Having a wobble - come and reassure me!

[Eminybob]

I’m currently 10 weeks pg with dc2.

Much planned for and wanted baby, we were ttc for almost 2 years.

At the end of last year, as the gap between ds and potential dc2 was extending beyond 4 years, and I’m getting older, and the stress of ttc, we decided to stop trying and come to terms with only having 1.

Which was fine, I made peace with it, planned holidays and ordered a kitchen and all the stuff we were able to do now we didn’t have to think about paying out for nursery fees again etc etc.

Well of course, 2 months into “not trying” (but not being careful because I assumed we have fertility issues, and of course it would not be the end of the world if we did get pregnant) I got my long awaited BFP.

We are over the moon, obviously, the plan was always to have 2.

But now I’m getting the wobbles. All the reason why we stopped trying - money worries, the gap will be 4 years 4 months which feels too big as I really want ds to have a buddy rather than just little brother/sister, going through the sleepless nights and the weaning and the potty training again.

Please tell me it’s going to be ok? Is it normal to feel this way because to be honest shitting myself!

It will be fine! My girls have a five year gap between them and they are best friends, now 3 and 8 (now pregnant with number 3!) It’s also nice to have your eldest at school so you can deal with a newborn and stuff. It will 100% work out well don’t panic

Also it’s normal to feel like that as well. Don’t be so hard on yourself! I worry about the 8 year gap between my eldest and this new baby, but it will all be fine and I know that they will love each other regardless xxx

It'll be fine. Imo best gap is very close or about what you'll have. Mine are 4y5m apart

Thank you! I think what has panicked me was reading another thread on here about 3 years being the perfect gap, which was the original plan.
But yeah, ds is going to school in September so it’s going to work out well in that respect.

It’ll be ok.

My DSD will be 8 when this little one comes along and DD will be 5. Had a M/C 2.5 years ago so obviously would’ve initially had them closer together and it’s taken us this lon to get that BFP again. It’ll all work out xx

There's a 7 year age gap between me and my brother and we couldn't be any closer!

You'll be fine

Were you close when you were growing up? There are 4 years between dh and his brother and they are really close now but fought like cat and dog when they were kids.

Oh and another thing, I feel a lot older and more knackered this time round - I’m really struggling with being pregnant god knows how I’m going to cope with a newborn!

I'm 8 weeks pregnant and all going well there will be almost a 9 year gap between dd and new baby.

I don't think there is a perfect age gap. I personally think it depends on the personalities of the children. You can have a smaller gap and not get along well at all.

Eminybob yes we were very close growing up, of course we had arguments but we've always been so close! It may help that we're very similar people!