Miscarriage, feeling extremely low

[L2018]

Hi,

I miscarried 4 days ago. I just feel like I’m constantly on the edge of tears, constantly having to hold them back with a lump in my throat. This was my second miscarriage and just feel heart broken. It’s even worse as I feel like my partner is just carrying on as normal. He’s done nothing but say to me what’s wrong! I’m just like what do you think is wrong. Our first miscarriage he cried but this one he hasn’t. I really feel like he doesn’t care. I’m due back at work Monday and I really don’t know how I’m going to cope. Please can anyone give me advice. X

Didn't want to read and run. Hugs for you. How many weeks were you?

Your partners attitude may just be his coping attitude. It is different because nothing much changes for them up to scan time, they don't "feel" pregnant or get symptoms. I know it's hard though.

Don't go back to work if you don't feel ready - you need time to grieve. X

Thank you for your comments.

I was 12+3 weeks and was two days away from my first scan.

I get this may be his way of coping but I feel his just been really inconsiderate. Every day since it’s happened I’ve done nothing but clean the house and had dinner on the table for him when he comes home. Not once have I had a thank you. I miscarried in the car on the way home from work, couldn’t pullover as I was going thought road works and didn’t want to cause a seen. Every day I’ve been out the front scrubbing my car seats and after 5 washes it’s still foaming up pink. He stands their watching me shaking his head. Not once had he offered to help. I really feel like I’m at breaking point.

Sorry to hear that, sounds like he's not being supportive at all :-(. Have you spoken to him about it?

So sorry for your loss x

Oh hunny I totally feel for you.

My daughter my was 10th pregnancy after 9 miscarriages varying from 4-5 weeks my latest was 21 weeks.

It is very very upsetting and your partners support is important. If he can't man up for you I'd be very upset too.

Re the car him not doing that for you is awful, it's the least he can do, Get an upholstery cleaner to come out to sort the car, they won't be shocked or disgusted they'll have cleaned all sorts of things and it saves you getting upset. X

Im so sorry for you... it is such a hard time.

My husband was the same after my 2nd miscarriage. It was such an awful time.
Give your self time. Cry when you need to cry. Dont go out if you dont feel like it. Just give yourself time, its normal to feel the way you do, it is such a heart breaking time.
Men handle Things differently. I hated my husband for not supporting me more. I even packed a bag and went to stay with a friend after a week as I felt so alone. But nothing really helped, because the truth is, only time will. And it WILL get better.
Also remember 4 days after a miscarriage you are still filled with hormones and they will be affecting you a lot.
💕

Just saw your second message!
Get your car cleaned professionally, you shouldn't be scrubbing and exhausting yourself so soon after a miscarriage. Drop it off somewhere and pick it up an hour later.

Can you talk to your husband and explain nicely how unsupported you feel and that you are struggling? Do you have friends or family you can rely on?

Sending you lots of courage. It will get better with time xx

So sorry to hear this. You don't need to go back to work on Monday, you don't sound ready at all and no wonder. You need to take time to take this in and to look after yourself. I'm sorry to hear your DH is not being kind. It sounds like he's being very unkind. Could you go to a friend or family member who will treat you with kindness? You need that just now.

So sorry to hear of your loss, very very sad. You need all the support you can get at the moment :-) take good care of yourself x

Thank you to everyone for you lovely supporting comments.

I’ve woke up this morning feeling more emotional than ever. I feel stuck in time but my brain is going 100000 miles per hr. Me and my partner are going to New your in two weeks and I just don’t know how I’m going to cope. I know I’ll probably feel a bit better but I’m just stressing. Still haven’t booked airport parking, booked any attractions or even changed any money. I just feel like I’m scared to leave the house in case I see a pregnant women. Xx

Morning;
It's nice you have something lovely to look forward too it'll do you could.

Although it's going to take time to start feeling better about everything, filling your time with nice activities etc is a good plan of action x