35 weeks pregnant with toddler and shattered don't know what to do..

[Katieemilyxo]

I currently am 35 weeks pregnant and suffering with very low iron and aneima, I also have a21 month old whos constantly needing my attention smacks my belly kicks me and smacks me all the time we have been moved into a small 3 story one bedroom flat and been told I won't be offered anything else for at least two years I struggle to even walk to the shop as my aneima makes me very weak and I have passed out a couple times, I have no family which can come over and help and the father just comes over and gives me more work to do and slobs around the house I feel like a aweful mum all we can really do is watch the tv or play with his toys as I struggle to go anywhere even just the park my son also is very heavy and when he had a tantrum or refuses to walk up the stairs as there's no lift I end up having to sit there for hours on end till he finally decides he's had enough, I'm so tired and struggling to stay awake or do everyday tasks and I feel so sorry for him sitting in all day everyday he does go to nursery 3 times a week but it's now closed for Easter I don't know what to do anymore or what activities we can do together as whenever I try anything he will play up or ruin it or lob everything everywhere i gave in to picking him up and also ending up giving myself a hernia which iv just recoverd from too. I'm tired struggling and don't know what to do anymore he's making things such hard work but I know he's just bored and wants more attention but it's so hard, is there anyone out there feeling like me or have any ideas to what we could do I need help:/

Are you on an iron supplement for the anemia? That’s my first question, although I’d imagine you are.

Secondly, your DS is 21 months old therefore has absolutely no idea what is going on. He really won’t care or remember that for a few weeks in his life he sat around the house watching CBeebies and playing with his toys. It’s easy to beat yourself up as a parent and believe it or not it’s a strong indication you’re a good parent. As long as he is fed, warm, clean and loved that really is all that matters at his age. As for his boredom, the only thing I can really think of is either a local parent and toddler group or softplay. If they’re local enough for you to get to where you can just sit and watch him that is. You have my sympathy about the tantrums, that is entirely normal behaviour for a toddler however frustrating it may be.

You need to have strong words with the Father... he either comes over to help you out or he doesn’t bother at all. There’s no point having him come over just to make more mess and create more stress for you. Ask him to take DS out for a few hours to give you a break.

The good thing is your baby will be here in a few weeks so there isn’t long to go. Hopefully once the baby is here your health begins to improve. I wish you all the best .

Yes I have to take 2 iron tablets a day which doesn't seem to make me any better and just make me throw up I told my midwife refuses to change them and saids to carry on taking them. I have tryed soft opplays and they have ago at me for letting him play in there on his own and I can't fit or even keep up with him, I make sure he's had his three meals a day changed and warm ect just feel it's not enough. He won't take him out just sits eats and does nothing I'm stupid for letting him in just struggling to be alone right now thank you for your kind words x

I'm 31 weeks with twin pregnancy and a toddler DS too and became v anaemic in this pregnancy. Despite taking two or three times the maintence dose of iron supplements for months now, my haemoglobin and stored iron counts did not increase one single point. I felt absolutely drained, terrible. Last week I was given a dose of intravenous iron. It was like a miracle. I felt 100% better after about three days and better still now.

Go to your doctor and push hard for it. I honestly cannot believe how low I was and how much better I am now.

Apparently there is a strong link between anaemia and PND which I can well believe.

I had to have a blood test to see if they was working haven't heard anything yet and I feel that way really low like I just could sleep all day everyday I will mention the injection at my next appointment goodluck with twins and a toddler !xx

Have you heard of Homestart? It sounds like you've got a lot on and not much support. Homestart can send a volunteer to help you out. Have a Google and see if they cover your area. Take care of yourself.

No I've never heard of homestart before? And thank you x

Katieemilyxo please make a bloody big fuss until they give you a good dose of iv iron. Next thing you will be up at night with a new baby and no energy.

Being pregnant with a toddler is such hard work . CBeebies is your friend. Does he like baths? If you have a bath, would be splash around in that for half an hour or so.

Homestart is a great idea, a bit of support like that could really give you a lift. What about your health visitor, have you seen them recently? If not maybe phone and tell her what's going on, ask for her support and advice on what's available for you. I really feel for you, I'm only 17 weeks with a toddler but a supportive husband and I'm still knackered. You're doing great. Try to focus on what you are doing rather than what you can't do just now.

Also 35 weeks with anaemia and a toddler, it's hard! Definitely don't feel bad about relying on tv until nursery starts again. I couldn't keep down the prescribed iron tablets either, they made me feel horrendous, so I've been taking Spatone iron supplements, and my numbers are going up according to my last blood test. Might be worth checking out, but definitely mention IV iron to the doctor too, if you're quite badly anaemic I'm not sure spatone or throwing up iron tablets will get you to the levels you need to be. and not long until our babies are here!!

Thank you so much for all your kind words i recently moved so I have no health vistor and a new midwife and she's very busy and I literally am in and out she doesn't seem to care much and it being a smaller area she's the only midwife at the surgery going to nag for that injection I could really do with that pick up doesn't help I have low blood pressure to and look like a walking zombie 😂 I do take baths with my little one but he is a very hyperactive little one ( his dad has ADHD hyperactivity ) so literally it entertains him for five minutes! Goodluck to all u lady's in ur pregnancys and thank u for the pick up xx