Joint Baby Shower

[Bex15]

I'm pregnant and so is my OH cousin, she's due November and I'm due February. It's both of our first child and we both want a baby shower. In September I will be 16-20 weeks and she will be 30-34 weeks (I think)

A member of my OH family suggested we have a joint baby shower but we both don't want somebody else organising it. We want to do it our selves because we know what we want and because everyone has said they'd attend but they wouldn't arrange it

A colleague of mine said this was selfish and we shouldn't have one at all, she also called it American trash.

We don't want gifts, it's more just to celebrate the births and have a big joint family get together.

What's people's opinions on this?

1. If you don't want gifts, don't call it a baby shower. Because that's what the 'shower' part means.

1. You're not supposed to organise a shower for yourself. Bad manners (grabby).

If you don't want gifts and the babies aren't born, what's the party celebrating? Being pregnant? It's a bit weird, frankly.

Then we shall call it a family gathering

It's celebrating bringing a baby into the world, I'm going to do a gender reveal as well.

People have already said they want to bring gifts but we aren't saying that gifts are a must, it's purely choice. Especially since my side of the family are already buying so much (out of mine and my OH hands)

1. Mumsnet overwhelmingly dislike baby showers (and basically any celebratory event were you might give gifts or money I'm surprised birthdays are allowed....) so you'll get negative responses. In real life, I've found most people are not so objectionable

1. Baby showers are a bit American but they seem to be definately becoming part of UK culture. Almost every first time mum I've known in the last few years have had a shower as standard. It's becoming the norm. I think they're just a bit of fun and they don't bother me. If I don't want to buy a gift, I simply wouldn't go.

1. That said, arranging your own shower would be a bit odd. Probably better if someone else arranges it, and it's usually a surprise for the mum.

1. However what you want isn't a shower. It's just lovely get together to celebrate your pregnancies. A shower implies 'showering with gifts'. Go ahead and organise your celebration (but make it clear if you don't want gifts as some people might think it's expected. Don't call it a shower). Have fun

Cross posted with you. If you wanna do it, go for it. You don't need approval and anyone who objects is welcome to turn down the invitation.

Thank you!

I didn't realise so many people could be against something that I thought was becoming very common!

I definitely agree about the name Baby Shower so we'll change that, I didn't realise how gift orientated it was!