Really struggling with food / putting on weight / negative body image. Anyone else?

[NerNerNerNerBATMAN]

I'm 15 weeks pg with second DC. I put on 4 stone in previous pregnancy as I had severe NVP that was only relieved by medication and eating CONSTANTLY. Thankfully I did breastfeed it all off eventually.

It's worse this time though. I've been so ill throughout and again the only thing that helps is eating. I feel like I want to binge/purge but I'm on so many anti sickness tablets that I think it would be impossible to vomit. The nausea is relentless.

I've put on so much weight already and can feel myself wobble in places I shouldn't. I have a large bump but it's mostly a food baby.

Prior to becoming pg again I used to exercise a lot and had much healthier approach to food. I've managed one aqua aerobics class since becoming pg. exercise really helps my mental health but I'm just not well enough. Am considering trying the Davina DVD at home though.

I just feel so low at the moment, and so much of it is related to negative body image/overeating/lack of exercise.

The thing is, I KNOW this will pass. I KNOW I can bf it off again. I KNOW that I just need to do what I can to get through the day. But none of it helps.

I feel like shit.

DH is very reassuring, but I just hate how my body is changing.

Anyone else?

Oh lovely i totally understand how you feel. I myself am in recovery from an eating disorder not otherwise specified (EDNOS, i showed many signs of anorexia however my weight never quite dropped below bmi 18.5 so was not classed as anorexic).
I have always had awful body image issues and restricted my food and over exercised in order to compensate. I gained 1.5 stone in my first pregnancy (preemie at 23 weeks) and the nicu journey sent me spiralling with anxiety, my eating disorder and depression for 3 years, i had only just managed to properly pull myself out without help a month before i concieved this time (half heartedly recovered previously for 9 months but no periods in that time)... i know how you feel, i am high risk for another preemie and have only gained 5lbs at almost 23 weeks. I am below the recomended guidlines and i am having to conquer my weight gain fears fpr the sake of my baby. You can do this too, 9 months is only a short amount of time but makes all the difference to baby! Stay strong x

I'm so totally ready for my non pregnant body it's unreal. And while I lost 16kg because of the sickness it still didn't bring me any closer to my wanted target weight before I got pregnant anyway. For the majority of it I've felt fat rather than pregnant and I still do despite it being a very definite 40 week bump.
That said, I also struggle with the fact that considering how far along I am my bump actually looks fairly small compared to other women and so I still worry that I'm doing soemthing wrong despite my measurements being spot on.
DH is the same as yours and honestly finds me attractive still but it doesn't make me feel any better.
for you Batman have you found any healthy foods you can keep down or is it still a struggle?

Thanks for your replies ladies, and sorry you've both suffered.

Dead I've only recently been able to stomach anything that isn't a beige carbohydrate. I'm on carrot sticks and fruit at the moment, and popcorn is quite a decent low calorie snack so that's been good. It's just the volume I need to eat that's a problem.

It doesn't help that a friend said a while ago that I was a bit chubby after my last pg. She didn't mean to be rude but it has stuck with me and stung a bit

Sorry to hear you've not been well, I was the same with DS1 and it really is just the worst. The nausea just makes everything feel more effort, bless you.

Totally resonate with what you're saying though. Gave birth in Jan, and dipped in and out of slimming world all year, losing a couple of stone but still 3 stone(!) heavier than I would have been pre-baby and fell pregnant again. I'm only 10 weeks and I just feel enormous so god knows how I'm going to feel at 40 weeks - in the heat of summer 🙈 x

I have an enormous bump compared to other women and I've really struggled with negative body image throughout my pregnancy. I swelled up and had a bump from six weeks! Baby is an average size and I've only gained approx. 1lb per week so I don't know why I'm so huge (midwife suggested bloating and water retention could be the cause).

I've always struggled to lose weight so I'm terrified I'll carry the extra pregnancy pounds forever. My thighs and upper arms have gained cellulite and I'm afraid it won't go away after I give birth. Plus I'm getting hideous stretchmarks, as if my body isn't enough of a mess already. It doesn't help that strangers keep telling me how huge I am and other women keep telling me that you never get your figure back after pregnancy. I just keep thinking that I used to be attractive and now my body has been ruined.

DH keeps telling me it's inevitable that your body will change throughout the course of your life - grey hairs, scars, wrinkles, etc. He says I need to stop focusing on what my body used to be like and accept that everything is changing - my lifestyle and my priorities as well as my body. Instead of looking back at what I used to be like, I have to look forward towards who I'm becoming through the transformative experience of pregnancy and motherhood. I'm trying my best but it's such a fast change from being attractive to ugly, I'm finding it very difficult to accept. Sorry not much help but you're not alone in feeling awful.

Oh batman people can say stuff that really does sting can't they!
Have you tried mangoes yet? Quite a few of us HG ladies have found we can keep those down. At least you're slowly getting there. It took me a long time to find things I could eat that were healthy.

Bella my weight goes straight to my thighs and upper arms too. And my back, which is gross. Also had mega stretch marks last time.

Thankfully, the thighs went fine pretty quickly after giving birth and think the arms did too. I definitely have a slightly different shape but it's not a bad one when not pregnant can barely see the stretch marks too thankfully. So there is hope!

Thank you for sharing your stories ladies, I feel less alone. I've admitted to myself that I might be a bit depressed too so am going to speak to my midwife.

Am trying not to be so hard on myself.

Will try the mango Dead, that sounds delicious!