Working after pregnancy

[CRZ1988]

Hi ladies,

I'm in a bit of a predicament. I'm in fairly early pregnancy but having to look at my maternity leave choices and back to work information to try and get my head around things before I leave it too late and don't understand anything.

Basically, I'm after some advice. I currently work in the Civil Service as admin support alongside the military for a large number of Officers. I've done this job for about 4 years now and I really love it. Don't get me wrong, there's some days when its so dull and there's nothing going on and it bores me to tears but the good outweighs the bad vastly.

I always thought I'd want to quit work when I had children. My main reasoning for this is, the way I was raised with a mother who went back to work fairly early on, and the way my husband was raised with a mother who stayed off work til he went to secondary school and his sister was established in primary school. They are all so so close and I love it. My parents and I really aren't that close and I don't blame my mother for it, my dad made her go back to work, he couldn't stand her being at home all day.

I'm by no means a career woman, I've done this sort of work for 10 years and its never really fulfilled me (I'm a crafty kind of girl, sitting behind a desk doesn't work for me....) I know I'm contradicting myself....

I have the option to resign upon taking maternity leave if I want to, it's just a tick in a box....

Anyway. What did you do? Were you happy with your choice? If not, why not.

@ClareB83 what do you mean not entitled?

My role currently has very high level of responsibility and I know I won't feel comfortable going into another role with a lower of responsibility.

Just that. They don't have to hold the same job open for you if you stay off after the first six months of maternity leave, they just have to offer you an equivalent job.

Check your intranet as it'll probably be on there. It's also here www.gov.uk/employee-rights-when-on-leave

I gave up my jobs with both of my two previous pregnancies. I went back to work part time when each of them reached 2.
My eldest is now nearly 16 and my youngest is almost 10.
The 3 of us are so very close. I have always talked to them like people.
I don't talk down to them. And I always make time for them.
They are the best well behave little people I know.
My eldest's friends think i'm great as not like normal mum's as so relaxed and calm.
I don't think it matters if you work or not. It's about making time for your little people and ma king them feel that they matter.

Is probably worth checking if you can come back to your current job not just an equivalent role at same grade. I’m civil service in a similar environment and have been told the policy changed slightly since my last baby (6years ago) so am not automatically entitled to return to my current role after maternity leave and also have to work 3 months not 1 to pay back the maternity package

That's the case Clare if for some reason the OPs original job as changed in some way whilst she has been away, The would just have to offer an equivalent, They would have to have a very good reason not to offer the original job back if it still existed exactly as it was after 6 months.

My mum was a SAHM (she wasn't forced or anything like that - she just didn't have great job opportunities so figured she might as well stay home) and I absolutely hated it as a child - all of my friends' mothers worked, so I thought there was something wrong with me, that I was a "bad child" somehow. Other kids would talk about their parents' jobs, and then ask me what my mum did all day. My best friend's mum was a mailwoman, and I was so jealous of her!

To be honest, it made me feel like I had "ruined my mum's life" (she never said anything to me along those lines, in fact she had decided to stop working even before I was conceived due to being fed up with the kind of jobs that were available to her ) and as far as I remember I always thought I would never inflict that upon a child. I am going back full-time after 3 months, when my husband will take 3 months paternity leave. We really want to have the same amount of time at home with the baby.

I know the guidance says "strong" reason eg job has changed. But between the constant reorgs, internal guidance and experience I wouldn't expect to come back to exactly the same job. In my last department you came back to a job of the same level but always a different subject matter. Perhaps for OP that might just mean managing a different group of officers, but worth being aware.

Also my place is the same as @PenguinChristmas, you have to do three months.

I'd wait and see how you feel once the baby is born tbh. I thought I'd love mat leave but some days I feel very isolated and am desperate for a bit of adult conversation. Much as I love time with my daughter I couldn't do this full time, and that's ok.

The 3 month rule is a recent change so I’d check that with HR. Our maternity policy states the person is entitled to a role at the same role profile / grade but not their specific assignment. This is a change from how it was handled in the past