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Am I abnormal for not wanting visitors??

4 replies

Johnskymberlina · 09/07/2017 12:31

Hi all,

I apologise if this is in the wrong section?? Anyway me and dh never have any visitors really. Perhaps maybe once or twice every three months?? My grandma and grandad came round on dh's birthday in December 2015, my mum and dad will nip in now and again but they are probably the people one or twice every three months!!! Anyway so my problem (and I've been told I'm abnormal and selfish for this) is I don't want the world and his dog (relatives we don't see for years and years) being bothered and visiting us because of the baby. Am I being irrational?? My mum said but people will bring gifts - not to sound ungrateful but I don't need gifts?? Obviously there is people who we see regularly (not at my house) - my friends, hubbys friends etc that I would say come in and have a cuddle etc. But I don't want everyone acting like flies around [emoji90] - that includes my mum as well. I will have to stay in hospital for a few days so will people just visit me there?? On the plus side our street has permit parking only mon-sat 9-5 so maybe that will keep people away???!!! God I sound awful but just wondered if anyone else has felt like this??? Hubby feels the same way and we hatched a plan that we would hide in the bathroom if we didn't want to answer the door!! Is that evil??

Thanks xxxxx

OP posts:
mysecret321 · 09/07/2017 13:29

I never wanted to see anyone after having my baby, for about two months...they're only little for a short period of time and wanted to take it all in whilst I could...

howdoyouworkthisthing · 10/07/2017 19:06

This might not be a great suggestion and won't be offended if you think it's ridiculous / not for you, but you could potentially organise a naming ceremony / christening / meet the baby party at a local place / pub / somewhere with a bit of space so everyone can meet your new baby at same time instead of people traipsing in and out of your house over course of months. That way also you can say, don't come over we're having a party so come then xx

DuggeeHugs · 10/07/2017 22:58

Some people want to open their home to the world when baby arrives, others want to bunker down in private and enjoy their time without visitors.

Wherever you are on that spectrum is fine - having a baby should never mean you have to be imposed upon by others, relatives or not. Let everyone know what you will be doing and I think your plan of ignoring the door if unwanted guests attempt to visit is fine.

Johnskymberlina · 11/07/2017 08:10

Duggee my mum can't seem to get the idea I don't want anyone though, she's the one pressurising me tbh no one else has mentioned anything!! I'm
Glad other people understand though :)

How do I work this thing that's a good idea actually. We have a local weather spoons just down the road so I might just say everyone to come in there at a certain time or like space them out? Least then if people want food or drink they can have what they want and I don't have to faff about for anyone?? I'm not making it a party or anything though, just come for a cuddle and then leave after an hour!!!

I have epilepsy so my baby will have to be monitored in hospital anyway so I don't really want anyone fussing about anyway especially if I'm sleep deprived etc. Apart from my mum and sister etc I'm talking about extended family??


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