For those who have been through it - what would you change if anything?

[ethelfleda]

Afternoon everyone. I am currently 20 weeks with our first and probably rather naively keep thinking that I still have ages left of the pregnancy and plenty of time to prepare for the birth but in reality... have I?!
I have a couple of pregnancy exercise DVDs that I keep putting off using and I was wondering if the me in 6 months would regret not getting fitter sooner.
So I thought I would ask if anyone had any regrets at all regarding their pregnancy or labour. Is there anything you would have done differently? Started the nursery earlier or ate a better diet? Or would have changed your birthing plan in hindsight?
I guess this is an 'any advice from those that have been there and done that' thread!
Sorry for waffling on

I found the mindfulness exercises to be the most beneficial, which I didn't start until at least 36 weeks, probably should have done that sooner! Just breathing and calming myself. It was very helpful in labour (and even during my eventual cs).

Do some pelvic floor exercises. Nobody ever did too many of these!

Don't worry about all the stuff. We didn't do my son's nursery until he was 6 months old. Chances are they'll be sleeping in your room before then, and they don't really play or need their own space at first. Stuff you need can seem daunting, but shops and the internet still exist post birth. And people buy things for new babies so I was glad I hadn't spent loads on extra clothes.

Good luck! And do those pelvic floor exercises. Seriously!

My biggest regret is not enjoying it more, taking it all in and relaxing. Enjoy being you. Agree with not rushing the nursery and buying too much. DC1 at 7 months won't be leaving our room anytime soon. We have way too many clothes, yes they are super cute but it's wasteful.

I'd forgo the exercise dvd and enjoy it. I stressed about how big I was the whole time and trying to be super organised. A month later I was skinnier than pre pregnancy and overloaded with stuff! With DC2 I'll have a special weekend away with DH again (that's a must if funds allow!) and enjoy it more!

Thanks for your replies
Much appreciated. Have started the pelvic floors but only 10 per day! Maybe I need to up my game!
The exercise thing isn't a weight thing for me, it's more to do with having energy and stamina in the hope that will help with Labour and energy levels with a new born... but I definitely won't beat myself up if I can manage it
And definitely hoping to have a break with DH before the impending arrival!

*can't manage it I meant!

If planning to bf, find all the local support phone nos, bf clinic opening times and so on, print them out or bookmark them IN ADVANCE.

Have addresses, stamps, email addresses etc ready for any thank you cards or birth announcements. Be up to date with other admin, paying bills and so on.

Admin things like that seem trivial but it's so intense afterwards they can suddenly feel insurmountable. I wish I'd done more of them in advance to allow for the overwhelming under siege feeling of the first two or three weeks.

Do not plan any excursions or visitors if you can avoid them.

Yyy to pelvic floor exercises, too.

By the way - the mindfulness thing - is that the same as hypnobirthing?? I have ordered a book and CD but haven't gotten around to using them yet (can you see a pattern emerging??)

Thank you zopper
I hadn't thought of admin stuff!!

I would have kept up fitness levels (not for weight reasons I just got lazy and used pregnancy as an excuse), and I wouldn't have bought our €300 cotbed that turned out to not function with one side off as a cosleeper. Beautiful but useless for a non sleeping velcro/baby toddler.

Hi ethelfleda,

There's a book you might find useful.

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B0713Q795Y/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1498764479&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=Preparing+to+give+birth+for+the+first&dpPl=1&dpID=41ol2vM04nL&ref=plSrch&tag=mumsnetforum-21

Pressed post by error.

Definitely pelvic floor exercises. Series of 10, 3 times a day.

Like others said "try and relax". Was too focused on birth and not enough on what was coming afterwards. Also spent too much on stuff (should really only have bought cheap pram for first 6 months and studier stroller for after that).

Wish I'd gone out for more meals, gone to the cinema or gone awag with DH for the weekend. Sadly we were skint at the time so couldn't. But if you're not then do it!

Get any building work done. I personally disagree with leaving the nursery. We did ours before dd arrived and although it wasn't really used until we moved her into there at 6 months she was an incredibly demanding baby (allergies and silent reflux so didn't sleep and wouldn't be put down) so we just would not have 'done' anything to it except pop a cot in there. Obviously nothing wrong with just a cot if that's what you want.

I planned to get fit and eat less chocolate but neither really happened.

I'm 36 weeks and I'm glad I sorted out most of the baby stuff earlier- pram, cot etc. No way I'd feel like sitting in a car for hours to go to John Lewis/ Babies R Us to look at stuff right now!

I'd also take advantage of the sales, for example John Lewis have lovely packs of sleepsuits reduced in the sale, and Mothercare have a sale on. I use the sales to stock up on vests/sleepsuits.

What I mean by mindfulness is probably pretty similar to hypnobirthing. I never got a prop book or course. I just practiced slowing down my breathing and picturing helpful things and counting. Whatever helps!

One other thing I wish I'd done more of: meal prep! My husband was ace post birth, but he doesn't cook the stuff I like and I was in no state to do anything. I'm 19 weeks pregnant with our second, so will definitely be freezing plenty of mummy and toddler friendly options closer to the due date.

I'm due in a couple of months and have been so anxious about the birth. My friend recommended Hypnobirthing and I have just finished a KG Course. I was totally sceptical about the whole thing before I started, but I now feel like a huge weight has been lifted. I am actually excited to go into labour! I've got lots of practice to keep doing with my partner but so far really enjoying it and feel more empowered every day! It is a lot of mindfulness, but in the course we learnt all about different coping mechanisms in labour and the conditions your body needs to labour most effectively. My OH was dragged along to the course with me to start with, but I think he is enjoying it even more than me as is developing a connection with baby and a clear role as my birthing partner. I was completely naive to the fact that everything I choose to do or have in labour is my choice, and hypnobirthing is teaching us how to make decisions that are best for my and our baby and be aware of all the options so we are prepared for any eventuality. As you can see from my ramble, I am completely taken aback by it, and wish I had started it sooner!
I agree, not started the nursery but doubt baby will be in there for a long while yet!