Milk supply drying up (?) on my 3-week-old hungry baby - please help!

[birthofawoman]

Title says it all. Been exclusively breastfeeding. Just as we'd established a good breastfeeding relationship with a good latch and a position we both loved (laying on our sides in bed), my 3-week-old baby began getting fussy during feeds (week 2 was perfect). Seemed as though he was frustrated about some aspect of the breastfeeding, whether it be that the milk wasn't coming out fast enough or not enough milk was coming out. Started getting worried that my supply was 'drying up' and, indeed it seems to be. Between my milk coming in and when this began, my breasts would be super full and often I'd have to express due to engorgement (I'd be able to fill a bottle fast, too). Today, however, I realised just how little milk I'm now producing. I understand that those early weeks are your body getting used to how much milk your baby needs, but this 'dry period' is worrying. Between my baby's hunger queues, his fussiness and frustration during feeding, and his lack of satisfaction at the end of feeds, my anxiety is and has been sky high. The thought of him being hungry and my milk supply not being able to satisfy him has been torturous. I even tried bottle feeding him for the first time with some expressed milk I froze during my engorged days - didn't take to the bottle (part of me was actually glad he didn't take to it because I wanted to exclusively breastfeed for the 'bonding' benefits, but then I remembered it means that his hunger will continue)... Now what? God knows how much milk he's actually received today. I feel like a terrible, failing mother who's starving her child. He's producing wet nappies (although we're probably short about 1 nappy, today), and when I hand express, indeed, milk comes out, but something has definitely changed in the past few days - today, specifically...

May be wise to mention that he's been very gassy this week, which has made him fussy and irritable in general.

I'm terrified I have an insufficient milk supply and I don't know how to get my supply up. Because of his aggressive latch during feeds due to frustration, my nipples are back to being as sore as they were in week 1 - adding to the immense struggle, right now!

I'm terrified. I'm anxious. Any advice will be helpful.

Thanks!

I'd contact your HV or midwife if you're worried.

Breasts are more like a fountain than a lake. They make milk as it is required once breast feeding is established. That you are no longer engorged is a positive sign. Babies cluster feed in order to increase milk supply, (and 3 weeks is a classic time) not because they aren't getting enough. If he is gaining weight and having plenty of wet nappies he's likely fine. I breastfed all mine, all gained weight beautifully, I could never express more than 2oz...so being able to express plenty isn't necessary either. Mine fed about every 1.5 hrs from start to start before weaning (longer at night!). The best resource for breastfeeding mum's in kellymom.com, it has such a huge amount of info. But it sounds like you are doing great!

Milk supply goes up and down until you're really established but you can increase your supply by expressing just after you have fed the baby each time (you won't express much but it tricks your body into thinking you need to make more), takes a day or two to make a difference. Also make sure you're drinking/eating plenty yourself. I thought I wasn't producing enough for my first baby, especially in the evenings, but she always put on weight so I'm the end I had to accept that she was but I understand how worrying it can be.

Nothing you’ve said would suggest that you have a low supply OP. As others have said, everything you’ve said seems perfectly normal. Kellymom has sone good info on what to expect in the early weeks and is baby getting enough milk.

If he’s gassy and you are sore, has he been checked for tongue tie? It might be worth seeing a tongue tie practioner just to rule it out. Can you get to your local Bfing Support Group too?

If your anxiety is really bad tonight, I’d call one of the 24 hour Bfing Helplines, but only if you can’t cope until the morning. Hope you have a better night and don’t forget to take sone paracetamol for your nipples

How are things this morning @birthofawoman?

Lots of wisdom here! Also as your supply settles it's normal not to get so engorged too, in itself that's not a bad sign. Is there a La Leche League near you? They also have lots of great advice

How full your breasts feel is not an indicator of how much milk you have/are making. It will feel different as initially your breasts are harder/engorged which can trick you into thinking they need to feel like that all the time. That’s not the case. The engorgement is related to your milk coming in. Realistically your breasts make milk as your baby feeds and store very little

Your baby being fussy isn’t a sign of not having enough milk. Right up until around 12 weeks your baby will have periods of increasing your milk supplies and will feed more often (cluster feeding), for longer and may seem fussy/unsatisfied. This is normal and does not mean you don’t have enough milk.
Your body makes milk in response to your baby removing milk. Providing your baby has access to feed on demand your body will meet his demands

As others have said, everything you've described sounds within the spectrum of normal - and a TT assessment could be helpful.

We're bombarded with so much crappy misinformation about baby feeding that it can be very hard to judge what's true and what's not. Another vote for Kellymom, and also the Analytical Armadillo (on FB ) - both reliable sources of evidence based breastfeeding information.

I would also suggest checking for a tongue tie... There are anterior and posterior tongue ties. Get your MW or HV to check for you.

Babies naturally "wake up" at about the 3 week mark as they shake off the birth sleepiness and become more difficult to settle. There is also a growth spurt at 3 weeks where they want to feed all the time. That's perfectly normal, just offer babu boob as frequently as he wants it and settle in. I wouldnt be surprised if yoi started to get the "fussy evenings"/witching hour now. That's nothing to do with milk supply, just what babies this age do.

Nothing you've writte suggests you haven't got enough milk, and if your baby is latching efficiently and extracting milk your supply will not just "dry up" suddenly. That's just not how it works. If your baby is healthy and can get milk out and you offer him the breast unrestrictedly, you will always make enough milk for him.

You're doing fine, honest. Stick on a box set and keep feeding.

It's very normal to not feel engorged as your supply steadies.

Also baby being very fussy / frustrated etc is completely normal.

They will fuss and cluster feed to stimulate more milk production.

With my daughter at 3-4 weeks I remember from 5pm-10pm literally being stuck to the sofa with her breast feeding with her at times pushing / lashing out and getting so frustrated.

I had moments I sat there in tears as it made me doubt my ability but we fed through it as a few weeks later she was a different baby again - happy - settled and more content.

If in doubt always seek support form your HV or even better BF support group or Breast Feeding Consultant who you can find through a local LLL group.

Wishing you the best of luck - Sounds like your doing amazing.

Have you got any breastfeeding support groups near to you or a support worker who could come out to you? I would definitely recommend getting in contact with someone and having that additional support network around you.

I thoughts the same around 3-4 weeks but he was just cluster feeding and has been putting on weight well.
Now 13 weeks and still exclusively breastfeeding most of the time (he gets the odd bottle occasionally as I go back to work in a few weeks) 2 nights ago he wouldn't settle and I genuinely don't think he was getting enough as he then downed a 100 ml bottle of formula but it has been really warm here and my mum then asked if I had been drinking enough water.. I probably hadn't so made a real conscious effort to drink more yesterday and we had no issues with feeds there was definitely enough milk for him even with his almost constant feeding (think ds is having a growth spurt 😊) my son will take a bottle and for me I like the reassurance that if need be I can give him formula if I think he isn't getting enough. I've only needed to do that twice though and both times coincided with a growth spurt. Plus it's nice for my husband to get to feed lo occasionally.

Sounds like you are doing a great job OP.

Breastfeeding is difficult, giving up at an early stage is common - often because people' mistakenly believe that a baby who wants to feed for hours is not getting enough milk.

I would suggest you join a breastfeeding mums' group or contact a breastfeeding adviser.

Good luck.

Hi, if your baby is still having wet nappies (6 or more a day) and at least 2-3 poos a day (the size of a 2 pound coin) it's a good sign that your baby is getting enough milk. Breast fullness and regularity of feeds are so variable. All sounds normal behaviour. X

Hey, mamas. Thanks for all your helpful responses - I'm reassured for the most part!

I think I've realised what may be going on. I think baby is going through a growth spurt and requires more milk. Growth spurt is making him fussy and impatient for milk. I seem to have two different problems in both breasts. Seems as though (to me, at least) that I have a slow flow (letdown?) in my left breast and a fast flow (letdown?) in my right breast. I say this because baby always seems like he's trying to make the milk come out faster when I feed him on my left side, whereas when I feed him on my right side his mouth always becomes really 'wet' and fills up with milk - often resulting in him choking or spitting the milk out/spitting up. Both problems result in him resisting my breasts, or spitting my nipple out soon after the feeding begins. What's interesting, though, is that this is rarely the case when he feeds straight after waking up. Either his ability to feed efficiently is better just after waking up or he's just more laid back and patient just after waking up. Maybe both have something to do with energy levels?

What's interesting is that these problems with flow or letdown only developed this week - they're not problems we had before.

It's been such a stressful few days that I've missed the opportunity to reach out for support, and now we've entered the weekend. I'll get in touch with some breastfeeding hotlines for now, and attend a few of my local drop-in clinics/support groups next week. I'll just have to persevere with him over the weekend.

He's producing enough wet nappies for me not to feel that I have to supplement with formula (was dreading this option, as I'm vegan and plan to raise him vegan - there's not a single vegan formula on the market for newborns!). Mind you, I do have a couple of expressed bottles in the freezer but they wouldn't be a long-term on option (if this ends up being a long-term problem) as 1) they'd eventually run out as there's only a few, and 2) I can't seem to be able to express anywhere near as much milk as I could when I produced those bottles (when I was engorged).

I'm hoping this is a short-term issue and related to his growth spurt. He was fine with accepting my breasts before, so surely he can be fine again?

Wise to note that my mum pointed to the possibility of oral thrush? His tongue is a little white (and became this colour within the past week and a bit), but I assumed it was just milk-stained. Haven't yet gotten registered (thus he's not with a GP), so I don't know who'd be able to confirm that it's oral thrush or not - who's diagnose this.

Anyway, I've said a lot...

Thanks, again, for your helpful words. Any additional advice would of course be useful!

Forgot to mention that because of my seemingly fast flow/overactive letdown with my right breast, my baby seems to have a hard time latching on that side now (again, this is a new problem and wasn't the case before). Because of how 'wet' the feed becomes (the fact that his mouth fills up with milk), it makes the surface of my nipple and areola slippery and his mouth will kind of slip off my nipple and unlatch. In fact, this is usually the case on this side rather than him actively spitting out my nipple.

For the fast flow you could try expressing off a bit before a feed, or else letting your baby suck to trigger letdown, then taking him off and catching the flow in a muslin, then letting him re-latch.

Just persevere on the slower flow side. Both those issues will likely resolve themselves in time. Apparently most people have one "better" boob :)

And if the white on his tongue can't be wiped off with your finger, no harm getting GP to check for thrush.

Totally agree that most people have one boob better than the other, it was definitely my experience and lots of other Mums I know.

Again it’s totally normal for you to be able to pump less, your body is getting used to what it needs to produce to keep baby satisfied.

Queen’s suggestion for the fast side is a worth giving a try, if you haven’t already. Have you thought of trying breast compressions on the slower side if you feel he’s not happy. Again though, there is nothing that you’ve said so far that would indicate a problem, it all seems to come under the banner of normal baby behaviour. Try not to get too stressed by it though.

Do give one of the Bfing Helplines a call, they are open now and you’ll be able to talk through what’s happening and how you’re feeling. Is there a La Leche League near to you too?

Sorry posted too soon. Could he just be different when he wakes because you’re more relaxed?

Have a read of My baby cries or fusses when breastfeeding, is something wrong? It will hopefully reassure you that everything seems fine, even if it’s not what you were expecting . Did you manage to read the other links I posted?

Basically, as long as he’s pooing daily and you have 6 wet nappies and he’s bright and alert at times as opposed to lethargic, everything is fine.

Once you’ve spoken to a BFC on one of the Helplines, it might be worth looking up biological nurturing as I think this style of Bfing might interest you

@birthofawoman you might like Breastfeeding for Beginners too, unlike a lot of baby gurus, this author is a BFC and mother herself

If you get in touch with your local LLL, not only can they offer support but some areas have books that you can borrow.

I did have problems with latch and supply and had quite a different experience to you (if that gives reassurance?) the big sign for me that something wasn’t working was fewer wet nappies but also a very sleepy and upset baby. She was screaming with hungry, would try and feed but then she just fell asleep as she was so exhausted and not getting any milk.