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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Success stories and advice of alcohol consumption during unknown pregnancy

41 replies

FuzzMonkey · 11/05/2018 05:59

Hello,

It's taken me a while to build up the courage to post here but I'm feeling very stressed, guilty and upset and wanted advice and support from anyone who's been in a similar situation. This is the first time I've posted but have been on for a while.

I'm 28 years old, 26 weeks pregnant and had been on the pill for 15 years (different types but most latterly the mini pill which meant no period).

Because of my no periods and long time on contraception (and the fact I'm a size 16 so didn't notice growth), I didn't know I was pregnant until 20 weeks. It was a huge shock but a very welcome surprise.

However, up until I found out, I had been drinking. Not every day but way more than I should have as a pregnant woman.

This is what I can remember consuming during the 20 weeks:

  • 1 bottle of wine (in an evening) at 20 weeks (a day or so before I found out)
  • 3/4 glasses of gin (at a gin tasting event) at around 19 weeks
  • 1 bottle of wine (in an evening) at 17 weeks
  • a few mixed drinks (wine and spirit) at a party at 15 weeks
  • 1 bottle of wine (in an evening) at 14 weeks
  • a few drinks here and there over the festive period so would have been between 6 and 8 weeks

Other than that, I've taken a few prescribed sleeping tablets now and again but am generally healthy, eat loads of fruit and veg, take vitamins and a smoothie daily and exercise through walking and yoga.

I am so cut up about the thought of consuming this much and the damage that drinking may have done. I'm struggling to focus and feel guilty and very upset.

I spoke to the midwife and doctor as soon as I found out and while the scans and tests have come back fine, it's simply a waiting game at this stage. In the past few weeks, I've started to feel the baby move which has brought it all home.

I guess what I'm looking for is some moral support and success stories of anyone who's consumed more than the recommended alcohol intake when pregnant. From the moment I found out I'm pregnant, I haven't taken a drink and won't throughout the remainder of my pregnancy.

Thanks for reading. X

OP posts:
Synecdoche · 11/05/2018 06:07

My mum didn't know she was pregnant with my sister and was drinking gin and pils with the best of them! My sister is absolutely fine. Hope all goes well with the remainder of your pregnancy OK, try not too worry 💐

Bibijayne · 11/05/2018 06:49

My sister's friend is a slightly larger lady, who spotted every month throughout pregnancy. She discovered she was pregnant a week after going to Alton Towers... When she went into hospital with abdominal pains and the nurse said 'You're 5cms dilated,' - mum and baby were and are fine. Her little boy is now a very active toddler. She drank and ate as usual through her pregnancy because she had no idea she was carrying a ninja baby.

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 11/05/2018 07:22

Thanks, Synecdoche.

Wow, Bibijayne. That's an amazing story. How far along was she when she ended up going into labour? I've heard so many stories of people not knowing and always wondered how they didn't...until now.

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MaverickSnoopy · 11/05/2018 08:32

My friend found out at 5 months. She didn't have periods and was told she could never have children. She was a very heavy drinker. Several pints of beer and night 3-4 times a week, a bottle or so on the weekend. We went on holiday just before she found out and she drunk and enormous amount. Baby was absolutely fine. Obviously not an advert that's it ok to drink like that during pregnancy, just that in this case she was fine. She also gave up drinking as soon as she found out.

My husbands gramdmother says she doesn't understand the modern approach and that it was quite normal for women to drink in pregnancy. She said she'd have 6 or 7 g&ts on a Saturday night.

Times have changed and it's not ok to drink and you know that which is why you've stopped. You didn't know, so I hope you don't blame yourself.

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 11/05/2018 10:47

MaverickSnoopy again, wow. I guess everyone is different in how their bodies and babies deal with the impact of different things. So lovely to hear the good stories though. Thank you.

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Bibijayne · 11/05/2018 15:26

Her baby was just over 7lbs... so pretty far along! They'd not been trying and she'd been getting what she thought were periods throughout... so had no clue!

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 11/05/2018 17:22

It just shows you it can happen.

I can't help but feel guilty. Does anyone know if there are further tests that can be done or is it simply a waiting game?

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1Wanda1 · 11/05/2018 19:43

Try not to worry.

I know a woman who got pregnant for the third time in her mid 40s. Her other kids were adults and she thought she couldn't get pregnant any more so never thought about it and didn't find out she was pregnant till about 6 months in.

Thing is, she was a massive raver. Out most weekends, drank a lot and used recreational drugs a lot. Her DC is now 7 or 8 and is absolutely fine.

As others have said, not an advert to ignore the advice, but I hope it gives you some reassurance.

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

greatorex2017 · 11/05/2018 19:46

I don't think there are any tests, I'm sure that if all the scans are okay then everything is fine. Try not to worry, I think I read somewhere that the body would reject a pregnancy if there were any major problems. I've heard of alcoholics who have drank the whole pregnancy and have had healthy babies, FAS is very rare.

TwitterQueen1 · 11/05/2018 19:53

Meh... if all the tests and scans are fine I really, really wouldn't worry. And stop beating yourself up about it. Without any concrete evidence at all I can confidently say you are not the 1st nor the last to drink during pregnancy.

Relax. And enjoy (ha ha - not my favourite time) your pregnancy and try not to stress. All will be well.

Vinorosso74 · 11/05/2018 20:04

I wasn't as far gone when I realised at 8 weeks. I'd had two really heavy nights out probably around 4/5 weeks and drunk ridiculous amounts along with smoking a stupid amount (I only smoke when I've drunk too much) I had generally had a few weeks where I drank more than normal.
I did mention it to the midwife who was very reassuring. DD is now 8 and absolutely fine.
I certainly wouldn't advise following what I did but try not to worry and congratulations.

Bytheseabythesea · 11/05/2018 20:20

I found out at 4.5 months and had drunk a moderate amount over that period. DD is three now and absolutely fine. I did a lot of reading about the placenta and discovered it really is amazing at filtering out all the bad stuff. It's very unlikely your baby has been harmed by your drinking. Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Mousefunky · 11/05/2018 20:27

This happened to my DM with me and I can confirm I am alive and perfectly healthy Grin.

I know a woman who didn’t find out until she was seven months pregnant. She was 18 and at uni drinking constantly. Her baby is fine as well.

Mousefunky · 11/05/2018 20:28

(Well he’s ten now and healthy)

BiscayTrafalgarFitzroy · 11/05/2018 20:45

Despite the scaremongering caused amongst pregnant woman that one little drink will damage your baby, foetal alcohol syndrome really is due to heavy and sustained alcohol consumption during pregnancy - much more than you've listed.

I know it's easier said than done but I really don't think you should worry - I'm sure your baby will be fine Flowers

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 11/05/2018 21:13

Thank you lovely people for taking the time to share your reassuring stories.

I do sincerely hope that I can report back in August and share some good news Smile.

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Iswallowtoothpaste · 11/05/2018 21:27

My friend didn’t find out that she was pregnant until she was 35 weeks!! She’d been going out every weekend and getting wrecked, lambing sheep and everything. Baby was fine born at 7lb something.

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 13/05/2018 08:02

Wow, 35 weeks! The body is amazing Cake

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Iswallowtoothpaste · 13/05/2018 11:58

@FuzzMonkey I know it’s crazy! Shortest pregnancy ever!

Petalflowers · 13/05/2018 12:07

Twenty odd years ago, there wasn’t a complete ban on alcohol in pregnancy, and it was okay to have an odd drink.

Just found this article saying that moderate drinking will not harm a baby.

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/pregnant-women-told-moderate-drinking-will-not-harm-the-baby-8662605.html

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 13/05/2018 19:12

I've read articles similar to that one but for each piece if information saying its OK, there's a conflicting argument that is absolutely isn't OK.

I'd certainly feel more relaxed if I'd only had an odd glass but I really was drinking way more Blush.

Thanks for the reassuring posts.

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Smellyjo · 13/05/2018 20:34

Hi, I can totally understand your worry and I'm sure I'd be the same, but it's great to hear these reassuring stories I'm sure. I just wanted to say that whatever has happened now has happened- most likely nothing - but in any case, worry does nothing whatsoever to improve the situation. The best you can do for your baby now is what you are doing, plus trying to relax and have a low stress pregnancy. I'd recommend meditation/ hypnobirthing etc to give you techniques to manage how you're feeling and practice taking control of your mind when worry threatens to take over. All the best for the rest of the pregnancy!

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 13/05/2018 20:51

You're so right, Smellyjo. I'm doing pregnancy yoga and really trying to get into the calm birth thing so I am hopeful for a positive birthing experience. Thanks Flowers

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WazFlimFlam · 13/05/2018 21:30

It sounds like you were drinking weekly rather than daily. That means the baby hasn't been continually exposed to alcohol, which is where the fas risks come in.

Remember there was a time when people drank beer rather than water as it was safer!

Original poster
FuzzMonkey · 13/05/2018 22:04

Yeah it was defo weekly but usually a bit of a binge when I did. That's true - pretty sure Russia only just changed their laws on beer as a soft drink in recent years!

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