Hiding a pregnancy on a night out?!

[coffeeforone]

It’s very early days and I haven’t told anyone. My close friends our mums have arranged a get together next weekend to celebrate one of the mum’s 65th birthday. I’m really looking forward to it, however I need to be able to pretend to drink and hide the fact that I’m not drinking from them all. I usually enjoy alcohol and ‘let my hair down’ with them so I’m afraid they’ll guess something’s up. Last time I was 5 weeks PG and went out I made the excuse I had a terrible hangover and so I’m only having a couple. I made a glass of processo last the whole evening until one of my close friends just blurted ‘your pregnant aren’t you!” And I couldn’t keep a straight face - turns out they had chatted whilst I was in the loo and were all certain! I don’t want the same to happen again especially with my mum present it would be awful if this is how she finds out. Any tips on how to pretend to drink? I would never be able to say I’m not drinking as they’ll guess straight away - the usual anti-biotics/driving etc won’t work with my friends. We have 10 little ones between 5 of us and all the excuses have been used before - we know each other really well!! So I need to pretend to drink - how do I do that without being caught??

OP, they’re all going to guess. Do the driving and dry January thing but have an non-lie answer ready for when they ask you outright, because they will. I used to say ‘please don’t ask me that question right now’. They will understand that you are preg but that you are not willing to discuss it yet.

Text day before crying off due to food poisoning (up all night feel dreadful etc..). Text again next morning to say symptoms gone feeling a bit fragile but you will be able to make it after all. No one will ask why you are not drinking because no-one wants to hear about your illness

Thanks everyone! I think I just need to be more prepared if they do guess!

If I drive there for any reason they will think I’m PG. (they know me really well and I would never drive if there’s alcohol on offer, and I have Zero willpower for things like Dry Jan - they know that too!)

I think I really need to pretend to sip drinks and hope they don’t notice...!

Thanks Chillimum! That might work! Though one of our friends claimed food poisoning the day before a wedding reception once when she was PG with her first, we all guessed by the way she ‘planted the seed’ about the dodgy tummy in advance, so will need to be careful if I do do that!!

Or I could just not take the risk and give them a heads up beforehand ‘I’m not drinking tonight, please please don’t mention it or ask me why in front of my mum’

Do that, OP. Some people really delight in being the first to spot a pregnancy. You aren’t going to be able to hide it.

Actually, that sounds like the best idea op. It sounds like you would have to work really hard to hide it so you might as well just be honest and then they can pretend with you.

I have the exact same problem. Literally just found out I'm pregnant with my first and very early on so don't want to tell anyone yet. I have my best friends birthday night out next weekend. We don't go out much any more so usually make the most of it when we do. I think I'll just have mocktails and pretend they contain alcohol or get a coke and pretend it has vodka in. Hopefully no one guesses.

Or I could just not take the risk and give them a heads up beforehand ‘I’m not drinking tonight, please please don’t mention it or ask me why in front of my mum’

I honestly think this is the best idea. Excuses about antibiotics are the most obvious thing ever, and it's tough to come up with reasons when everyone knows you'd normally be first to the bar! I had this problem too - I'm known for my love of a pint but I was really, really paranoid about people guessing because I have a history of miscarriage and so really didn't want anyone knowing before I felt more confident. To be honest I just didn't really go out in the first trimester - I felt a bit shit, and because it was Christmas it was so hard to come up with excuses (who drives to a Christmas party if they don't have to?!).

Some kind of fasting blood test in the morning so you can't drink?

I’m pretending to do Dry January (nearly 9 wks) and it’s hell pretending that I’d ever intentionally turn down alchohol for the sake of a fad- so not me! But luckily my partner is doing it with me (and he’s actually not had one sip this month), so it’s easier making out that it’s a “couple thing”. If you can get your man to do it too it really helps cement things.

Could you say your ttc

Do you have one friend you can tell? I was that friend on a birthday weekend away in Dublin and we managed to do it between us so I ended up drinking hers. It worked. But she was also a spirit drinker so we could work the whole 'vodka' and coke thing quite well too.
I think it'd be easier to have someone that can work with you and drink yours.

Any excuse you come up with, people will know or at least suspect. You need to pretend you are drinking. This is much easier with a couple of friends on side, who you can buy rounds with.

Confide in a couple of (not pregnant) friends. Between three of you monopolising the ordering of the rounds no one will twig if a mate takes one for the team and swaps a near empty glass every so often

It’s really easy if your DH is there. You just do a drink swapping routine – get two drinks DH drinks half you switch classes you make a trip to the loo. Then two glasses of wine are gone and you haven’t drunk anything.

You can also do this at a party. Just keep switching the people you’re talking to and occasionally lose your glass of wine on the table to put down the loo to put down the kitchen sink when no one is watching.

When in the pub With a couple of friends it is a little more difficult- I Would try and avoid the situation.