Please don't judge :(

[s0f98]

I am 12 weeks pregnant and really struggling to stop smoking. I feel so pathetic and useless that I have absolutely no will power and quite frankly I feel disgusting and ashamed of myself and so so selfish.

I am constantly reading about how bad it is and I've tried everything but I just can't stop and I know people will just think "well don't have one" but I don't have the will power.

Please no nasty comments, just advice, I don't know what else to try :(

Have you tried asking your midwife for help. They normally ask st your booking appointment. Xx

It is a very hard addiction to get over. I second talking to your midwife - you can't be the only pregnant woman in this position.

In the meantime could you focus on cutting down rather than cutting out. Every cigarette you don't smoke is a win for you. Also not sure if there is any benefit in switching to vaping? good luck.

Definitely speak to your midwife, they usually have a stop smoking service than can advise and support specifically in pregnancy. Good luck OP, it's a wonderful thing to do for you and baby.

Well at least you care enough to post asking for help - and for what it's worth my mum smoked throughout pregnancy (waaaaay back when it was perfectly acceptable to do so) and I'm healthy enough!

However, times move on and the risks are recognised and well published. But smoking is an addiction and it can be a very difficult one to overcome. As a first port of call, speak to your midwife/GP - they will be delighted that someone is trying to quit and have lots of help and advice to offer.

You've not said how many you smoke, but could you cut down at the very least - easier than just going cold turkey I imagine because you know that in xxxx hours' time you will be having another cigarette and its not like the cravings will go on and on and on with no respite.

Is vaping less harmful? After 20 years of smoking,my vape is my best friend(5 years on it)

Have you ever tried vaping OP? It's by no means proven to be 100% safe but research so far is indicating it's considerably less harmful than smoking when pregnant. I stopped with a vape (although wasn't pregnant) and found it really easy even having been a heavy smoker for 20 years.

Definitely speak to your MW and get her thoughts and then find a decent vape shop locally and get them to sort you out with a starter kit, best of luck

@Hidingtonothing are you me?!

Had exactly the same thought reading your post Bexter Weirdly I'm also about 5 years stinky-free and love my vape!

Your midwife should be able to refer you to a local smoking cessation service but you can also self refer. Might be worth phoning/dropping in to your gp practice as they often run stop smoking clinics. Agree with pp to cut down to start with, and/or consder vaping

No way @Hidingtonothing and we posted exact same time 🙂

Your MW, GP or local pharmacist will be absolutely thrilled to help you quit. There is loads of support out there for pregnant women who smoke, precisely because a) it's very addictive and therefore hard to quit, b) it really does have a big impact on your health and baby's.

Don't feel judged for asking for help

If you stop before 15 weeks there is research that says there will be no harm to your baby. Set a quit date maybe a week or 2 from now and cut down slowly in that time. Start to think about the times you want a cigarette (like after a meal) and plan what you will do instead.

Also- nicotine patches, gum, spray etc do say 'not suitable for use in pregnancy' on the packs. However they are much safer than smoking so if you feel that you can't stop without them then go ahead and use them.

Bit spooky that Bexter 😱😀

Have you managed to at least cut down? So halfing the amount you smoke or making a rule like "I won't have a cigarette until after 2pm" or something like that. Sounds silly but it might help you gradually quit. Definitely ask your midwife they will offer you lots of support

Read Allen Carr's 'easy way to quit smoking' book - I did 5 years ago and haven't touched a cig since I finished the book (you smoke while you read it). I was sceptical but it worked on me and I was a very addicted heavy smoker!
It is very repetitive but works kind of like hypnotisim. Honestly, go to Amazon and get it. I have literally not touched a cig or vape or anything since!

The way I stopped was by extending the time between each cigarette. So if you'd normally have one every 2 hours, make yourself wait 3 hours, even if it means you're clock checking and going for one as soon as the time limit is up. Then once you're comfortable with the 3 hours, extend to 4, etc and start making the intervals longer - so once you get to 6 you jump to 8, which is 2-3 a day, then you do it in numbers so I'm only allowed a max of 2 today, then 1 today, then one every other day, then 2 a week... by the time you're at this kind of level, you're not actually reliant on the nicotine at all and it's psychological, plus the amount of toxins you're taking in is so much reduced - you could then either stop completely or keep stretching out the time between them so that it's only very occasional, like you can have the occasional glass of wine.

Another psychological trick is not to tell yourself that you're quitting but just that you're not going to smoke for a while. The thought of "quitting" can feel like denying yourself whereas just not doing it for a while makes it like those other things you have to stop during pregnancy but you know you can go back to. Then you can make the decision about when you're happy to start again, which might be immediately after birth, might be when your baby is a bit older to minimise the risks to them, or once you're out of the addiction cycle you might decide is never. But the point being you don't have to decide right now that you'll never smoke ever again.

Don't be too hard on yourself addictions are hard to beat, that's why they are addictive! Many people struggle and you are not alone. Ask for help though don't try and do it all on your own, you are much more likely to be successful with professional support and it really will be the best thing that you can do for your baby.
Good luck :)

Talk to your MW. Smoking cessation is a big part of what they do. Could you switch to nicotine replacement therapy, like patches, gum, inhalators or vaping? All much better for your baby than smoking, but don't require you to go cold turkey on nicotine. Please ask for help - it's out there if you do.