Baby Shower?

[ZoetobeMum]

I am after a bit of advice... after being pursuaded to have a baby shower by my partner, my mum and my friend i have agreed to it.

I haven't had a very easy pregnancy as we got told at 21 weeks to expect to lose the baby. I am currently 33 weeks pregnant now and having the baby at 36 weeks through a planned section.

The baby has a critical heart problem and is expected to have Downs Syndrome so quite alot for me to get my head around.

The idea of the baby shower is to put some fun back into the pregnancy and actually remember i am still having a baby that we will all cherish and love in a couple of weeks.

I am just unsure on the etiquette of who do you invite to the shower. I figured keeping it small was best, but is it acceptable to invite kids or should i say no children considering everything incase i struggle to hold it together? It is happening at home as i couldn't face the idea of going anywhere.

I figure if people want to bring their children they will regardless anyway.

The only person I know who has had a baby shower recently it was women-only at her house, they played games and had like an afternoon tea type thing and was all quite chill although I couldn't attend as was living in a different city at the time so wasn't practical. There were no children present but only a few people had very young babies/toddlers anyway. I don't really know about the etiquette as baby showers are an American thing that we seem to have imported only quite recently. I would just say do whatever you want tbh it's your event!

It’s generally no children, except Pre-schoolers, mainly because most I have been to are done during a work day (which also necessarily cuts down on people who can attend!)

I recently had one.
Very casual, afternoon tea at my mums with close family and friends (female only)
Opened presents, chatted etc was really lovely x

Another one saying afternoon tea type food at home or relatives house, all the women friends/family and simple games like celebrity babies and a sweepstake on the birth weight etc. Non-cringe and a really nice girls afternoon

Hiya. Congratulations on your pregnancy! My daughter Lily is now 2 and she has down syndrome and had heart conditions. She is our first baby. I had her at 37+5 and she came out screaming lol. Lily had a heart condition called full AVSD. She had open heart surgery at the Royal Brompton hospital. She is now a thriving 2 year old and doing amazingly well. I just wanted to give you some reassurance. In regards to baby shower I didn't have one but have been to lots and every one is different. Some have children there, others are adult only. Do what ever you feel is right for you. Try and enjoy it and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy. There are lots of different Facebook pages for parents with children who have heart conditions and also for parents who a child with down syndrome. The is a site called positive about down syndrome which shows the stories of families. If your little one does have ds you may find this useful. Best wishes xxxx

Congratulations on your pregnancy and sorry you’re having some extra worry. I may be a bit late in responding and you might have worked out what you’re doing by now. If not there’s a couple of things I’d say - make plans that you would for any baby accepting that they might need changing at short notice. It’s worth contacting dhg.org.uk/ for support re your baby’s possible heart condition. Their words were invaluable to me when my daughter was born with DS, 8 weeks early and with a heart defect (AVSD) requiring surgery at 6 months. Also worth contacting your local DS support group even before baby born as you will find many people who will get behind you and your family should you want that. I should add that I’ll be attending my daughter’s first parent evening next week. I know every story is different but she had a difficult start too and the care she received was amazing. I regret now not having the memories of baby showers etc (although at the time it felt too much so I totally get your worries) Please PM me if I can be of any help or if you need. Wishing you and your little one all the very best!

Your baby shower, your rules.

But, as a general rule and of the ones I've been to in the past, they tend to be women only, some small babies or young kids.

Either a small buffet or afternoon tea style and some fun games but nothing too full on.

It's really just a nice excuse for you to see friends and family before the madness begins and may be especially nice for you as it sounds like you may be particularly busy after your little one's birth as you'll need to recover and sounds like baby may be needing special care straight away too.

Good luck with everything! Wishing you and baby a safe delivery and recovery