Feeling a bit isolated and overwhelmed with it all

[thumbelina03]

I don't post here often, but needed a place to share how I have been feeling.

I'm currently 31 weeks pregnant and the enormity of the baby being here soon is all a bit overwhelming. Hubby's family are 6 hours away and my family, whilst local, are not particularly hands on. I think my biggest concern is that I am worried I am going to feel really alone and isolated once the baby has arrived.

We have signed up for local NCT classes - we thought it would be a good way to network and hopefully forge some local links. However, 2 classes in and I am fretting this isn't going to happen and come the end of the sessions, we'll all go our separate ways. Nobody has made any suggestions about linking in outside of the group - I know it usually takes 1 to suggest, but not sure how these things usually work.

I have spoken to my midwife about how I have been feeling and have been told that feeling overwhelmed and teary is natural and part of the pregnancy journey.

Is it just me or are others feeling this way too?

I'm a mum to a two year old and pregnant with my second... it's very normal to feel overwhelmed, especially as you get closer and closer to the birth.

The truth is that motherhood can be quite isolating if you're stuck at home with the baby all day... I don't have any family nearby, so joining NCT was a sanity saver for me! During the course, I didn't think I would make lifelong friends with anyone, and couldn't see us keeping in touch, but at the end of it, some-one suggested we set up a whatsapp group... and it was the best idea because once the babies started arriving, we all suddenly had lots in common, and could chat at weird hours when we were up with the baby... that helped a lot with feeling less alone. We ended up meeting up, and finding things to do with the kids... and now it doesn't really matter if we'd have got on before kids because we've bonded over having kids and doing things together.

If you don't make friends at NCT though, I would suggest taking the baby to local baby groups... sign up for a sensory class or baby gym or baby massage... anything really just to get out and meet other new mums, as difficult as it may be in the beginning... also getting out for walks to the park/playground help... sometimes you'll meet mums that way. Local churches also usually have some kind of baby/toddler groups so maybe try that (you don't have to be a churchgoer to attend them). Libraries do rhyme time. Just try to find out what's available in your area and get out of the house, that's the best advice I can give you :)

Also it does get easier as you settle into a routine so try not to worry about it too much!

I worried about the same, even though family are only half an hour away i knew i wouldn't see them every single day and I worried I'd get cabin fever stuck in with a screaming baby. DDs now 4 weeks old and the last 4 weeks have been so busy but DPs back at work now so i knew I had to make an effort to do something. I've just signed up to a Rhythm Time group to start next week so im hoping to meet some new mums there. I'm rubbish at talking to new people and making friends though so it's all a bit nerve wracking for me.
The point I'm trying to make is I think you just have to put yourself forward for lots of groups etc and get out the house as much as possible, even just for walks to the shop. I get excited about baby weighing clinic, very sad lol!

I’m terrified tbh. I’m 27 weeks so still have a bit to go but being alone with the baby all seems a bit scary. I hate being alone and fear how on Earth I’m going to cope. Part of me just wishes I could go back to work and let my husband work it all out. I know nothing about babies. I’ve never fed one, changed a nappy or anything.

I didn’t fancy nct as it seemed a bit preachy. So I’ve signed up to another provider and hope to meet others there.....

Thank you for your replies.

It’s reasuting to know feeling like this is normal!!

I’ll see how NCT pans out but will definitely look at joining some groups once baby is here. We’re going to be in a flat until we move to our house in August so wil definitely need to get out. I suppose one positive is it’s not winter!!