How common is a mmc after 12 week scan?

[CathyandHeathcliff]

I'm already getting myself into a state about the 20 week scan. I thought after seeing the strong heartbeat last week and seeing the baby growing well in there, I would be fine.
I'm 13+5 today and terrified I'll have a MC or MMC. I know I'm supposedly out of the danger zone but it doesn't feel like it.
I don't have any sort of bump yet, I can't feel my uterus, my tummy is still squishy and I have odd period like cramps on and off that I keep telling myself is stretching pain. No bleeding.

Please help! Im driving myself mad.

It's totally normal to feel anxious like this, I felt the same way when I was pregnant and was constantly seeking reassurance from the midwife. I know it's easy to say and probably not helpful but try to relax and enjoy your pregnancy. There is no reason for anything to go wrong and every reason for everything to go right. Take it day by day

I would imagine it's fairly uncommon to have a MMC after the 12-week-scan. Once you start feeling the baby moving you may find that reassures you. The first part of the second trimester can feel like limbo as your symptoms may have eased but it's too early for movements.

It's normal to worry but it will not do you any good or change the outcome. The odds are massively in your favour at this point.

What @MonicaGellerHyphenBing says is so true. You can't control anything so try to let that urge to do so go. I look back now and regret being in such a state because i didn't let myself enjoy my pregnancy. Like you, after the 3 month scan I was freaking out about the 20 week scan. But it was all fine all the way through. And my worrying achieved nothing. Don't catastrophise over what you can't control - take each step as it comes.

Risk of mmc before 12 weeks is only about 1% so after 12 weeks it's going to be way less than that, as mc of any sort is much rarer at this point. I am 15+3 and have had the full range of weird and bizarre stretching pains. Everything I've read (and yes, I'm an obsessive worrier too) indicates that if there is no bleeding, there is no need to worry.

As for having a bump, I went to pregnancy yoga last night with people ranging from 17 to 35 weeks pregnant and their bumps were so variable. One lady was 21 weeks with her second child and I wouldn't have said she was any further along than me! Try to relax I like to lie on my back with my hand on my belly (also no real bump as yet) and 'send' happy thoughts to my baby, usually once a day before I go to sleep. It always makes me smile. I think the positive hormones are supposed to be beneficial, for both of you, so maybe worth trying something similar xx

OP - are you getting any support for your anxiety? I recognise your username from posts about your 12 week scan and I can see you are really struggling.

Have you spoken to your midwife and GP?

I felt and continue to feel the same way! I’ve worried since the first week I had my BFP. First the early viability scan, then some pains which I ended up in EPU for, then the 20 week scan. And now baby is moving I worry when he isn’t as active. He tends not to be that active on a morning so by the time I get to work I’ve usually convinced myself something terrible has happened.
I’m 21+3 now and he is currently bouncing around under my belly button :)
Awful and sad things do / can happen but the reality is that % wise it’s a very low chance considering how many pregnancies and babies we have in the world every day!
Try to remind yourself that the chances are really, really slim and when you find yourself in a negative thought pattern try to focus on something nice about being pregnant!
Your bump will come! Mine popped at about 18 weeks and baby started to move at 19. Doesn’t stop the panic but it’s a lovely feeling x