Mum to be- mumma guilt!

[amypanth]

Hello to whoever might read this.

I'm new to Mumsnet but I fancied a good ol' chat. I'm a mum to be with 11 weeks to go.
I remind myself everyday how lucky I am to be pregnant and starting the journey of motherhood. However some days, all the changes totally get to me. I start to panic, will I be able to be a mum? Will my body ever get back to normal?
Body image was always a big thing for me and now I just feel super heightened to any change that occurs when I look in the mirror. Does anyone else feel this?
I mean I feel I should be totally embracing my bump but i some days I really struggle to accept that I can't fit into the size 10s ( which I try and remind myself is a temp thing)
I feel guilty as a mother to be that I shouldn't be feeling sad about these changes and should embrace them. But for some silly reason I have days where all I want to do is cry when I look in the mirror.
Woah, sorry to throw such a emotional post out there, I was just wondering if anyone else was feeling the same! Just so I could feel that I wasn't a total oddball!

Thank you for listening to me rant.

Amy x

Hi Amy, it's totally normal! It's a pretty scary thing...not just bodies but our whole lives changing and we can't control it! I could never understand why pregnant women were sensitive about their size and shape... I thought 'you're pregnant, of course you're big' but now having experienced it I realise how important it is to me to be able to look nice and wear the clothes I want. I'm due any day now and can't wait to be a mum most days but still have days where I think noooo I've changed my mind! I'm already thinking about being able to get into my old clothes (hopefully!)

Don't worry it's normal i have gone from a size 10 used to work out about 3 times a week and was happy with my figure to wearing size 14 clothes now 30 weeks. It is depressing but like you say it's only temporary try not to feel too bad. I just eat what I want when I want and I am trying
To enjoy it now rather than stressing all the time about how fat I look and that it will be worth it! X

I've felt exactly like you all the way through this pregnancy. I'm 38+4 now and still struggling with body image even though I have only put weight on the bump. Our spare room has spent the last 9mths covered in clothes because I am not happy how I look in anything I wear. I would love to be able to 'embrace' the changes to my body but instead I have been counting down to meeting my little man and getting my body back.

Whilst it is a miraculous thing growing another human inside of us it it is bloody hard work and it is ok to not love being pregnant (I can't understand how anyone enjoys it!). It doesn't mean you will be any less of a mum when bubs arrives

Hi Amy,

Sorry to hear this, just wanted to reassure you that you are not alone! I think we often give ourselves the most ridiculously hard time and guilt is something we can all relate to, it seems to kick into overdrive with being pregnant!

While we know how lucky we and how much our babies are loved and cherished are it doesn't mean we have to love every moment and aspect or pregnancy (or even motherhood)! It doesn't mean we are bad, it means we are human!

I think we all have times when we feel sad, or worried, or pissed off or unhappy about the way our bodies, relationships and lifestyles are changing beyond our control.

I am sure many many people can relate to body image worries, even though we know we won't look this way forever. Please try and be kind to yourself and cut yourself some slack, you (and your body) are doing an amazing job right now, and you should be very proud of that. There will be plenty of time in the future to work on getting back into shape again (if that is what you want to do) as and when you are ready, but in the mean time please don't be hard on yourself.

Think of what you would say to a friend who felt the same way, but this time say it to yourself

Also wanted to add that I've got 11 weeks to go too - if you want to join in the chat there is a nice thread for October due dates in the Antenatal Clubs section

Thank you so much!
It feels so good to hear what I'm feeling is normal.
You're right, I need to not worry and try and relax about it.
It's only temporary.