Can I change midwife?

[MrsPan]

I moved house after my booking in appt at 6 wks with a mw from the hosp I plan to give birth in. Now my mw is from a different hosp. I saw her cover at 18 wks. I have had 2 previous losses at 21 and 9 weeks and I'm a nervous wreck. Her cover really wasn't interested in how I felt.

During my previous rainbow pregnancy I shut myself away and everyone out and was in a terrible way. I never spoke to anyone about this but now I'm recognising feeling the same way again and I feel I owe it to my 2 year old to try and avoid hitting that dark place again.

I got a text from who is meant to be my mw this am cancelling my next appt and telling me to see GP at 25 weeks and see her at 28. I've never even met her. I'm so upset as I just need extra reassurance. I know they are so so busy but I'm worried about my mental health- I'm crying most days and really struggling.

So - can I request to see a midwife from the hosp I want to give birth in even if I live outside of their midwife community catchment?

Any advice gratefully received please

Call the maternity assessment centre/delivery suite at the hospital you will be delivering at and explain. They should give you the number for the midwife coordination service (or whatever your trust calls it) who should sort it out for you. I had to do this as my midwife was fully booked for my later appointments and it was no problem at all.

Sorry you're feeling so anxious I would also consider contacting your health visitor team for support, they normally visit you towards the end of your pregnancy but maybe could check in on you earlier.

I'm sure everything will be fine. Good luck

So sorry for your loses

I would go and see your GP and see if he can refer you for extra visits/additional help.

Call up your maternity department or GP and explain. They will help to switch you to another midwife or allow you to be seen more frequently (despite it being not your 1st pregnancy) - the only issue may be with short staffed-ness if that's why she can't see you.

Beggars can't be choosers. Is there a private midwife in your area that you could use?

@Ttbb You're fucking rude

Thanks for all your advice. I know I'm probably being a bit demanding when the NHS is stretched as much as it is.

I never needed extra Appts with my last pg because I just knew my mw was there if I needed her and that was reassurance enough. This time round I think a lot of unresolved stuff from my first loss is making things very difficult and I just need a little extra reassurance to keep me going!

Beggars can't be choosers. Is there a private midwife in your area that you could use?

Right so the NHS service the OP is perfectly entitled to use isn't doing what it should be, so she should pay for a private MW?

Don't think so.

YANBU OP.

Hi MrsPan , i changed my midwife after contacting my GP as we just clashed TBH. She was very old fashioned and was totally dismissive and against my MW appointment plans (which was basically to not have a membrane sweep which she literally had me in tears over and im far from an emotional person so that took a lot, telling me i needed to have one and i was making wrong decisions for my baby which was hard to hear and so wrong and which of course should of been my decision) and also birth plan which was for the birth to be as natural and calm as possible, to hypnobirth, to have delayed cord clamping (she had never even heard of it so i had to explain what it was and she called it "pointless" and "pathetic new era parenting" which i was horrified at to say the least) to not have any form of pain relief unless i decided otherwise on the day and for it to just basically be as intimate and natural as possible of course unless my DS needed otherwise medical intervention ect. Basically i wanted my baby to be the only important thing and for him to be as happy and comfortable. Cut a long story short She called me a martyr and told me that i was delusional so i called my GP, made a formal complaint about her (which the receptionist then informed me i was not the first to do) and they completely catered to me and changed my midwife immediately and i had a much better one who was far less judgemental and much more newly informed. So what im trying to say after alot of blabbing lol is that if u ever feel uncomfortable or unhappy with your midwife ( and have good reason to ) you can always swap to someone else. Or of course go private if that is possible for you financially ect.
Good luck and i hope my blabbing helps in some way lol.
M x

Call the antenatal clinic at the hospital you are going to give birth in. I'm sure they would be happy to give you an extra appt there if you mention your anxiety.