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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Oregnant, stressed and anxious, can't eat

17 replies

Helsbells218 · 08/03/2018 07:05

Please help. I have just found out I am pregnant after 2 years of infertility. I was always devestated when the test results come back negative and now it's positive I feel so anxious, sick, tearful and scared. I feel like I'm going out of my mind. I constantly feel sick due to the anxiety and find it hard to eat. I went to the doctors but they could not really help, I keep thinking maybe I should terminate but I don't think I could do that. I am having panic attacks and I'm finding it hard to function. Is this normal? My partner is lovely and is telling me that everything will be fine... why am I feeling like this? I'm so scared and feel so alone. I don't know what to do. I just want to feel normal again and happy, instead I'm the total opposite xx

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Namechangemum100 · 08/03/2018 07:12

In my experience this feeling is totally normal and will pass. Finding out you are pregnant can be a big shock as it all becomes very real. I felt the same with both of my pregnancies.

Give it a little time, the feeling will pass and you will then be able to enjoy it.

Congratulations.

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 08/03/2018 07:17

Thank you so much. I'm so scared. Did you do anything to try and relieve the stress and anxiety? I need to eat but when I do i feel sick... it's the anxiety I know but I feel so guilty. I'm trying everything to try and turn these feelings around and nothing is helping. I'm scared that I will push my other half away by being like this also xx

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LyannaStarktheWolfMaid · 08/03/2018 07:20

Take a few days off and stay in bed with some movies. Stock up with some really plain food you can nibble, like plain biscuits and white toast. The first few weeks can feel dreadful, it will pass.

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 08/03/2018 07:22

Thank you, I will try that. Is it normal to feel like your cracking up with all the stress and anxiety. I feel like I can't function at all xx

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Emelene · 08/03/2018 12:53

Be kind to yourself OP. It sounds like you've been through a lot in the last few years that has been really hard. You've had a shock (even though it's a nice one) and you need time to process.

Can I suggest joining the November babies board on antenatal? I'm 5+5 with my first pregnancy and there are a group of friendly ladies already there so we can support one another.

FranticallyPeaceful · 08/03/2018 13:04

Honestly this is normal, unfortunately.

You need to make sure you have lots of days doing nothing if possible. Watch some tv, eat lots of food, think about nothing. I’m 29 weeks and I’m still trying to force myself to do this! I’m an anxious mess right now, every small thing grinds me down, the fact I had to delay my carpets due to damp I didn’t even know about feels like my world has ended. Honestly I had a full on breakdown yesterday because of it! It’s not like me at all. Everything is too much but because pregnancy turns your brain into mush we deal with it far less efficiently than when we aren’t... for me it feels like I can’t do anything, I just get stuck trying to figure things out and can’t function and my brain refuses to process things correctly so I can figure them out. Absolute nightmare!

Don’t worry though! It’s normal. It’s also normal to lose your appetite at times. I totally lost mine from about 10-16 weeks I could barely eat anything and ended up losing weight. But I’m eating properly again now.

Rest, and think about nothing

littledinosaurs · 09/03/2018 18:21

Hope you're feeling a bit better today OP

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 19:28

Thank you all so much. It's. Even a stressful few days. My anxiety has been through the roof and the doctors thought I may have an ectopic pregnancy. They took my bloods on Wednesday and it was 725 and they took them again on Friday to see if they doubled and it did to 1700. My friend has said it could be a sign of twins, this has not helped my anxiety at all and I nearly broke down. I have a scan on Wednesday to eee if they can see anything. Do you all think it's normal or could it be twins? 8 feel sick with nerves xxx

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Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 19:29

Sorry, that was 'its been' not 'its.even', my mind is not with it today, so sorry xx

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Givemestrengthorgin · 10/03/2018 19:44

Please try not to be anxious about your anxiety! I felt very anxious when I got a positive result...its that sudden realisation that you are going down that road now and you can't stop it. It's like a runaway train that you can't get off. It will pass but if it doesn't there are people that can support you. You will not be alone to deal with how you are feeling. Your midwife will reassure you that it's common to feel thay way you do.
Are you anxious about anything specific? Try writing down your thoughts. When they are confined to your head they are a big jumble of worry. Write them down and you might be able to see your worries are not as massive or realistic.

Have you had anxiety in the past?

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 19:47

Thank you also for the group, I will join now. I hope you are all well also xxx

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Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 19:51

Thank you. I have had anxiety in the past but this stems back from when I was mugged on my way home from work. I think my main worries are how will I cope, will the anxiety stop, why don't I feel happy after all these years of trying, I'm even more anxious that it will be twins, one baby will be hard enough but twins I think would send me over the edge. Everyone is so happy around me but I can't, I'm just so stressed xx

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KochabRising · 10/03/2018 19:54

Some degree of anxiety is pretty normal during pregnancy. When it starts to take over your life it’s a problem.

You need to talk to your mw and ask what help available. Anxiety often responds very well to talking therapies / CBT type therapies in he short term.

Don’t let this spoil your pregnancy. Get some help now - I suffered from extreme anxiety and OCD after the birth of my son and I wish I’d got help sooner. The therapy I had (more psychotherapy type and not NHS) really helped.

HCG level ranges of singletons and twins overlap at all stages so no, it’s not necessarily an indication of twins.

If it is twins, you will deal with it. Whatever happens, you will deal with it. Sometimes the worrying and waiting is worse than the event if you see what I mean?

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 20:01

Thank you, you are right. I have booked in to talk to someone and I have spoken to the doctor at the hospital and the midwife so hopefully they will be able to help. I am pumped full of hormones at the moment, I have just finished two rounds of clomid and that's still in my system, I now have the pregnancy hormones surging. I also have a cyst on my right ovary (pics and the output of the first round of clomid) so that prob don't help either. I think I will be ok once I have a scan on Wednesday, seeing something and having confirmation of how many is in there... just want to know now. Thank you so much for reinserting me that higher levels can be normal for a single baby also, had a good day yesterday after I got the results and she said that today and it's set me off again xx

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Bonge · 10/03/2018 20:07

Please be kind to yourself, how you're feeling is completely natural. You had 2 years of infertility and now that you're finally pregnant, you're probably in shock and worried about the baby already. That's our natural instinct.

Best to talk to the doctor though. Best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy x

KochabRising · 10/03/2018 20:11

I am pumped full of hormones at the moment, I have just finished two rounds of clomid and that's still in my system, I now have the pregnancy hormones surging. I also have a cyst on my right ovary (pics and the output of the first round of clomid) so that prob don't help either.

Go easy on yourself! The hormones in pregnancy can be a bit of a shock. You’re really swirling with the buggers right now, it’s not wonder you’re feeing all at sea.

Definitely talk to your midwife - get this nipped in the bud early on.

If it helps at all, I have a friend who suffered almost psychosis levels of anxiety through her pregnancy. She got treatment, everything worked out brilliantly and she has a happy healthy bright little boy and she’s totally fine. Some women do find pregnancy triggers this extreme anxiety. For me it came post birth. It’s a lot more common than is publicised and help is out there.

Be kind to yourself - acknowledge it’s not you going crazy, it’s hormonally driven. Talk to your mw and post on here and talk to people in RL if you need support.

You WILL be ok.

Original poster

Helsbells218 · 10/03/2018 20:15

Thank you so much and so sorry for my spelling tonight, I'm all over the place xx you have all helped loads, thank you so much. I will keep reaching out to the doctors and the midwifes. The clomid, pregnancy hormones and the PCOS/cysts are not helping xxx

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