Does anyone 'get' your sickness?

[BlueIsYou]

Some more comments from work today really made me feel bad

I'm 22 weeks, I have been sick all through since I was 6 weeks pregnant.

I keep on getting nagged to take mints by a lady I sit nearby to. I keep saying "Thank you, but I'm really not good with mints and they make me feel more nauseous". She insists I won't try.

Head of Department saw me today and said "Poor thing. Maybe you're not as far along as you thought? Sickness at your stage is odd".

I feel like everyone sees me as a huge drama Queen.

I don't know anyone else who's had bad sickness/HG, only a little nausea and vomiting during first trimester at best.

Most tell me how they never got sick.

If you're terribly sick with this pregnancy, does anyone understand?

We get you. Come and join us

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2956052-Hyperemesis-Support

In real life? No, aside from my DH who has watched me suffer, I don't think anyone who hasn't suffered it really understands what it's like

No, unless you're actually going through it its impossible to imagine. I had 'normal' amounts of sickness with my first two and hg with my current and I was totally unprepared for the severity of it.

I only had mild/normal sickness and even then our lodger was at how much it took out of me.

No one gets it until they've been through it, even mums that have had good pregnancies don't understand how bad the nausea/sickness can get. I was met with suspicion at work too when I'd passed the 12 week mark and had colleagues asking me why I was still sick when I was in my 2nd trimester. Oh, and also FIL telling me he thought I was making it up to get attention.

It eased off for me around 21 weeks but came back in the 3rd trimester, and I've learnt now to just ignore anyone that has "helpful advice" (read "annoying comments about how I can help myself"). No one truly knows what u are going through except for you, so just focus on taking care of yourself.

I understand no one truly knows what it's like but I don't get the ignorance and excuse to just be blase and come up with unhelpful comments?

I wouldn't ask someone with Fibromyalgia if they've tried going to bed earlier, for example.

I wouldn't have dreamed of commenting like some do, even before pregnancy.

I remember fiercely fighting Kate M's corner when my grandmother tried saying she was being precious as she was in hospital for sickness.

And I wasn't even out of school so no babies

I have immense sympathy. I'd rather have pain than that nausea. It is an awful symptom.
13 years later i still remember the unrelenting nausea, vomiting and inability to even sip water at times.
My DP was so worried! I had to stop work (I was a junior doctor then) and stayed in bed. Lost 12 lb.
Don't think friends understand though!!

Only people who'd had HG got it.

I remember talking to a colleague before I'd had HG. She described it but I didn't really get it. Although I said "god that sounds terrible" rather than "try a mint" or other bollocks.

Adelie Maybe I was just more sympathetic before even being pregnant because I hated feeling sick so much.

I have broken my leg before and would rather that than extended nausea.

I have only ever been hungover once for that reason

Have you tried ginger?

Just kidding. I'm going to punch the next person to ask me that.

Lemondrop Haha! The ginger thing used to wind me up so much!

The best line I had was from MIL :

"Remember, you're pregnant, not ill"!!!!

Yeah cos that really helps when you've got your head in the toilet 24/7!!

My sister had HG virtually from day one well into her 3rd trimester. I rang her to ask if she wanted anything from the supermarket... 4 x 2 litre bottle of full sugar lemonade. She survived on lemonade for weeks (only once it had gone flat and it had to be ice cold). If I hadn't seen her I wouldn't have understood. She had to be virtually horizontal until 12 weeks to stop the vomiting. She was hospitalised numerous times.

The poor thing has it again with number 2. So you have my full sympathies. People don't understand at all because luckily most people don't get HG.

@BlueIsYou my friend was sick until she gave birth. She lost weight all the way through her pregnancy because of it. It's very common actually

Ah joojoo, that phrase winds me up no end! Pregnancy is not an illness. HG most definitely is! Seriously, if any non pregnant person threw up for 3-9 months, everyone would be hugely concerned.

My GP said to me that someone with cancer undergoing chemotherapy wouldn't be expected to just get up and carry on (or get stupid comments about trying ginger biscuits), and the symptoms are effectively the same, so any pregnant woman with HG should receive the same understanding from others. Once I explained that to DH he "got it".

OP, please join the HG support thread that Lemon linked to upthread. It was my lifeline through 2 HG pregnancies. The wonderful LucindaE has been hosting the thread for many years, and being able to talk to other sufferers who really do understand makes a huge difference, at least mentally.

Just to mirror what everyone else has said, only when you live it you realise. My first pregnancy I spent 2.5 months in hospital with it (This was admitted, on a drip, the rancid milkshakes then discharged) rinse and repeat for 9 months meant I was in the hospital like my second home. Luckily Kate Middleton was on the news with it so people sort of understood.

The second time I managed to only be in hospital for four weeks total. Each time only feeling better when baby was born.

I did take all the prescribed medication I could but the only thing that provided any ease was resting completely.

I am so sorry you are going through this. The relentless nature is just appalling x

I think understanding has improved a little since the Duchess of Cambridge suffered with it - people have at least heard of HG and a couple of people at work said 'oh, like Kate Middleton' when I got back to work last time.

But mostly people are idiots. My dh pretty much understands... we went whale watching off New England a few years ago and he gets really bad motion sickness and suffered horribly. I asked him how he would feel if he had to be on that whale watching boat for months on end... he looked horrified!

The only way I can make other people understand is by asking them to remember what their worst ever hang over felt like... and then asking them how they would feel if that went on for months. You sometimes get a look of dawning realisation!