Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Confused, sad, lonely and pregnant

6 replies

mummy2b17 · 01/09/2017 10:48

At 44 I currently find myself 6 months pregnant with a relationship in tatters. I have grown up children and never imagined I would be pregnant again but am, with a partner of 3 years. He has always been very guarded emotionally and not what I would describe a warm man but we got along great and had fun. He really wanted a baby and even had a vasectomy reversal. however since I have became pregnant things have gone from bad to worse.

He is no support to me emotionally. Complains that I am always tired and hardly have sex! Says I do nothing for him! We don't live together but he stays at my house most nights and gets dinner cooked, packed lunch for work etc. He is so moody and sulks for days hardly speaking to me. This makes me anxious and sad. My family have noticed his behaviour, and really don't like him.

Last weekend he went out and came home drunk. He was locked out and banging on my door. When I woke up and answered he started verbally abusing me, calling me a fat c**t, dickhead, boring bastard.... Next day he wasn't even sorry and wouldn't apologise. I'm so sad and scared for my future. Am too ashamed to turn to friends as I feel foolish for some reason, perhaps because I got pregnant to this guy.

Its odd but when he's not about, I miss him...then when he's around I resent him. I just want the best for my baby. Is that leaving their daddy or trying harder to make things work?

OP posts:
AnUtterIdiot · 01/09/2017 10:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mummy2b17 · 01/09/2017 11:17

Thank you, perhaps it would be better in relationships yes, I'm not thinking straight. Who do I message to ask please?

OP posts:
AnUtterIdiot · 01/09/2017 11:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

olicat · 01/09/2017 12:22

I just wanted to say I'm really sorry to read about this. A long time ago I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and I can tell you that it doesn't matter whether he's drunk or not, it is NEVER ok for him to speak to you like that and you undoubtedly deserve better. Please don't be afraid to approach friends and family for support, ultimately they will care about you and baby's wellbeing. X

CoffeeAndCupcakes85 · 01/09/2017 13:10

You poor thing. That's awful and he is completely in the wrong. Nobody should ever speak to another person like that (drunk or otherwise), and he certainly shouldn't be speaking to his pregnant girlfriend like that. Please speak to your friends because they will want to be there to support you. Nobody would think badly of you for getting pregnant to this guy.

Please just think about what you and your baby need. It's not for us to tell you what you should or shouldn't do, obviously, but it sounds like this guy will give you no support and will demand too much of you when you need to be focussing on you and your baby.

As for the sex thing...I'm 15 weeks pregnant and haven't done it since we found out and I don't plan on doing it any time soon for a number of reasons (e.g. I feel horrific about my body, I have had bleeding and worry sex will cause a MC (even though I know logically there's no link)). Speaking to a number of pregnant friends, many feel the same way. Whatever your reasons for not wanting to have sex, he should completely respect them. Yes, it may be frustrating for him, but any decent guy will back off and not put you under such pressure.

mummy2b17 · 01/09/2017 13:23

I had a MC last year and had bleeding early on in this pregnancy so I understand your concerns. I haven't withheld sex but it's just not as often as it used to be. But the nastier he comes the less I want it

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page