Pregnant and have a 7.5 month old

[peanut2017]

Just found out I'm pregnant which I'm delighted about but am shitting myself. We had two previous losses and I hope everything will be ok.

I had a lot to drink the past week as was visiting my sister and her husband so we had a few glasses of wine every night.

So will have 2 under 16 months - anyone have this and can reassure me that we can manage?

I'm 40 next year so didn't have time to waste and we are lucky it happened so quickly but just feeling a bit anxious.

Back in work end of February and the thoughts of telling them

OMG 😲

Congrats Coffee 😀 it is exciting and scary at the same time. Especially like you said if you don't have much support than that changes things.

Also I have had a great maternity this time and met some nice mothers who will all be back to work and don't think are planning on having another this quickly 😂. It has kept me sane going for walks and coffee with them. Not sure how much outings I will get to do with two.

A couple of the girls have their mothers with them or them with their mothers nearly every day. Another girls in laws and her father mind there baby 3 times a week while they go to fitness / cinema together.

We have been out twice in 8 months for 3 hours during the day.

Awwww Peanut I completely sympathise. I'm exactly the same! Mat leave (take 1) was great as there were people from my NCT group to hang out with a we all went to baby groups together. Now there's nobody and it'll be harder to go to baby groups with a toddler (and nobody seems to actually speak to each other at the groups, so I was grateful for the other NCT girls!).

I also totally understand about not having anyone for the odd babysitting duty (whether it's to go to the gym, go out or just have a day to yourself!). It's really really tough and the lack of 'me time' has certain had an effect on my mental health . BUT I'm hopeful that in a few years it'll be easier having two together and we'll be grateful despite the tough early years . Also, we're both so lucky to actually be able to have a second as it's certainly not something that's guaranteed!

Do you think you'll keep DC1 in childcare for a few days then? If you can afford it, it sounds like it would be really useful. It gives you a little time alone with the baby to help bond/deal with newborn issues (feeding, reflux, all of the other glamorous issues that seem to take up so much time in the early weeks!).

I know it's going to be tough and it can definitely effect your mental health. It's nice to talk to people going through the exact same thing. I think if we can afford it we will keep DS1 in childcare for some of the time to give me time with the new baby and also to keep his place.

What about you? What are you planning? How has your pregnancy being?

I'm just worrying if everything is ok now as I've a lot going of back pain, my boobs aren't really sore and I saw a bit of blood on the tissue paper a few times? Think it was the same on my second loss. Didn't sleep great last night kept going to the toilet to check. Hopefully all will be ok.

You have had some great advice. Wow so many of us in the same position. I am another who is 5 months pregnant and will have a newborn and 16 month old in April.
Congratulations!

This second pregnancy so far has actually been ok. It's been tougher than my first as I obviously have another baby to occupy and I haven't been able to just nap when I need to. However so far it's been ok

If the blood is brown it's usually nothing to worry about. Also if it's red it can all be fine but possibly something to ask your GP. Fingers crossed for you.

I have a 13 month age gap. We're just a month in as the new baby is only a month old, but it's not as hard as I was expecting.

Keep the older one in childcare a day or two a week if you can. It keeps their routine that they're used to so it doesn't seem like everything changes for them because of the new baby. And it means you can get out to do some shopping or go to a baby group, it's much easier to do stuff when you just have one!

Get your house baby proofed and have somewhere safe you can set the older one if you need to for 5 or 10 minutes. We have a playpen so I can set the older one in there while I'm getting the pram out, sorting out the baby etc.

It will make your life easier if the older one is in a good bedtime routine and is sleeping well.

Get a good double pram, I take them out most days if I can for a walk, even if it's a short one.

The later stages of pregnancy were tough for me, I was working 3 days a week and was utterly exhausted, so much more than in my first pregnancy. Be realistic about how much you can take on and take any opportunity to get a rest.

It's all a bit hectic and my house is a mess but everyone is clean, fed and generally happy so that's an achievement!

You'll be absolutely fine. You'll spend most of your time running after your toddler and the baby will just fit in. The baby is the easy one, you'll wonder why you found it so hard with just one the first time round.

Congratulations, it really is lots of fun!

winterwonderlandy what double pram do you have?

I'm looking for something as lightweight as possible as I am only small and seem to have heavy babies!

I'm about to have a 12 and a half month gap between my two little ones. It also absolutely pooping myself about how I'm going to cope, but I just know that I'll manage and 'get on with it' so to speak!

I have an oyster max which we used as a single for the first one, and are now using it as a double. I know some people find it heavy but I find it ok, the only downside I have is that you lose most of the basket space below when I have it as a double.

I also have a second hand out and about nipper which I haven't used yet. I'll see how we get on with it in the new year. I have a feeling that the older one is going to be trying to poke and prod the younger one if they're side by side so it might be a bit of a nightmare!