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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Dh being over anxious about everything I eat and drink.

27 replies

RedBlackberries · 17/09/2017 21:20

While being a bare hypocrite in the process!

So far it's been the fact that I don't really feel like eating in the evenings, that I've taken solpedine (checked with gp), had a glass of wine a week ago, now its diet drinks!

I bought a non alcoholic gin and tonic can (from co op and their rank don't try them) and I didn't realise it was diet. He goes on about how damaging it is and that I shouldn't have it as it causes cancer, whilst he was smoking a joint and drinking a lager . Literally telling me at that point!!

Don't get me started on any cheese, and sitting to close to the fire (not an open one, just a heater).

I know it comes from a good place but seriously FUCK OFF! I went on a long speech about bodily autonomy and me not being an incubator and that shut him up.

Rant over

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

JennyBlueWren · 17/09/2017 21:29

Buy "Expecting Better" and for everything he bothers you with quote to him from the book. It is fantastic to give an insight into the real risks of different foods.
On a more serious note pregnancy is a time when partners can become controlling which can even result in abuse. Stand up to him and be firm. Find all the evidence you can on second hand smoke and the harm that is doing to the baby too.

My DH did start up some nonsense about diet drinks with me recently to which I pointed out that maybe he could cook me some healthy meals which actually involved vegetables (rather than meat and carbs) if he was so concerned about my health.

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 17/09/2017 21:49

Thanks jenny someone else recommend that book so I'll get on eBay! I think I'm owed some nice meals cooked for
Me

OP posts:

shakedown1979 · 18/09/2017 06:59

Dp had a night out on Saturday gone. The next morning he saw a bottle of wine in the recycling and asked me if I'd been drinking whilst he was out. I had to remind him he'd polished it off himself when he got in. I was not impressed with the hypocrisy either.

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 18/09/2017 07:39

Haha! That's funny shake. He must have felt like a idiot!

OP posts:

LoniceraJaponica · 18/09/2017 07:45

So you are pregnant? And your partner thinks it is OK to smoke weed?

YouCantArgueWithStupid · 18/09/2017 07:50

Is it your first pregnancy? My DH was like this with our first no matter how many times I reminded him who was pregnant.

I was 18 weeks pregnant with No2 and had a glass of wine when we went out for the first time this year for our wedding anniversary a few weeks ago. That'll be the last glass of wine I probably have until our next wedding anniversary.

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 18/09/2017 08:02

No it's my second pregnancy and will be my second child. First time around I was a paranoid bunch of nerves about eating or drinking the wrong thing and did everything by the book. I'm way more relaxed this time round and I think he's stuck in my old way of thinking.

loni it is what it is. He's not doing it inside.

OP posts:

AdalindSchade · 18/09/2017 08:03

He needs to shut the fuck up. He's being really controlling. And why cheese fgs?

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 18/09/2017 08:06

Why cheese indeed?! I think because I avoided any cheese I thought was dangerous first time around (including stuff that's fine like mozzerella ) he's stuck on that. My rant to him about bodily autonomy shut him up last night though.

OP posts:

TheDowagerCuntess · 18/09/2017 08:06

You are brave to start this thread OP.

His hypocrisy is indeed astounding.

If he really gives even the tiniest fuck, he'll give up the weed. If he's not prepared to do that (and I'd bet my last dollar he's not, right?), then he need to keep his opinions firmly inside his head.

PourquoiPas · 18/09/2017 08:10

He's telling you diet tonic is bad while smoking a joint in the same room? Is he mad?

Why are you putting up with this?

And why are you letting him smoke drugs in the house when you have a young child and you are pregnant?

Wolfiefan · 18/09/2017 08:12

He's a controlling weed smoker. And you're having a child with him? Run. Far away.

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 18/09/2017 08:15

Not inside! He was on the back step when he said it. I've got a child and I wouldn't have any smoke in the house!

Clutching at straws I'd say it's his way of being supportive after not being to happy to hear I was pregnant. At least he's caring about it now. But fuck that to telling me what I can do with my body!

OP posts:

twattymctwatterson · 18/09/2017 08:19

Have you name changed? I really hope you aren't who I think you are.

CL1982 · 18/09/2017 08:40

OP just a suggestion. Could you suggest to him that for support HE follows a pregnancy diet as well? So doesn't eat or drink anything you can't for moral support....He is most likely cave in a week or two but it's a salutary lesson on practising what you preach?

Also just a warning-I think you need to be careful on whether he touches you for a half hour until after he smokes. I vaguely remember that's mega important for babies and children.... somewhere in my mind!

Oysterbabe · 18/09/2017 08:41

You're far more at risk from the chemicals you're breathing in that are coming off his clothes after smoking even if he was outside. Basically tell him to fuck off.

TiramisuQueenoftheFaeries · 18/09/2017 08:43

You are unfortunately right, twatty

YouCantArgueWithStupid · 18/09/2017 09:04

@twattymctwatterson that was my thoughts too

Anatidae · 18/09/2017 09:07

It doesn't matter if he smokes outside. All the residue on his hands, skin and clothes is toxic. Third hand smoke.

He's a colossal hypocrite and possibly controlling. If you're who I think you are then he really is a knob.

Inthecornerwatchingyoukissher · 18/09/2017 09:17

Yes he is a hypocrite but smoking weed on the back step where it will blow back in the house is not good.

Jellybabie3 · 18/09/2017 09:21

I am intrigued by the comments on here regarding name changes......??

No way i would be happy with this. Not a chance i would hang out with someone smoking weed whilst preg.....outdoor/indoor regardless

Original poster

RedBlackberries · 18/09/2017 09:32

Yes I've namechanged.

It's a good point about the chemicals. He is being hypocritical and I told him. I was reading a thread on here about women's rights when pregnant so I'm armed with a good arguement about my body being no less my body because I'm pregnant.

OP posts:

flippinada · 18/09/2017 09:38

Is this who I think it is? I really hope not.

In any case, he shouldn't be smoking weed full stop and policing your food intake in this way is not on.

Expectingbsbunumber2 · 18/09/2017 09:57

He's the one with the issue here he shouldn't be smoking weed in the place and even more so not around you while being pregnant. I wouldn't be standing for that. Clearly it's making him paranoid.

Mustang27 · 18/09/2017 10:43

Arrgghhh blood has boiled for you. If he was smoking a joint near you seriously that's irresponsible. I'd have rammed it up his arse and went and stayed with someone I didn't want to kill but not before stopping off and buying myself exactly what I wanted to eat when I got there.

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