Casual remark by sonographer

[2bfather]

At our 20 week scan today I asked the sonographer if she knew what the gender was (though we didn't necessarily want her to tell us). Her exact words were... welli thought I saw something... but I'd have to take a closer look. We were a bit out of appointment time so we said no thanks. But we are now intrigued by what she may have meant! Is "something" most likely to be a penis??

Just had 20 week scan yesterday, and we wanted to find out. Sonographer said straight up it's definitely a girl and here are the specific parts to prove it. It wasn't just lack of penis!

With my DS she actually took longer to identify he was a boy, but I assume it depends on their position. I wouldn't read anything into her words to be honest!

Interesting. Thanks!

I think she was such an experienced sonographer that she would have recognised a girl just as easily as a boy and "something" could be a girl.

It's not that simple - baby bits are sometimes very clear but other times quite ambiguous- it's not as easy as seeing a structure and saying 'yup, penis.' Baby girls can have quite enlarged genitalia for example. Ds was coy at his 20 weekend but we knew he was a boy. No preference, just curious

Even very good sonographers can get it wrong.

You are right about the fascinating stuff though. We had an early scan at 8 weeks and you could see the chambers of the heart. Later you could see ventricles in the brain... all sorts of stuff, mind blowing!

anatidae it's incredible the detail isn't it?! Actually couldn't believe what we were seeing. Neither of us had ever seen scan pics before so it was pretty awesome!

I have one daughter and am pregnant with my second. We wanted to know both times and on both occasions the somographer said she she'd seen something then went back to the area to show us the three distinct lines. So I really don't think it is a clue!

This is really interesting as we aren't sure about finding out the sex this time. In previous pregnancies (my youngest is 7) they had their screen and then turned it round for us when it was ok for us to look. But since we had DS they've added fancy wall-mounted TVs which are linked to the ultrasound, so it's all streamed onto the wall and you can see everything. So if it's THAT obvious like with Em's DS :o I don't see how we can NOT find out?! I would like a surprise really, as this is our last baby and we found out with DD and DS. But now DD is absolutely desperate to find out if it's a brother or a sister so we may end up asking anyway.

I think we just want the "authentic" experience of the revelation coming right at the moment of birth. I'm also itching to know though!

When having dd who is 6, we did want to know the sex if possible and the sonographer said that she could see " a cheeseburger " that's what she said described the look of a little girls genitals from the side. I was gobsmacked!!

So it is sounding equally possible that when our sonographer said "I thought I saw something", it could have been a girl thing, or a cheeseburger

!!! Yes

Oh, I'm probably wrong / lying about the bit in my scan reports (yes, 3 20 week scans as 3 pregnancies) where is said "genitals : normal". I don't have my maternity notes now as you give them back once you have had the baby. In our area any way. Guess what? Some hospitals do things slightly differently. But no. Definitely not possible that my babies' genitals were checked for normal development at scans checking for developmental anomalies.

One thing I would say, if you don't mind me butting in, is that if you think you do have a preference one way or another (which is totally normal - loads of people think oooh I'd love a girl first etc) it is probably worth considering finding out if you do have another scan - I know people who have been absolutely convinced it's one, and then were disappointed when baby was born the opposite. I am really glad I found out with DD as I was convinced it was a boy. If I'd gone 20 more weeks convinced, I'm not sure how I would've felt if she was born and it turned out I was wrong, IYSWIM?

Sorry I hope my post wasn't rude - obviously everyone is different!

cag I was convinced ds was a girl. Absolutely convinced. Everyone else though thought boy. I'm not disappointed, I had visions of me and my girl doing girly things together - dresses and spas and nails and ballet etc. But am just so happy baby boy is healthy and seemingly happy the way he's wiggling about.

Can't wait to meet him. And get on with learning about sports. And showing him how amazing things are. 😀 Dh is happy he's a boy. He's relieved he won't have to deal with periods or french plaits

Really I'm open to whatever he or she is so it's not a problem. I'm really mulling this over as a form of displacement. If the sonographer had in fact revealed the answer accidentally then I would be slightly disappointed but I won't be disappointed if it's a boy or a girl. That's just a detail.

I was absolutely desperate for a girl after two boys and knew this would be my last pregnancy. Our area had a policy of not sexing babies. I would have sold my soul to know one way or another. I asked at my 20 week scan and the sonographer said 'well, three boys would be nice'. I took it that meant it was a boy. I chose a name, swallowed my disappointment etc. When the baby was born i had a C section under general anaesthetic as I am very squeamish. I came round to seeing my husband holding a baby and saying 'Its a girl'. I passed out again (morrphine) after saying 'don't talk rubbish, of course it's not'. It took me days to accept I had a daughter. I was delighted, but it would have been so much better if I had been told at the scan. Never believe hints is my advice.

I find it bizarre that they refuse in some areas.

Em I can't do french plaits at all :o

I had a brief "oh. It's not a boy." moment after that scan, and was a little sad I admit, because I was convinced it was a little boy and I'd got used to the idea. But it was brief, and by the time we headed to mum's workplace a couple of hours later to tell her I was all IT'S A GIRL!!! YAY! :) It's just that (for me, again everyone is different!) I wonder if I'd waited and had longer thinking it was a boy, I'm not sure what I would've felt. It wasn't even about not being a boy, I think it would've been exactly the same with the sexes reversed. :)

I wanted a private scan - but we couldn't afford it and didn't know how to organise one anyway.

Hi,
I am in exactly the same position @2bfather

I really want to know the sex and my partner doesn't so we went with not finding out. Baby was in a really difficult position for the sonographer to scan the brain and I kept saying 'Oh it's bound to be a boy if it's being difficult!'
I then thought I saw a pair of balls on the scan, but no penis. Are they that visable??!

As the sonographer continued to scan she said 'come on little man'

My partner and I are now confused as to if she let it slip or of she was just playing on what I was saying as i kept saying it's bound to be a boy!

What's everyone's views on this?

Gosh that is quite annoying. I'm surprised if you can see balls and maybe little man was just a casual remark, meant to be generic, better than Little person. But I don't know. My sonographer was extremely experienced and could see clear definitions on the screen st points I couldn't even make out a human being. Others may be able to help you. You and I are indeed in the same situation: one person who doesn't want to know realistically must veto (hesitate to say trump these days!) the other one. Not fair!!

When I was pregnant we didn't want to find out, but as soon as the sonographer checked the genitals she started saying 'he' Cheers for that! Had no desire to know with him, but with DS2 I was desperate to know and I said 'It's a boy!" even before the sonographer had focussed, it was so obvious.

Could it ever be so obvious with a girl

How long have you got to wait @2bfather till baby is due? Maybe you could convince partner that you really want to find out and that the sonographers comment is driving you mad and pay for a scan?? We are debating it now!