feeling unwell just go and ask for a seat, saying your pregnant and not feeling well. Nobody will quiz you on how pregnant you are! I find it's easier just to direct the question to a group of commuters rather than singling anybody out. I never had to do it when pregnant but there were a few occasions when I was faced with a crying baby that wanted BFing on a train!

schoolworrier · 08/06/2018 19:20

I didn't really need mine tbh. Early on if I wanted to sit down I'd just go to one of the special seats and say "so sorry but I'm pregnant and I feel awful. Can I sit there please?" Sometimes the person was like but usually they (or a women in the car) would leap straight up... sometimes multiple people! Once you're showing badge is not really needed imo. But I looked like a whale very clearly pregnant for early on.

schoolworrier · 08/06/2018 19:22

Exactly @chloechloe! funnily enough I've had people refuse to get up for me when bf DCs on the tube (and had to do it standing) but when pregnant I didn't have any probs getting a seat.

TinyTerror1 · 08/06/2018 19:46

I'm in Birmingham and they've just launched this scheme. I've requested a badge but not sure I'll ever wear it! But then I rarely get on a bus when there aren't any seats. It's an interesting idea though.

user1484167681 · 08/06/2018 19:49

I started wearing mine once I was happy for a friend or acquaintance to know, if I bumped into them. It was handy, especially when I was so tired but not showing in the early stages, or when my big winter coat hid my bump.

kirinm · 08/06/2018 21:05

I started wearing mine at about 18 weeks
(But took it off before I got into work). I am nearly 28 weeks now and still get ignored at least a couple of times a week. 🙄

Baby2018 · 08/06/2018 21:13

I wear mine, it makes me feel better about not being jostled around on the train although got to say it makes very little difference. Ive never been offered a seat. At 24 weeks when you have your mat B1 you can ask the train company ( most of them anyway) for a slip that allows you to sit in first class if there are no seats in standard just so you know.

Original poster

InDreamland · 08/06/2018 23:10

Thanks ladies. Unfortunately I'm never brave enough to ask for a seat. The other day I was so tired and lightheaded, managed to get a seat, the priority seat on the end and a pregnant lady with a badge got on. Noone offered her a seat. I felt terrible not getting up given she is clearly further along than me and I was still without a badge but if I did I would have just ended up in someone's lap. I just don't have the confidence to say anything if I need a seat because I am not confident it would be a positive response and that other girl is clearly the same otherwise she'd have asked.

OP posts:

rainbowpony · 08/06/2018 23:53

Just ask if you need a seat - for any reason, simple. People just don't look up from their phones to notice badges.

And don't feel bad that someone was noticeably further along, I felt worse when I didn't show - that's when I needed a seat. In the last couple of weeks, when huge, people offered a seat but by then I personally founded it more comfortable on my feet!

laurG · 09/06/2018 10:32

I started wearing it about 7 weeks. I didn’t have a choice tbh. I couldn’t handle the tube. Was so nauseous and dizzy I kept having to get off because I started to pass out. It was actually quite dangerous. I looked so Ill people actually offered me a seat without the badge. Probably though I had a hangover! I got to the point I really didn’t care if I saw anyone. If you do see someone maybe just asked them to keep it to themselves. I used to take mine off as soon as I got on the escalator out of the tube.

I found people a bit reluctant to give me s seat In those early days. This was annoying as that’s when I needed it the most. I’m now 36 weeks and actually prefer standing. I don’t wear the badge but people do very kindly offer me s seat on every journey.

I think the scheme is amazing. People can be rude about it but it was a total lifesaver for me.

Oct18mummy · 09/06/2018 18:22

I started wearing mine after I told my work as have some people that do the same journey and didn’t want to bump into them 😬 I had horrendous morning sickness and don’t know how I got through 12 weeks not sitting down. Makes such a difference getting a seat, I’m 19 weeks now and you have to be vocal and ask for a seat even though I’m showing and clearly pregnant. Majority of people have been amazing however you do get people that just ignore you. Wear it and be vocal x

happymummy12345 · 09/06/2018 19:31

I moved back to London when I was 7 months pregnant (I'm from there, but moved up north, but was persuaded to move back so my family were nearby when I had the baby. Anyway I digress totally). I never had one, nor did I ever ask anyone to stand up for me. In fact I was past my due date and I stood on the overground. The badges are tacky and awful, I hate them and would never ever have worn one. Pure attention seeking.

kirinm · 09/06/2018 19:46

Good for you @happymummy12345 but as someone who does wear one, I don't feel like I'm attention seeking. I wouldn't mind a seat and sometimes I get offered one, sometimes I don't. It's just fucking polite to offer someone heavily pregnant a seat. Like it would be to an elderly or disabled person.

BlueBug45 · 09/06/2018 19:58

@happymummy12345 the badges are so people can work out whether you are pregnant rather than just fat.

I've looked pregnant from 16 weeks and never had problems getting a seat on the tube, train or overground but some women don't look pregnant that early on.

Also the badge can help explain why some women refuse to sit on the train facing opposite to the direction of travel even though there are free double seats.

HolyShmoly · 09/06/2018 20:08

I'm pretty sure HappyMummy has made her feelings clear on this every time a thread comes up.

I live in Newcastle where the metro introduced these a year or so ago, my badge was a godsend over winter when my bump wasn't particularly visible due to coats, etc. I very rarely had to stand and as I had a walk either side of the metro journey it was very welcome. Especially when there were delays and I'd been standing on the platform for 20 minutes!
In the last month or so before finishing work my bump was plenty noticeable so I didn't need the badge, there was no mistaking it.
I didn't wear it during the first trimester, but to be honest I didn't really struggle until I started getting big and spd kicked in.

60sname · 09/06/2018 20:09

@happymummy12345 bully for you. It's a popular scheme. I am on mat leave now but would usually see 3-4 badges every day on my 10-minute walk from Liverpool St to the office.

PasstheStarmix · 09/06/2018 20:09

I didn’t bother with a badge but just placed hands protectively on my stomach when ever here was crowds or ignorant people and it seems to do the trick.

PasstheStarmix · 09/06/2018 20:10

‘seemed’

pbjs · 09/06/2018 20:10

Pure attention seeking

Of course they are attention seeking. That's the point.

It's getting the attention of those nearby to Give You A Fucking Seat.

You didn't ask anyone to move because you didn't need them to. SO what? You should be happy not ridicule others who had a worse time of it. If a woman has dizzness, SPD or hyperemesis too right she'd have asked. You'd probably judge her for risking her pregnancy if she fell over too.

pbjs · 09/06/2018 20:12

Also well done for using the tube for what, a month? Before moving home.

You are truly a hero.

Original poster

InDreamland · 09/06/2018 21:28

Thanks for all your replies. Didn't realise it would spark such emotion but I appreciate all the views.

I hate drawing attention to myself which is why I hate the idea of asking for a seat and having to announce to a crowded tube carriage in rush hour that I feel like c**p because I am pregnant - I am not as confident as other people (only confident with people I know well). I thought the badge might help me without having to say anything but at the same time also aware people will judge without a bump yet. Kinda catch22. I know I'm not helping myself.

I have found myself putting the protective hand on my stomach though when fighting my way on and off the trains and moving through the stations. Rush hour at Bank is not fun! It's even worse now with a mini me growing inside.

OP posts:

caraway33 · 09/06/2018 22:20

not very helpful perhaps, just a perpective from a country where a pregnancy badge is worn pretty much without an exception (japan that is)- a pregnancy badge makes very little difference! and zero in early pregnancy.
i think if you are not showing and need a seat, you need to ask, otherwise it just looks a quaint little badge.

butlerswharf · 09/06/2018 22:30

lol about @happymummy12345's username. It doesn't match her tone!

cryptonaut · 10/06/2018 00:25

I got mine through the post on Friday. I don't know if I'll use it, I guess it depends how I feel. I don't go into London often, only for customer meetings sometimes. I went in to Tower Hill for a meeting on Friday (before getting the badge) and was lucky to have a seat most of the time. I did start to struggle when I was standing though, the heat underground and all those bodies around me as well as the weight of my backpack when walking around didn't help matters. I'm going to keep the badge in my work bag so if I do need it I can use it. Can't hurt to carry it around just in case.

Fluffybat · 10/06/2018 10:58

I wore mine from 18 weeks with first and have just started it wearing it again with second at 17. Have started to get pelvic girdle pain again so will need to sit.

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