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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

First midwife appointment

41 replies

Bambi29 · 01/10/2017 19:17

Hi everyone. I'm just looking for some advice. I have my booking in appointment with the midwife on Tuesday. I'm really excited but also really nervous. 13 years ago I first started trying with my ex, it never happened and we were referred for help. I was prescribed Clomid and managed to fall pregnant 3 times but miscarried very early on (literally days after the test). I had a coil fitted to help with heavy periods and it was removed 31st July. I've not had a period since and to be honest I'm amazed I fell pregnant at all, never mind so soon! So far it's been 12 days since I found out and I'm still worried it will end soon. Will the midwife be able to reassure me at all at the first appointment? Sorry for the ramble!

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mummabubs · 02/10/2017 08:15

I had an early scan due to bleeding, but for what it's worth a really early scan won't really help any with knowing how far along you are OP, at least not with any certainty. At 6 weeks and under you wouldn't even necessarily be able to detect a heartbeat so I'm not sure how much reassurance this would provide for you at this stage? In the early days little bean is so tiny that the measurements are done in tenths of a centimetre, so as you can probably imagine a tiny difference (and completely expected difference with human error taken into account) can throw your dates by a week- mine did! So my early scan put me over a week behind what I thought I should be (cue mild panic!) only for it to completely even out when I went for my 12 week scan to pretty close to what I originally thought!

A scan now might provide you with reassurance given your history, but as I said this early on you probably wouldn't see a heartbeat so might not reassure you and is probably why the surgery has said to have one in a couple of weeks. Very early scans aren't something the NHS can really provide unless you have current pain or bleeding. (As others have said, early pregnancy is very understandably nerve-wracking for everyone due to a whole variety of reasons!) Were I in your position I'd be paying for a private scan now if you don't think you can wait the 2 weeks for the NHS one. The receptionist at your GP surgery sounds an utter delight mind (I have one at mine... the other one is lovely but the aforementioned one has zilcho people skills). Be honest about your feelings with your midwife OP but try to respect if they can't get you an early scan on the NHS any sooner as it's likely to be in your best interests to try and wait it out, even though I know it probably doesn't feel like that right now xx

mummabubs · 02/10/2017 08:20

Haha sorry OP, re-read and don't know where I got the 2 week scan wait from... I blame very, very little sleep at the 39 week stage! 🙈 In any event I guess the point I'd still be making is that they might be able to refer you for a scan but I wouldn't expect one any time before 12 weeks unless you develop pain/bleeding and if you can wait a couple of weeks before having a private scan it's much more likely to be reassuring for you than going now when they're unlikely to really be able to tell you what you're hoping to hear x

Original poster

Bambi29 · 02/10/2017 09:00

I was offered to see a repeat miscarriage years ago but at that point everything was so raw I declined and decided it wasn't meant to be and that I wouldn't try again. I'm so scared and worried that I'm beginning to think trying again even after 10 years was a mistake. I haven't slept in two weeks with nerves and I constantly have that knot of worry feeling in my stomach. I'm hoping a chat with the midwife helps. I've spoke to my boyfriend this morning (after yet another sleepless night) and we are going to see about a private scan this week and then check out our options for private just to see if it would make me feel better. It would involve travelling but it might make me feel better?

OP posts:

harrietm87 · 02/10/2017 09:19

OP id recommend just paying for a private scan, maybe next week when you could more sure of expecting a heartbeat, than trying to get one on the NHS. I've had 3 mcs and was being treated by the recurrent mc team, and when I conceived this time I wasn't offered a reassurance scan. Just being worried isn't enough of a reason - everyone is worried in early pregnancy! If you had pain or bleeding it would be a different story. Good luck!

Original poster

Bambi29 · 02/10/2017 09:36

Thank you! My boyfriend says I need to try and stop worrying but like you say, every woman worries at this stage!!

OP posts:

DueNov · 02/10/2017 13:30

Bambi I was a right worrier honestly up until I could feel her kick!!! I couldn't sleep each night before my scan as I thought she might not have a heart beat it was a horrendous time up until 21 weeks really!

DueNov · 02/10/2017 13:31

An they probably would have sent you to a early scan of you previously took the offer for the reoccurring miscarriage clinic but because you didn't I doubt you'd flag up on their system as urgent or priority unfortunately 😔 x

kirinm · 02/10/2017 13:34

You can ask for blood tests if not a scan. They will show if your HCG levels are rising. To be honest, that was pretty reassuring for me.

Original poster

Bambi29 · 02/10/2017 14:20

DueNov I don't think I'll ever stop worrying to be honest. And I'm not a natural worrier either! I'm glad that you do start to worry less as it goes on. I'm just hoping everything's ok crosses fingers
I didn't realise they could "track" with a blood test that's a good option too. I'll need to take the other half with me to catch me when I faint lol

OP posts:

Hill1991 · 02/10/2017 16:28

First tip I would give you is to either not pee before your appointment or drink loads of water as they will want a urine sample and I just peed 10mins before my appointment so had to take it back once I’ve done one also probably a blood test will be done and mainly just form filling but you will get all the useful number that you require and run past any worries that you have they may book you in for an early scan if they think your symptoms are worrying
Hope all goes well for you

GrockleBocs · 02/10/2017 16:34

After 3 consecutive miscarriages and no definite LMP, you might get a scan or a blood test to try and clarify things. Depends on your trust's rules.

Original poster

Bambi29 · 02/10/2017 17:19

Thanks for the tip! I'll make sure I drink plenty :) thanks again everyone!

OP posts:

Original poster

Bambi29 · 04/10/2017 11:18

Didn't make the midwife yesterday, my dad died suddenly in his sleep. It was very unexpected and I spent the day with my mum and sisters. My boyfriend called to explain so they will write out with another appointment. Bless my midwife she posted a card through my door last night, such a kind and thoughtful thing to do x

OP posts:

Hill1991 · 04/10/2017 12:30

So sorry for your loss, hope your doing ok and that’s very nice off the midwife to do, hopefully they re book your appointment for when your feeling up to it

mollifly · 04/10/2017 17:39

So sorry to hear this xx

PossibiliTea · 04/10/2017 17:56

Oh god that is just awful I am so sorry for your loss x wishing you all the best throughout this pregnancy x

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