Pregnant with number 4!!

[Mum2410]

I have never posted on here before, I have 3 young kids aged 5,2 and 5month old, I am exclusively breastfeeding so didn’t have a period since post baby, I had a appointment to get the IUD coil fitted, only to find out that am pregnant, this was a total shock to me and my husband, I have been crying with worry ever since I found out, my husband hasn’t been supportive and pushed for a termination as he says I wouldn’t cope with 4 kids so young, he works 12hour shifts and gets one day off in a month so realistically I raise my kids all alone, I do not have any family or friends I can reach out to, my heart wants to kee this baby as I love my kids so much, but my mind knows I wouldn’t cope with 4, my 5 month old still keeps me up every night all night as he is breastfed and just won’t take a bottle even if I tried to express milk, my 2 year old only just started to sleep in her own bed this week, I am a mess and so tired, I booked a appointment with bpas just to kee my husband quiet, we went to the clinic only to find out I am 12weeks gone nearly 13, the nurse said a medical abortion wouldn’t be for me as am too far gone and if I still wanted a termination I would need to book for a surgical, with Christmas and the holidays I could be looking for weeks for a appointment, my husband still pushes to go ahead and book a appointment, I just can’t do it, it’s already a tiny human with a heartbeat, i am torn between the decision as I know by keeping it, I wouldn’t cope and my kids wouldn’t get the attention they deserve with my youngest only being 5 month old, my due date is exactly on my sons first birthday 1st July, I have come round to accepting that I will have this child, as a termination will break me and I would never forgive myself if I did this, I am so scared of what people will think having one so soon after the other, am also so embarrassed making a appointment with my midwife as she will think that am back again, she has been my midwife with my last 2 kids, any advice or help will be so appreciated, how will I cope? How can I tell people? Most importantly my In laws who I assume won’t be too pleased about it! It’s all a mess and am just embarrassed to even get excited or enjoy my pregnancy, how did you mums cope with children so young????

Have your baby. You will cope, you already are coping. It will be horribly tiring but you'll have a wonderful little squad who will sleep eventually and will be great play mates. Far better imo to have a close gap too. Your husband will need time but that's ok. I hope he looks after you.

You will cope. It happened to me on my eldest 2. There is only 11mths between them and now they r 19 and 20 and great friends. Please dont get a termination to please your oh as u will really regret it and as for your inlaws, its u having a baby not them. Take care of yourself xx

Rather than pushing you for a termination he should be looking at how you can cope as a family. I don't like how he says 'you' won't cope when it's his child too! He needs to think of how he could possibly rejig his working hours to help more/pay for more childcare for the older ones/help to get the baby to take a bottle etc. There's stuff you can do to cope you should talk tk your midwife. Don't worry about being embarrassed.