Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Can't work up the courage

15 replies

Hopeful2102 · 02/10/2017 10:51

I feel like i want to go to a counsellor but i can't work up the courage to go. In my teens i was forced to see a psychotherapist because i used to self harm. I remember being forced to sit their while two women tried to probe their way into my head. That experience has always put me off any type of counselling, now i feel like i need someone to talk to but can't work up the courage to go. I've never been good at expressing how i feel verbally.

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 02/10/2017 11:04

What is it that you feel you need to talk about? ... i think possibly this forum could be a good way to start as you wont have to actually face anybody? and you can choose to take advice from who ever you choose to and ignore the others?

Hopeful2102 · 02/10/2017 11:18

I feel like I have lost control of everything, i have a probation meeting at work in a few days & I'm scared how it's going to go. If i lose my job i don't know what I'll do. I have no savings and rent a room in a private house, i have been applying for jobs but feel like i just don't have any motivation. My baby's dad has made my life very complicated with a lot of lies and mind games but I'd be lying if I said that i don't still have feelings for him. I'm scared everything's going to go wrong with my pregnancy, i feel like I'll go to my scan and see no heartbeat. I feel so alone, now more than ever i want my mom. I feel like everyone just looks at me as a screw up.

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 02/10/2017 12:00

Hopeful2102 firstly id say try your best to keep calm (easier said then done i know) ... but focus on things you can be in control of, for example dont focus on your scan showing anything negative because its something that you cant control and will only know once you go for your scan - try and think positive with your baby and do what you can to stay healthy....

A part of staying healthy is not putting too much stress on yourself, put you and your baby first!!!

Your job - do you have any real reason to believe your probation wont go the way you want? have you done anything wrong or not done a good job? ... between now and your meeting just get your head into your work and do the best job you can do

Your babies dad - this is a tough one as i dont know what he has or hasnt done but id say he out of anybody should be supporting you right now, and if he isn't then i wouldn't waste your time, things will be hard as a single parent but not as hard as if you have a liar dragging you down and pulling at your emotions. If he wants to be apart of the babies life he needs to grow up to the task.

I really wouldn't worry about what everybody else thinks of you, i can assure you even the most 'together' people have some sort of dilemma/drama going on in there life - just not everybody lets people know! ...

You only get one life, if you feel things need changing, then change them for the better - if they are things that cant be helped you have to go with the flow and sort out everything in your control!!

I hope your ok, being pregnant can make you very emotional and your hormones are all over the place - i really hope you can see things clearer and that somehow i may have helped.

Hopeful2102 · 02/10/2017 21:33

They've treated me horribly from day one & have tried everything they can to get me out at this point I'm just tired of it.

I'm trying so hard to pick it up and carry on but i can't stop thinking about if my baby is okay it takes over everything.

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 03/10/2017 08:45

How far along are you? ... i think you should maybe book a GP appointment and let them know its causing you alot of stress and worry and that its not good for the baby, an early scan may be something they recommend.

work wise - see how your probabtion meeting goes, if it doesnt go well - go get yourself a better job and one that wont stress you out your whole pregnancy! but i think it might be best to work at this one and then you might be able to eligible for Met leave pay. xx

Hopeful2102 · 03/10/2017 13:41

Went for a scan today, there was no heartbeat

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 03/10/2017 14:44

Im so so sorry Hopeful2102 have they said what the next step is? I had the same thing in July i know its completely heart breaking and you feel like nobody is ever going to understand how you feel because they are not you!

Hopeful2102 · 03/10/2017 14:58

Called my doctor waiting for an appointment with EPU to confirm as the scan was private but my first two scans ot was so easy to see the heartbeat that i dont feel like they're wrong. Bean wasn't even moving around at my last scan the midwife was having to chase it around

OP posts:
Hopeful2102 · 03/10/2017 14:59

Bean was also measuring 9+1 im supposed to be 10+1

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 03/10/2017 15:04

Ok Sad unfortunately i really am not sure what to say, maybe prepare yourself for the worst but stay positive! i really hope your ok ...

0to3SadOnions · 03/10/2017 15:27

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Please take advantage when they offer you counselling - you're already vulnerable and I don't think this is something you can deal with emotionally by yourself.

Hopeful2102 · 03/10/2017 15:30

I just don't understand by the measuring bean would have died last tuesday up until saturday my symptoms were still so strong, in fact stronger than they'd been all through my pregnancy

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 04/10/2017 08:45

Hopeful2102 They will surley scan you again to see whats going on?

Hopeful2102 · 04/10/2017 12:26

Had scan this morning with EPU definitely no heartbeat, got second opinion & everything. Would be lying if i said i wasn't heartbroken

OP posts:
LJFM2B · 04/10/2017 12:53

I am so so sorry!!! Cry and grieve as you need too and as 0to3SadOnions take note of any counselling they offer. Also once your feeling a tiny bit better visit the Miscarriage association website and either call or email a representative from there ... they helped me a bit with more positive stats etc.

Im sorry again! Sad

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread