Wanting to quit job at 12 weeks pregnant

[Kknightxx]

Hello.

I am 12 weeks pregnant tomorrow. I am aware that the earliest you can start maternity leave is 29 weeks. I desperately want to leave my job. I've already taken 3+ sick days because of the stress and anxiety of being at work, I feel much happier in the comfort of my own home, even if i'm not earning money.

I feel like I am being bullied, my colleague is constantly in a awful mood with me, I can't do anything right. I do 45 hour weeks in an office and it's just making me so depressed and unhappy, the thought that I have to go back to that place tomorrow is making me really anxious.

My partner & family just say stick it out as I can get my maternity and I am getting a morgage within the next few months (Super cheap morgage) but nobody understands what I am going through on a day to day basis, and how miserable I am.

Any advice? Is there much that I can do?

If you REALLY want to leave, you may be entitled to maternity allowance rather than SMP - same pay as SMP, the only difference is you don't get the first 6 weeks paid at 90%.

Hi, I've just looked at this on GovDirect, and it says you can claim once you at 26 weeks pregnant.

Talk to your manager and HR about the bully.

See if your work offers any counselling for stress and anxiety and talk to your GP including about how you'd rather just be at home. Is your anxiety this job or any job or leaving the house at all?

45 hours a week is not particularly long hours, so stop moaning about that.

Maternity leave is not a long term solution unless your DP is happy to support you forever, so stop seeing that as the answer.

Even if he was happy to do so since you're not married that's not a great idea. You also have the issue of your upcoming mortgage. So stop focusing on maternity and try to work out how to fix your work situation.

You could look for another job - which may be hard given that you are pregnant - but if you are that desperately unhappy you could do so and then claim MA.

You’ll be glad of your maternity pay in the long run. And it will be less pressure on your partner to provide for you both. People underestimate the stress that fathers have when they are providing for a wife and baby.

I would speak to your manager/HR regarding the moody person or perhaps tell them exactly how they are making you feel - stand up for yourself, don’t be a victim.

Stick it out.

Speak to HR about the work colleague and get that sorted.
With your mortgage and the new baby you might need to protect your income,I appreciate that you feel sick and tired and your hormones are running haywire but things will get better and you will feel more energized and positive soon and might regret having given up.
Take one day at a time,he nice to yourself,relax in the evenings and weekends.
Can you work from home at all?
Speak to your Dr s/he may be able to help.
Hold on in there OP,remember soon you will have a bundle of joy to cuddle.

Can you go to your GP and look at getting signed off for a few weeks?

It would give you some time to relax and think about what is best to do next. The first trimester is so hard but for most the sickness does get better - so might he worth sticking it out?

Also if your colleague is being difficult take it up with your manager/HR! What a horrible person- you’re pregnant and bullying is not okay!

The first thing to do is see if you can find out if the other individual treats anyone else in a similar way by talking to others who also work with them. Then escalate to HR or management about your own situation. (If you are in a union talk to them first before doing so.)

Then take as much sick leave as you need off. Get your GP to sign you off. While it isn't an excuse, pregnancy makes some women ill but you should see if you GP will put on your sick notes that the cause is stress due to bullying.

Unfortunately as you are both stressed and pregnant getting a new job won't be easy, so you may as well stick with this one until you can take maternity leave and then don't come back.

BTW I was bullied at work. I found out the individual had a history off it and was bullying others. To cut a long story short I went legal and was helped by lots of people including a union and other people going through it. I found out while I was going through my case that it's best not to walk out of a job even more so if you have a good excuse to leave in a few months.