Buying stuff for first baby - what do you really need and when?

[lalaa]

I'm 20 weeks pregnant and am starting to think about exactly what I'm going to need when my baby arrives. I'm on a tight budget and don't want to buy stuff until I really need to, but I do want to be prepared - don't fancy shopping for pushchairs, baby clothes, etc, etc once the baby is actually here and don't want to leave it so late that I'm just too big to get it all done.

I've read loads of books and magazines and while some of it is helpful, there's not a consistent approach, and I feel like some of them are just on a major selling crusade. My gut feel is that I don't really need all that much for when the baby arrives. I could really do with pointers as to what is crucial and when other people got it all together!

Thanks :-)

dunno if any-one has mentioned but you will need billions of extra-super-de-dooper sanitary towels - don't use maternity ones they are like a mouse's matress. and plenty of cheap knickers you won't feel guilty about throwing out. the paper ones are good if you don't mind rustling when you move. Or and plenty of pack of frozen peas to sit on!!!
I'm still using the babyoil I bulk bought (dd is now 8!!) wish you well and enjoy the good times because they really do go so fast.

Muslin squares, yes, essential. Lots of camera film, and wish I had some video of the early days. 2xchanging mat, for upstairs and downstairs changes. Batteries for the remote control so you can watch rubbish daytime TV when breastfeeding (Trisha was my guilty pleasure).

I don't know if anyone has already mentioned it, but a car seat is a must for coming out of hospital. The best ones are those that you can carry quite easily and preferable have a little rocking action, then you can use it as a daytime chair/cradle at home.

Big knickers are best, briefs just don't keep the towels in place properly and could irritate a scar if you need a section. Sanitary towels with wings are best too because they stay in place better. My hospital gave out Bounty packs with loads of baby toiletries but we were asked to provide baby clothes, nappies, cotton wool etc for whilst we were in.

Everyone has probably said it all but I can't resist.

Disposable knickers, horrible but IMO essential for the first couple of days, everytime you go to the loo you can just throw the whole lot in the bin.

Maternity pads for the first week or so then you can get away with using something a bit thinner.

Breast pads, I use the Johnson & Johnson ones, the cheap supermarket ones give me soggy nipples (not nice).

Kamillosan cream and a savoy cabbage, I ignored my midwife's suggestion to get the savoy cabbage before the engorgement thinking I'll just get it if I need it then had a spend an uncomfortable day waiting for my DH to bring one home from work. For all a cabbage costs have one in the fridge at around day three.

Moses baskets are not essential, I got a nice one this time round second hand (didn't bother with DS1 he went straight in the cot). I wouldn't buy a cot bed if you are thinking of having another child before the first will be finished with the cot bed, you will end up having to buy another one.

Definately agree about buying a new car seat, Mothercare have new ones at a very reasonable price, their own make and Safetybaby, IMO a cheap new one is better than an expensive make second hand, you don't know if it has been in an accident.

Personally think wire framed bouncy chairs are a waste of money, had one for DS1, it was very flimsy and he looked uncomfortable. This time I am using the car seat and a Graco Baby Swing (a bargain just now on Kiddicare.com).

Don't leave yourself short of babygros/vests, but I wouldn't buy newborn, I would imagine most babies would not be too big for 0-3 months. DS2 can go through three babygros/vests in one night (seems to be soaking wet almost every time he wakes for a feed in the night). ASDA are doing packs of seven vests for £8 just now and they have some reasonably priced babygros.

Loads of bibs.

A breast pump, if b/f, although I have not yet expressed a bottle I found that this time it helped me through a bout of mastitis when I found it too painful to hand express (probably not doing it right mind you) to get DS2 latched on. There are always loads of these for sale in our local paper, most of them either unused or used once (it all gets sterilised anyway).

Some means of sterilising, I believe cold water is cheapest but microwave or an electric steam sterliser is much quicker, you'll appreciate how important that is at the time.

Agree with everyone else about the toiletries, you get loads of freebies at the hospital anyway (Bounty packs etc) and I still have stuff left over from DS1 (aged 3.5), don't know what baby oil is for either, I use talc myself but won't put it on either of the kids, I'm afraid however I do have a liking for Johnson & Johnson baby bath, love the smell, but I believe some olive oil in the water is much better for them.

A changing mat, personally do all nappy changing on the floor, they can't fall off the floor. Make sure you have got a travel one for your changing bag also, we have some rather suspect looking mother's rooms in this part of the country and it is peace of mind to be able to use your own mat and you always have it for those park bench/in the car type changes.

Happy baby shopping, it's great fun!

This is the time to get rid of all those greying knickers lurking in the back of your cupboard! Wear 'em once then bin 'em! I ditched my unopened box of breast pads after 12 years - never needed them. A V shaped pillow for bfing and later to prop up baby up is useful. And I loved my coachbult pram. Used it for all four of mine and it's still got plenty of wear in it.

Agree with PamT, I had an emergency section and normal knickers sat right on the wound & hurt like hell. Disposables were much better (or old apple catchers! Ew! )

I hope I'm not goning to be too repetitive...

Muslins. By as many as you think you'll need and then double it.

Maternity pads and disposable knickers. I had a c-section and dh had to change my pads for me. At least I didn't have to give him grotty knickers to wash as well.

Trousers with drawstring waists for when you get home.

A pram/ carrycot combination thingy.

A carseat that you can rock.

"The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley (by it now from Amazon!)

A radio cassette player and a selection of audio books.

Actually I thought you weren't meant to leave a newborn in a carseat for too long (tempting though it may seem!) - a bouncy chair is actually much better for their back as it has a bit of give in it. The adjustable ones lie flat as well - good for rocking them to sleep.

florenceuk - we were worried about leaving dd in her car seat but our g.p., who used to be a hospital paedetrician, said it was okay for short-term use in a baby who, like ours, suffered from reflux and was uncomfortable lying down. He also checked this with a colleuge who specialises in the spine. Dd would scream all night long so dh would take her out in the car until she fell asleep and then bring her indoors so we could get a couple of hours' sleep - any attempt to move her resulted in hysterics. Not ideal but it kept us sane until the reflux went at about 4-5 weeks!

Does this mean I have an excuse to get a new TV (with remote) and a new phone?

I forgot how truly awful disposible pants are, thanks for reminding me folks! They were essentail though, get a larger size than normal as mine were too small last time.

Where do you get those V shaped pillows from? I know they are not essential but I fancy one this time.

You can get the v pillows and covers from Blooming Marvellous - I have one and used it for both kids and they have some great designs!!

You can get washable breast pads from Boots - works out much cheaper and they work a lot better too.

Don't think I've got much to add to this list.

jodee - thanks for the NCT link - very useful

Don't buy breastpads till you see if you need them. I have never leaked at all.

On the contrary, I would say buy a pack of breastpads just in case. I only breastfed with DS1 but leaked loads with DS2 and DD for the first few days. I'd have been drenched if I hadn't taken any breastpads with me.

Where did everyone get their disposable knickers from?? I couldn't fit into a large size from Superdrug, which made me feel like a complete heifer. I'm not that big (size 14 normally - bigger after the baby, obviously) but they cut into me like cheesewire. Had to get dh to go out and buy giant granny knicks from M&S - and he nearly died from horror and embarrassment.

Also, if you buy a snowsuit for your winter baby, don't be put off by the howling when you try to stuff her/him into it. My ds screamed and screamed as we put him in his, then instantly fell asleep when he was in. Think it was a bit like warm, comfy swaddling. Anyway, it was powerfully soporific. I personally would buy a cheap second hand pram with carrycot for first few months, then light unbrella fold buggy for the next stage. Depends on how many stairs you have to negotiate. My ds loved his sling when he was tiny, but felt restricted by it from about four-five months. Cuddly toys for new babies are also a complete waste of money.

I agree with PamT get at least one packet of breast pads, it is awful waking up all wet and sticky, they can also be quite comfy. Thanks for the info on the pillows & reusable breastpads.

muslin squares - absolutely indispensible !

Ask the local florist if they can stagger flower deliveries. Ours offered to do this when it was already too late. The house was full of bouquets, some in saucepans and plastic buckets, we were too busy to keep changing the water and they all died at the same time. We could have had a bouquet a week for months. You could ask the florist to let you know when someone places an order so you can thank them.

eemie you are obviously far more popular than I am.

Eemie - yes !! what a great idea - I was in despair (well everything was very exagggerated just after giving birth !) because I had so many flowers and not enough vases to put them in -it was lovely to be thought of by kind rels and friends,but I was very stressed by having nowhere to put them !

My best advice is not to spend money now but instead check out which supermarkets/shopping centres/malls near you have comfy parents rooms. By the time the baby is a week old you'll want a change of scene and shopping is a great excuse! If there's a comfy place to change and feed (particularly breastfeed) you can enjoy yourself!

Personally, never bought a moses basket, cot was fine from day 1.
Never bought a pram, sling was fine until big enough for push chair.
Couldn't have lived without bath slope and nursing pillow (bought both on first trip out day 4).
Doctor prescribed sudacreme and we've still got 2 large tubs! Haven't even started using the Johnson's baby bath from the bounty pack.
Did rush out and buy infacol for colic in middle of night - it's the only thing you can give from day 1 and it makes you feel better even if not them!
Live yoghurt drink (for you, not them! if breastfeeding) helps colic too.
Lots of bubblebath - it's the only time you get to relax in the first few weeks.
Warm dressing gown - I froze in the middle of the night while breastfeeding at first (you're not really used to sitting with your breasts exposed!).
Deep pile bath mat - somewhere to put baby safely while you go to the loo (we have lino floor in bathrom).

Good luck!

Forgot to mention...

I got through hundreds of breastpads as I leaked like a tap for the full 6 months of breastfeeding (and as result of not changing them enough got thrush in the first week or so), so definitely worth having a pack on hand.

At night I used to stuff a nappy down my top (only way to soak it up!).

Just to add my tuppence worth

I quite agree with the earlier advice 'what to expect in the first year' book was the best thing we bought. DH got it after I got home with the baby but I wished I'd had it in the hospital too to explain some of the side effects that you fear only you are suffering. Midwives try to reassure you but you imagine that they are just being kind until you see that someone else has already written about it in print so they can't just be humouring you! Did that make sense? You don't need to read through it in advance - just look particular stuff up as you need to - there is a section for everything you need to know and a good index.

Tescos for breast pads (with the little nipple dimple too) and BIG paper knickers.

ASDA for baby vests and sleepsuits and BIG pyjamas (I was in hospital a week and seemed to look as pregnant leaving as when I arrived).

chocolate ( for you, not baby)
guiness/sweetheart stout to help with milk production ( who cares if this is a myth?)