Starting on Surrogacy – What to know from IP

[nancydiggs]

Need help! I have been in touch with an agency for surrogacy and they have taken me through the dos and don’ts. After multiple tests, I have passed the standards needed to go for surrogacy. My problem is – the agency has put me through to IPs and they will be contacting me next week. I really do not know what to ask them or discuss with them. This is a first time interview for me. Can anybody help?

Can't help at all I'm afraid Nancy but you might want to ask MumsNet to move your question to the Surrogacy board as I'm sure you'll get lots more replies from people who can help there? 😊

Prepare yourself by dividing your requirements into compartments. The first will be the level of interaction you want with the IPs. They should be available during your pregnancy term to support you in case of any problems. Finance is crucial too. Discuss the mode of payment and the periodicity of installments too. There are no set questions for surrogacy. Let your gut feeling do the talking. And all the best.

While you might want the IP to be closely involved with the birth process at every stage, it might not always be possible unless they are local. You can ask them if they want any specific dietary charts to be followed even though most IPs will leave it to your discretion. Another point is how they want to keep contact with you – phone, mail, video chats or personal visits. The financial part will of course be clearly laid down in the contract so you have nothing there to be clarified.

I say, the financial aspects should be given a lot of thought. This is what creates a lot of stress and worries during a pregnancy term. Ensure that everything is clearly mentioned in the contract. If your IP has some special requirements that cost should also be factored into the contract. Another very important aspect that you should clarify with the IP in the very first meeting is the mode of delivery – at a hospital or at home. These are the decisions that need to be taken well in advance. Good luck!

Thank you all for your suggestions. I now have a clear picture of what I should ask the IP. The fear factor has definitely gone down. Thanks again.