12 week scan fear

[AKP79]

2 years ago today we discovered we had had a missed miscarriage at our 12 week scan. We then went on to have another MMC discovered at a 12 week scan the following May.

I’m now pregnant again, our 12 week scan is on 27th Dec and I’m petrified. I don’t have any pregnancy symptoms any more and I don’t feel pregnant.

I’m not sure how we are going to have the courage to walk through those doors to the scan room. My husband took the previous MMCs hard, i have a DS (age 6) from a previous relationship and he is the best step dad I know.

Does anyone who has been through this have any tips for us?

I haven't had a MMC but I do think everyone worries before a scan so you'll be in a room full of nervous people.

Also try not to worry about the no symptoms thing. Mine really wound down around 11 weeks and both babies were absolutely fine.

Thank you for the reassurances ClareB83.

I’ve not had any symptoms for a good couple of weeks now, but I realise this can also be normal sometimes.

Absolutely. I had very few symptoms weeks 1-7 and from 11 despite being pregnant with twins and apparently twice the hormones. It can be totally normal.

I had a MMC with my first pregnancy and was absolutely petrified about the 12 week scan for my second so can imagine how hard it must be going after two MMC. Sorry no tips really - just having support there. Hopefully the hospital will have read your notes and be supportive. My mum didn't have any symptoms with her pregnancies (4) so it can be normal. My second turned out to be twins so the main shock was that and when they started looking for a third! Good luck.

I felt like this after having a mmc of twins in March and a second mc in May. The 12 week scan for this pregnancy was the most scared I've ever been! Here's what I found helped:

1. My midwife put a note for my sonographer saying I was anxious due to a previous mmc and I also told her I was worried the second I walked through the door. She was sensitive and understanding, she quietly checked her screen first before turning on the screen for us to see and immediately reassuring us there was a heartbeat.

2. I managed to give myself a firm talking to the night before where I rationalised even if the worst had happened, then we'd get through it. After all, I'd got through it twice before and yes, it was awful but I survived and I'd survive again. Worrying about it was making no difference to the outcome and if the baby was ok, getting a good night's sleep was going to be more beneficial than a night of raised cortisol levels!

3. Once lying on the table, I took slow, deep breaths, closed my eyes and counted until the midwife spoke, repeating that I could deal with this.

Everything turned out fine! After two losses, no tests and changing nothing, this baby stuck. I'm 24+2 now and finally feel I'm enjoying the pregnancy. I wish you all the best and hope this is it for you. Remember, you can do this, whatever the outcome x

Thank you @emvy this is wonderful advice. I hadn’t thought about asking them to switch the projection screen off, but I think I will def do that. It’s projected onto the ceiling above your head.

I don’t think my midwife has made any notes so when I arrive I’m going to let them know how nervous I am. Im not good with hospitals, my DS had meningitis as a baby and was given 24 hours in which to pull through. Fortunately he did, but when it comes to pregnancy and babies, hospitals are very anxiety enduring for me.

*enducing!

So had my scan today, told them how nervous I was and they were all wonderful. Best bit... I’m 11w 3days, we saw a heart beat and a healthy baby!

Aw congratulations!!

Thank you x

I opened this thread as I know the feeling well.. read to the end and I'm so happy for you!!! I've just noticed your username and we used to be on the same ttc after miscarriage thread 😀 i was cheekychicken$$$ - I mc in jan 16 and July 16 but thankfully I've been blessed with a baby boy now and he is 9 months.

Amazing news!!!

Congrats OP!

So, so pleased for you AKP79! Congratulations x

Congratulations OP - also feeling the same about when I have my scan.

Oh emvy, I’m so so happy to see your pregnancy is going well. What a beautiful scan photo and a gorgeous baby. Congratulations! Wonderful news. I remember you from previous threads and I’d feel the same having had my mmc at my 12 week scan just over a year ago.

Your news has given me hope. Wishing you a healthy uneventful successful happy pregnancy.

Thank you Anne. I agree it's a beautiful scan photo but it's AKP79 baby scan picture not mine

I'm sorry I disappeared off the ttc after loss thread. When I fell pregnant I hung around for ages as I was afraid to jinx things and then suddenly felt like I was being thoughtless being on the thread still so dropped out. I did plan on popping back when the baby is the born to try to give some hope to others, so I'm really pleased that I've been able to provide some to you - there really IS hope, although it can be so hard to cling on to. I wish you all the best and I hope to see you sticking around on the pregnancy boards x

Congratulations x

Thank you so much everyone for the replies, they've really touched me. We have another scan next week for measurements so I'm feeling anxious again now, but nowhere near what I was.

Sorry for the slow response - I had a bit of a Christmas/ New Year digital detox.

Hi all,
First time messaging on here.
I had trouble conceiving found out I had PCOS when coming off the pill and needed to use clomid to ovulate. Well it happened on the first round of tablets and I’m 12 weeks 6 days! I had an early scan 8 weeks 3 days and saw the heart beat flickering. My next scan is on Tuesday and I’m so anxious! I’m worried I’m going to get there and no baby. I stopped having symptoms 2 weeks ago but my boobs still really hurt.
Can you tell me how soon after they put the probe on your tummy you see the baby? Thank you xxx

Hi LilyWhit - try not to worry because seeing your beans heartbeat at 8 weeks is a really good sign. Don't worry about loss of symptoms, I lost mine a couple of weeks before the scan (above). We'd never had a successful 12 week scan because we'd had consecutive missed miscarriages, so I was very anxious about the whole thing. I actually asked that they turned the screen off until they were sure everything was ok. It was probably about 20 seconds between her putting the probe on me, finding a heartbeat and switching the screen on.

Hi AkP79
Thanks so much for your response.
I’m so sorry to hear you’ve had MC you poor thing.
I don’t want to seem insensitive but could I ask what a missed miscarriage is??? I’ve not heard of that before?
When’s your little one due? Xx

A missed miscarriage is when you don't spontaneously miscarry (start bleeding and passing the fetus), so we got to our scans at 12 weeks to find that our babies on both occasions had actually passed at 8 and 10 weeks. However, my body was still acting as though I was pregnant. From what I know, it's quite unusual to have missed miscarriages and more so to have two in a row, so don't start worrying about that happening to you.

Oh gosh you poor thing! So sorry to hear that!
I’ve never heard of that before.
That’s what my fear was to have gone to the scan and they say it’s got no heartbeat but then I reassure myself and think I’ve not had signs of a miscarriage. But as you’ve just said your body can stil think your pregnant!
I’m trying not to be negative.. just desperate for baby to be ok. When are you due? Xxx

It's very unusual for that to happen and more so for it to happen without any prior signs like pain or spotting.

I've got another scan next week to check everything is still ok, but should be due beginning mid July.

Good luck next Tuesday, I'm sure it'll all be fine.