How to talk to a pregnant friend

[physicskate]

Hi all, my best friend is about 17 weeks pregnant. She was ttc since October (fell in Feb?).

I'd appreciate some advice on whether or not to talk to her, as I'm struggling with infertility. I've been avoiding her since she told me and I'm worried it's hurting her feelings. She knows we've been ttc since April 2016, but she doesn't know I had a chemical pregnancy just after she would have become pregnant (which is why it's making me so sad, I'm jealous).

I'm thinking it's not fair to put that pressure on her and just finding it about manageable to avoid her.

Thoughts? Opinions? Whose feelings of upset do I ignore? Mine or hers?

I don't think she will understand what it feels like struggling to get pregnant...

Yup she just blurted it out at a dinner with loads of people there... I nearly died... I went home and didn't get out of bed for the rest of the day... yay pity party.

Thanks for the advice!

My friend did this, she completely disconnected during my first pregnancy, and yes, it did hurt not to be able to share that with her...BUT if it was hurting me, how was she feeling? I had total sympathy for her, and after my pregnancy she "came back" and adores dd. I totally understood why she pulled away....

Meant to say that she lost a baby about a year before I concieved, and she was not able to go on and have children.

So sorry to hear this OP

My SIL fell pregnant after me, and we were pregnant together for a little while.

Then I lost DC at 13 weeks. I avoided the family really, and then I fell again.

I'm now 17 weeks, she's 30 weeks.

I would probably still be avoiding her if she was pregnant and I wasn't she shoved the scan picture in my face just after I lost my baby

It does get easier when they're here as babies. I was struggling for a pregnancy for 2 and a bit years before this so far successful pregnancy came along.

I lost DS twins at 15.5 weeks too, whilst my cousin popped out her 5th baby.

Hang on in there. Tell her your true feelings