DSS is going to be a big brother

[stepmummynowrealmummy]

Hi! I found out yesterday I am 4 ish weeks pregnant with my 1st baby. I have a 6 year old SS who will be 7 when my baby is born. Does anyone have any experience with children and this age difference? I know it isn't much but I've always been anxious about him being used to being an only child. And any advice on how to tell him? I'd like to make it special. He lives with me full time, his mother passed away a long time ago and he does see me as a motherly figure, not just his "step mum" so we will all be a close family unit. He is desperate for a sibling, he is always saying he wants there to be a baby in my tummy so I am so excited for him. Thanks xxx

We told DSD after the 12 week scan and she was absolutely thrilled. She'll be a month shy of 8 when baby arrives and is very excited. We have a different set up to you in that she lives with her Mum and we only see her at weekends so she won't be living with the baby full time. I'm not overly concerned about the age gap as there is 6.5 years between me and my sister and we're best mates, plus I know siblings who are 12 months apart and can't bear each other so it depends much more on personality than it does in age.

What has really helped DSD bond with the baby is the usual - being told all the important jobs I'll need her help with when baby arrives, fun things she can do with the baby like choose it's outfits, help push the pram and read it stories. She also loves my Ovia app and the different objects she can compare baby to size-wise each week. I once had to take her to Sainsbury's so she could hold a bok choi to visualise exactly how big the baby was that week. It also gives us a lot of laughs - at 25 weeks I currently have a baseball glove in my tummy which she finds hilarious. I've taken lots of books out of the library for her about baby development, what it's like to have a new baby in the house etc which we enjoyed reading together etc. So far, we seem to have made it a very positive thing for her by including her as much as possible and talking to her about things in an age appropriate yet mature way.

Good luck but I'm sure you won't need it. It sounds like your DSS will be over the moon!

There is a 7 year age gap between my DD and my DS.
We involved my daughter in mostly everything, from the shopping, decorating, Scans , and made sure she felt involved rather than pushed aside throughout the process!
She chose herself not to like to feel him kick as she didn't personally like it, but she loved the scan (we paid for a private sexing one) and being able to chose some clothes and colour of his room.
She is now 8 and he's 18months, and they have a fantastic bond.
In the beginning weeks of him being born, she did become a bit quieter, as she didn't understand why I would be up in the night with him etc without her, and why I would be spending so much time with him without her, but now she realises why and she's marvellous!

Goodluck with the pregnancy