Weekend away with a newborn

[PassTheAfterEights]

Grateful for any and all advice please!

DFIL has a big b'day this year and has arranged for big group of all nearest and dearest to go away for the weekend, with various events throughout. Plan is for DH and I to stay w PIL's and BIL under the same roof and billet everyone else incl my DP's nearby.

Problem is, they don't yet know we're a few weeks upduffed with DC1, due to land 3 weeks prior (we didn't know when it was all organised either just in case anyone thinks this is churlish!!).

Still hoping & praying all goes to plan but, if it does, is this realistic or insane? Do people go away for the weekend with 3/2 week olds (DC might/prob will be late)? Can they go on long car journeys? Will we be able to do anything or just shellshocked and coping with parenthood? Will it ruin it for everyone else? Is it even feasible after difficult birth (I think e.g. it takes a few days post- a C section before you're up and about properly?)?

Sorry I am green and clueless, working on that - just trying to work out whether it would affect our participation and therefore timescales for sharing the news. FIL has also asked me to help organise and between current energy levels and impending major international house move feeling a bit whelmed, but - again - hard to get out of right now!

Thanks in advance.

It could go either way really. I went to a wedding when my DD was six weeks old, I was maid of honor and we were there for two nights in the hotel. My parents were there two which made it a little easier, but I was breastfeeding, tired and hormones were still a little iffy. I couldn't have done it two weeks post birth as I was struggling with feeding at that point and beyond exhausted and sore.

I was readmitted to hospital a week post partum with a serious infection. I couldn't have gone anywhere. My case was fairly extreme but 2-3 weeks is too close to the birth IMHO. Also - how far along are you? Have you had your first scan and are you sure of your dates? Your EDD could well be adjusted by a week or so.

Every family is different but I am absolutely sure that in this situation both my parents and my PILs would rather reschedule than risk their grandchild not being there.

MN legends THANKS - so helpful and feel a lot calmer about it just reading through. We have just told DPIL's and they are fine with us hedging our bets, they're very practical and relaxed, and now v excited. Sadly too much booked and paid for to postpone but if all stars align and with my DP's around we might get lucky. Will hope for the best and plan for the worst, if we don't get down there we don't.

Much obliged for all kind responses and good sense!(because I can't IRL).

I think you've made a good choice. Just see how it goes. My first was 3 weeks early (37 weeks), so when she was 6 weeks (3 weeks after my due date), my mum and stepdad came to visit (not staying with us, they were in a holiday cottage in our village as we didn't have a proper guestroom at that point). We weren't away but spending every day with them and we had dinner with them days (an early dinner though!). That was fine. But we were done by about 7pm every night and they didn't mind and just went home. I would have been overwhelmed an exhausted if we'd been expected to stay up longer than that. We did go away to visit family when our dd was about 8 weeks though and that was fine, but again, we were in bed early.

But definitely when she was 2/3 weeks old, there is no way we could have gone away. She had feeding issues and we only got out of the hospital at 7 days old and I was completely overwhelmed and we were having near daily appts with midwives, health visitors, GPs, etc. to monitor her. I would NOT have wanted to be away then. So a few weeks can make a huge difference.

Just see what happens and take a laid back approach to it and see how you feel. It's totally fine to give it a miss though and you'll be back doing those sorts of things soon once you get the hang of it all.