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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

bracing myself for labour

45 replies

Laurad04 · 17/09/2017 20:43

40 wks and sitting here thinking ... i wonder what hurts more the contractions or pushing the babies head out..? any tips would be great if anyone has any xx

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asongforthelovers · 18/09/2017 19:13

Does pethadine help with pain?

Acorncat · 18/09/2017 21:52

I didn't find the contractions too bad but crowning was awful. I ended up with an episiotomy for both as I just couldn't push their big bloody heads out and they were getting distressed. I'd read about people just letting their body take over and push but it wasn't like that for me. I didn't have any pain relief (except local obviously) but I don't think you usually get much for the pushing stage anyway.

rachrach2 · 18/09/2017 22:21

I had an epidural first time (v long labour and was tired, pain was manageable but I was totally exhausted). Second time it was painful but ok, I didn't need to push until waters went and then it was totally instinctive, I was scared about crowning but it didn't really hurt me and my baby had a big head with both her hands up. My sister said it hurt her but only for a very short time and then quickly over and then baby is here! You can do it, stay calm and listen to the midwife.

boodles101 · 19/09/2017 10:12

Can I ask what may seem like a bit of a silly question here please? Did you all wait until your body was automatically pushing before doing so or did you just start pushing when your midwife told you to? I ask as I ended up with an assisted delivery after hours of pushing that got me nowhere. I only felt my body doing it involuntarily at the last few mins so don't think I was actually quite ready. I'd like to avoid this with any future labour! Thanks

SecretLifeOfSam · 19/09/2017 10:24

I had an epidural so can't really give a reliable opinion bit I'd say contractions.

Either way though OP, it's going to happen no matter what, sorry to be blunt! And when it does, you'll be amazing, anyone who gives birth in my opinion, is amazing!

Good luck!

user1471495191 · 19/09/2017 10:38

Boodles - I felt ready to push at a point when the MWs told me I was still at 8cm (with a lip) dilated. They said it would be another couple of hours. I continued to insist and another MW agreed I could try. When she saw my first push she was obviously impressed and baby was born approx 12mins later...

Original poster

Laurad04 · 19/09/2017 12:56

@user1471495191 12 minutes later, wow. I wonder when they check for dilation it goes on the size of their hands, so you could have actually been 10?

thanks all... i just hope my husband is encouraging and doesnt keep asking "are you ok?"

OP posts:

user1471495191 · 19/09/2017 13:03

I think it depends laura, the pressure of gentle pushing can probably help complete the dilation. My MW coached me really carefully through the pushing phase. Wasn't like you see in films, for me it was like 'a little gentle push...that's it, keep it slow and steady, not too hard, okay, slightly bigger, okay in a minute I want you to stop pushing and wait'

My DH was a star during labour although he refused to really prepare in advance. I just made sure I told him exactly what to do - cold flannel for my head, tracking contractions (he found an app which produced graphs from the data ) and in the end he had to take control of my tens pain relief (as the gas and air made me drunk )

BayLeaves · 19/09/2017 21:12

I felt the urge to push already when I was 6cm. I was later told that was because the baby was pushing into my back creating a horrible feeling of pressure, after a while the baby figured out where the exit was and the true pushing started!

Pushing and crowning were painful but at least in the depths of despair you know the baby is finally on its way out!

Original poster

Laurad04 · 19/09/2017 21:18

@user1471495191 oh thank you for the advice. I've got to call on Thuraday morning to see what time i can go in... i was hoping to have started on my own by then but i don't feel like thats likely to happen. I think babies comes when they're ready, don't they?!

I hope mine is on the day. He is a good man, but is a bit of a joker. My sister has reassured me and said its different circumstances he will be there for you. Sounds like i have no faith in him 😂 i will mention the cold flannel amd timing contractions, thank you .

how are you getting on?

OP posts:

lollipop7 · 20/09/2017 00:36

Contractions.
Pushing is actually a relief because the end is in sight.

I had two very quick induced labours - with two massive pushes per baby - with my children and back to back contractions drip induction being the worst. Relentless.

33 weeks with my third and another induction likely so more fun!

Good luck.

plantsitter · 20/09/2017 16:00

The feeling when crowning stops is the nicest feeling in the world

sunshinestorm · 20/09/2017 22:18

I would say contractions personally.
When I started pushing the midwife who had come in to help tried to take the gas and air off me and I refused. It caused a bit of an argument but the other midwife (who was wonderful and had cared for me through labour) insisted I might be okay with it and I was allowed to keep it. I was so thankful to have it to get me through and I pushed DS out pretty quickly so it didn't impair my ability to get him out!

poppym12 · 20/09/2017 22:30

All of it. The whole 32 sodding hours of it. He'd turned back to back at the last minute so even in my pethidine x2 haze, it hurt. I'd say overall the contractions were worse as he decided to come out with his arm and shoulder up so everything kind of went numb as it ripped.

user1471495191 · 21/09/2017 05:52

Is he here poppy? Congratulations!

EssentialHummus · 21/09/2017 06:30

Crowning hurts, a lot. But its not for long.
Yep. And at that point you are nearly done.

I got to 10cm dilated at home without meaning to, without any medication. I found pushing far harder, because I was exhausted by that point

user1483981877 · 21/09/2017 14:13

I remember reading about the pain of crowning, that it helps just to push into it and get it over with, the quicker you push that baby out, the quicker it's done. That really helped me with my 2nd child as I started to panic about the pain at that point and I suddenly remembered that and just wanted to get it done. It wouldn't have made any difference with my first child though as he got a bit stuck. Good luck OP and I also think that wet flannels are a great idea - they felt like the most amazing comfort when I was hot and bothered!

beansbananas · 21/09/2017 14:42

I had a very long labour as the baby was back to back and got stuck at 9cm dilated for hours. At the time all I could do was slump in the water before the next contraction took over. I would say the contractions pain itself is manageable but when it goes on for days, the exhaustion is what makes it so difficult. In all honesty labour is the most unimaginable pain and nothing can prepare you for it as anything can happen. My advice would be to get lots of rest and try not to over think it, as no matter how hard it is, you will get through it.

Stickaforkinimdone · 21/09/2017 14:54

Contractions are hideous but for me pushing was the best bit! So so satisfying and very do-able, I just started pushing when I got the urge to and 10 mins later he was out with gas and air
Felt like doing the best poo ever!

savagehk · 22/09/2017 12:44

OP if you're still waiting the best thing to do is not focus on it being painful. If you focus on the pain it will be worse as you'll tense up and what you need to be doing is relaxing as far as possible and letting your body do what it needs to do to get the baby out.

Hypnobirthing was fantastic for me, try and think of each contraction being one more contraction closer to your baby.

I didn't feel crowning (oddly) but as soon as I hit transition then pushing (involuntarily, in hindsight) I was having the 'I can't do this' moment. I didn't actually realise that I was pushing until the midwife told me to try not to as she didn't want me to deliver in the ambulance (transfer in from a home birth as there was meconium in my waters, all was fine).

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