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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Totally thoughtless prat at work.........................

17 replies

woodpops · 17/07/2004 19:45

When I was pregnant with dd some thoughtless prat that I work with told me at 20 weeks that the pregnacey wasn't yet viable. Bear in mind I'd previously had a misscarrage that he was prefectly aware of as it happened just after I started working in the department. This morning he has announced to another girl in the office who'll be 21 weeks tomorrow that the pregnancey isn't viable. Has he got a brain in that tiny head of his. I really can't believe he's said it to someone else after my reaction when he said it to me. I'm not a violent preson but this bloke really does deserve a smack. You never know it might knock some sence into him!!!!!!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Fio2 · 17/07/2004 19:46

what an arse really he sounds vile

sponge · 17/07/2004 19:49

I'd let him know that if he can't keep his words of wisdom to himself in future then his attachment to his bollocks may no longer be viable .

beansprout · 17/07/2004 19:58

Woodpops - he IS vile. I would ask him why he is telling me this? I hope you and other preg person can support each other (gang up on him).

If you like, tell him Beansprout thinks he is a tosser.

Samcj · 17/07/2004 20:01

You could say, 'well actually they are making advances all the time and so you are wrong to say that. I found that incredibly upsetting when you told me that when I was pregnant, it caused offence and worry. I think you owe the (other) lady an apology, as it is reminding someone at what has been a worrying time that their baby might still die, which is just HORRIBLE. Now P*ss off and stop being such an arse.'
Or something like that.

misdee · 17/07/2004 20:31

can i punch him???

seriously tho, i'm sure iread that a baby was born at 21weeks and survived. tell him, his mothers pregnancy was never viable and she went against all medical advice and still had him. unfortunatly.

(sorry, thats just nasty)

carla · 17/07/2004 20:39

Wasn't it front page in The Telegraph last week? FFS, there's no reasoning with this sort of person. Just ignore him and log on to MN xxx

hmb · 17/07/2004 20:50

Some people can just be so insensitive. I remember an old bag walking into the office that I was working in. At the time I had not long had a m/c and was having treatment for infertility cause by the m/c. Of the three other women in the room one couldn't have children because she had had cancer of the cervix, and one was infertile, the last was a lesbian and didn't want children herself. The old bag's daughter had just had a baby and this woman came into the office and proceeded to lecture us all about how selfish and silly we all were at leaving it too late to have children.

I wanted to kill her

posyhairdresser · 17/07/2004 21:16

You could complain about this to his boss - we have a few policies which would cover this kind of comment where I work.

Some people just will not stop making insensitive remarks, even when they are told how offensive and upsetting they are being.

I have lost count of the number of people who asked me if I was pregnant when I wasn't, and didn't seem remotely embarassed about asking!

posyhairdresser · 17/07/2004 21:18

Or say, how old are you?
35? (Or what ever he answers)
It seems your social skills are not yet viable - how much longer do you think it will be?

Original poster

woodpops · 18/07/2004 00:35

He's a total arse. I bearly talk to him nowadays because of what he said to me. I can still to this day hear him saying it which really winds me up. My boss is perfectly aware of the situation and has done sweet FA about it. I just wish I'd have made more of a deal of it when he said it to me and made an official complaint to personnel. Perhaps then he wouldn't have done the same thing today!!!!! When you're pregnant you read every book going and are perfectly aware of every pregnacey related fact going. You don't need some over educated little prick reminding you of this information. Sorry about the strong language!!!!

OP posts:

Bibiboo · 18/07/2004 12:07

Post his email address on MN and we'll give him some unwanted information about what a sh*tbag he is.

busybee123 · 18/07/2004 12:42

when i had a m/c at 11 weeks, I was distraught....my nan didnt help when she said....' i don't know why you are getting so upset...i mean its not like it was a proper baby yet.....' as far as I am concerned, as soon as you get pregnant, its is a living baby inside you, your child, and very much 'proper'

boudicca · 18/07/2004 12:46

I know what you mean BB123,my sister was the only member of my family at my Ds funeral

busybee123 · 18/07/2004 12:49

oh boudicca i am so sorry.......

boudicca · 18/07/2004 12:54

thank you Bb123,it was a long time ago now,and I haven't looked at his picture for a v.long time now.I how unthinking people can be about mc

busybee123 · 18/07/2004 12:56

you never get over losing a baby do you? but you learnt to live with it. i hate people that think babies are not babies until a certain time......

Original poster

woodpops · 18/07/2004 14:07

You never forgt the babies you loose. I always think about mine on the day it was due. You'd have thought this stupid bloke that I have the pleasure of working with would have a bit more about him as his wife is a GP. But obviously not!!!!

OP posts:

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