Feeling a bit deflated after seeing GP

[PainSnail]

So at the weekend, I found out that I'm pregnant with my first! All very exciting, if a little surprising. I made a GP appointment on tuesday to let them know - I'm not sure if that's the done thing but I have a long term health condition that will need careful management during pregnancy, so I figured the sooner I tell the doctor the better.

I guess I caught my GP on a bad day, as I felt like a naughty child by the end of the appointment. I was told off for coming in so early because "in the early days, anything could happen" and then I was asked if my boyfriend wanted the baby too (I am married, and we were trying for a baby). After that she had a look at my notes and asked me when I last saw my specialist, had I discussed this with him, what would his opinion be on the pregnancy etc etc I haven't told him yet but now I'm dreading it.

I wasn't expecting her to congratulate me or anything... but I was so happy when I got a positive test and now I just feel like a silly girl who's caused everyone a problem

I remember this - I knew my doctor for a few years. He knew I'd got married, removed my IUD so that I could get pregnant. I went to see him to say I was pregnant and he asked if I wanted to be referred for an abortion!

Ha! I remember excitedly dashing to my GP when pregnant with my first and he just said "ok, what do you want me to do about it?"

I'm not sure what I expected, midwives (in these parts) won't see you until after 12 weeks, no point apparently.

Disappointing and deflating is a fair description!

I went several times from 7 weeks, was booked 'early' in at 10 wks and miscarried at 11 weeks with my first pregnancy (was bleeding) and was told it was too early - the booking in at 10 weeks seemed a bit reluctant too...... Next time, bled, lots of hmmmmmm booked in and scanned 'early' with hmmmm........

So the last one where I had no bleeding, I went along at 9 weeks and was told I had left it a bit late.......... can't win sometimes

NB this was ages ago so no. weeks not relevant these days.

I went to my gp when I got pregnant two years ago and they said 'ok'.

I asked do you not need to test me to make sure or anything and they said 'no we take your word for it' and sent me on my way and mentioned a booking appointment

My local hospital will accept referrals to midwifery from 5 weeks. Noone wants to know before that. I also have chronic illness and require consultant lead care, but even then I don't actually see a consultant until 16 weeks.

My surgery said I should come and pick up a form, fill it in and return it and then they would refer me to the antenatal team. I was only allowed the form when I thought I was 6 weeks though and had my booking in at 10 weeks

When I found out I was pregnant I said to the receptionist on the phone and she said in that case I would get an appointment for booking in, bloods, urine etc with the midwife by seven weeks. Didn't need to see the gp first.

I made an appointment to register the pregnancy, took an afternoon off work, to be told at the appointment I would need to come back to register the appointment! I said that's why I'm here, he told me he didn't have time, I refused to leave, then I didn't get a midwife appointment until I was 25 weeks!!! First time mum. The midwife, once I got hold of one because I needed mat b form, told me they don't see 2nd time mums until 25 weeks!

Oh god, I think I'd be tempted to change GP if I got that response!

Well I'm glad its not just me!

I appreciate I went early (I'm 5 weeks) but considering I was referred to obstetrics that day and will probably need early scans I don't think I was being too daft? Certainly not as daft as she made me feel anyway!

Oh, that's an awful experience for you. Congratulations! I hope all goes well xxx

I'd have been disappointed with that response.

I know a lot of GPs don't need to see people now and you can self refer, but if you have a health condition that complicates things then it's perfectly reasonable to book in with a GP to discuss.

I think you have to get in fairly early anyway as you should be having your midwife booking appointment by 8 weeks!

I saw my GP at 6 weeks. He knew I was having ovulation blood tests so did shout Congratulations when I told him

Don't let one stroppy GP bring you down. Be excited!

Congrats OP!
I had the exact same experience. Essentially: you're way too eager. He said "it's so early let's see what happens shall we and come back in three weeks" ... I felt just the same as you. Like a bit of a fraud to be honest!! He also gave me totally conflicting advice about the medication I was on for a condition I have and was managing.
When I went back (8wks by that point), a different doc apologised and said I had done the right thing going when I did. He was actually a bit concerned about time ticking on, as they like to book you in at hosp before 9 weeks to take bloods etc., so I had to do a expedited referral. All a bit of a muddle to be honest.
But once I was in the system at the hospital, everything seemed to get into more of a rhythm.
Don't be deterred - see your consultant, persevere with the GP and stay positive!! Good luck.

Worth mentioning many hospitals accept self referral now, which eliminates the need for sniffy GP!

Congratulations OP and don't let this take the shine off things for you!

Sorry you've had such a negative experience. I went to my GP fairly early on too (5 weeks ish) and also got the whole 'what do you expect me to do, I don't understand why you've come - go and see the midwife' treatment! I was a bit cross as I had only gone to the GP after reading this on the NHS website:

"When you first learn that you're pregnant, get in touch with a midwife or GP as soon as possible. Ideally this should be by 10 weeks of your pregnancy. Telling your GP and/or midwife promptly will help to make sure you receive maternity healthcare that takes into account all your health needs and preferences."
(www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/pages/antenatal-midwife-care-pregnant.aspx)

As it was my first baby I had no idea about self referring to the midwife so I didn't think booking a GP appointment was unreasonable! Oh well, I've learnt my lesson for next time!

I had the same happen. I was told "you're not 10 weeks yet call back then"

I got the no for midwife from GP surgery at 4 and a bit weeks. Booked in at 5 weeks as they had a slot- no 'too early' business here.

Now 37 weeks.

Did see GP about 7 weeks to discuss antidepressants, but otherwise wouldn't have seen them at all

Starting to realise that maternity services are a postcode lottery