Hi... basically I'm feeling pretty alone in my pregnancy, with no emotional or financial support from the baby's father. When we discovered I was pregnant initially he was very happy about it, I was more scared than anything as I had just been made redundant, we hadn't moved in together yet and I already have a child to a previous relationship when I was a teenager (baby's dad checked out then and has never been apart of our child's life... 11 years later I've been coping well myself). Naturally my fears sprang from all of this. I try to be very realistic about life situations although my OH calls me negative, I can't help but feel I need to be realistic to prevent history repeating. Our unstable family situation and my fears created arguments and expressing wether the baby was the best choice or not with a few other situations like a day out my mum had bought tickets for us to see a show at was at 2.30 in the afternoon and he slept in for it.. when he eventually turned up he was stinking of drink (but I'm not allowed to question why or if he was out the night before because then he blames me for not trusting him), BD then decided he had enough of my "mood swings" and didn't want the situation anymore either with threats he would be leaving the country to a new job. We argued back and forward about this and everything and anything, it became quite nasty at times, with him telling me I must have driven my first child's dad away and that if I keep this baby I better not contact him for financial support and he won't have anything to do with it. I am not without fault as I said things too. In the end we have been trying to make it work but it's been so difficult, I love him but he's only ever had himself to look after and he is very irresponsible with work. He goes when he feels like it basically and when I confront him why he's not at work, he either lies and says he is or he gets angry at me for even asking. On top of this he doesn't make effort with my child just now, something else is always more important or there is an excuse he needs to work, but he's not always working and heaven forbid I acuse him of not working. I am trying to find a job at the moment and it's peoovinf difficult as I need to keep the pregnancy a secret from any employer to begin with which is really stressing me out feeling like I'm being dishonest from the start. I don't ask him for money or expect any money from him but I feel like everything will depend on me to get the ball rolling for us to live together. He has had credit so we need to depend on me for a new car and we have to decorate his home for it to be at a standard we can live in and I can move my existing child into. I have no emotional support from him, it's clear I'm literally screaming out for emotional support... I've always been a strong independent person but feel weak at the moment with no job and having to ask for emotional support but being called "bipolar" if I question anything or don't just agree with everything. Another example, his friend got kicked out his house and had to stay at his for the night which meant I couldn't go over there, fair enough I understand he's is trying to support his friend and do the right thing, they ended up getting drunk and I said "make sure u both get to work the next day" he assured me he wouldn't be missing work. The next day I called a few times and when he eventually answered he said they slept in and were just going to go into late... a few hours later I called him again and no answer. Eventually when I spoke to him (he wasn't at work) he was instantly annoyed at me because I said "I knew you weren't going to go" this led to him arguing with me and again threatening me that he would leave the country. I'm not a priority in his life and he is still continuing to live like he only has himself to look after. I'm worried about my child I already have and having someone to look up to, and the no effort in him trying to spend time with us. He would rather lie in his bed all day hungover to support his friend than aknowledge our own situation. I don't know what to do anymore...! Am I expecting too much? I've always had my shit together but this one moment in my life where I don't I feel like he is taking advantage of as he knows I don't want 2 kids 2 different dad's and on my own. He is playing on this and it feels cruel. Am I being erratic? Some impartial advice would be so appreciated? X