Number 3, feeling very scared! Tell me your stories

[cloudybay27]

Found out today I am pregnant with baby number 3, not planned, not unwanted but not really ‘wanted’. We have 2 DDs aged 6&3yrs and things have just got ‘easier’ particularly where DD2 is concerned. Anyway obviously our contraception failed (yes, we were using it!) and I think I’m around 5.5weeks. I’ve only realised today as have had what I thought was a very light period last week but today realised my boobs are huge / sore and I have some cramping. I’m going to go to the EPU tomorrow as have had a MMC before and obviously am concerned about the light bleeding although it seems to have stopped.

What I’m most worried about is DH and I hadn’t planned this, we can afford it but career wise it’s not ideal timing for me, just got back ‘into’ it and we had plans to do various things over the next few years with the girls that will have to take a back seat. It’s obviously not then end of the world and I am sort of happy as had always thought ‘maybe’ we would have a third as both still 35 so hopefully not too old I just wasn’t planning it now / sure we ever would. But now I just feel confused and a bit sad tbh, the life we had planned for our others will be different as will ours. I would not consider termination so that’s not an option for me personally.

Has anyone had a good experience of this? I think I just need a few people to tell me what a wonderful addition their third child was to an already happy family.

Forgot to add I had one quite difficult pregnancy (sickness) and two difficult births, 3rd degree tear for first time and infected ELCS scar and faulty anaesthetic insertion (!) with the second so part of me not being keen obviously stems from that but a lot of my reasons are more selfish eg I’ve jusy got really fit, back to a size 8 and planning to do a half marathon! Slightly gutted I won’t be doing that and need to hear some happy stories that make me forget this short term loss!!

Thanks Lala, yes can’t say I am not worried we might get a more difficult ride with a third...I guess you just never know!

yey cloud I had 3, exact same spacing as you, 3 years apart. Was planned so cant help you on the shock side of things 😁. However, my third birth was the easiest and least painful by far and having 3 kids has been fine. Busy, chaotic, hectic, but fine 😁. Take some time to process, you'll be fine.

I had three under five. My third birth was lovely and easy. I didn't need any pain relief and half an hour later I was eating fish and chips. I found my third fitted right in, straight away. Having three for us was no more difficult than having two and definitely easier than just having one.

THank you. DH and I have just had a chat about it as he was definitely more 😬 about it all than me I think but I’ve managed to get him to see that long term it would probably be really lovely for us and our other two, short term obviously hard work but hopefully worth it. He is one of three and has a great relationship with both siblings so he can at least see advantages in later life!! Will see how I get on at the EPU as for now still not sure I actually believe it!