Handed my notice at work this morning, found out I'm pregnant this evening...

[Newhere123]

Hello everyone,

Could really need some advice..

So, hubby and I have been ttc for few months now, but I never expected this..

I have accepted a job offer this morning and this evening, randomly decided to take a pregnancy test( my period is due in 2-3 days) and test came back positive, and the one after as well ..

The timing of it... is just unbelieveable. I have been wanting to change jobs for some time as quite unhappy at my current job and if anything- I felt this would hold us back ttc, I must have misunderstood the maternity pay entitlement, thinking all I needed was 6 months with the same employer, so I would be covered anyway- but I honestly didn't think it would happen this soon, not that I am not thrilled! I guess you can never plan everything, I'm trying to tell myself this must have happen for a reason....

The new job is with higher pay, and my probation period is 3 months. I have also started my notice period today, which is 1.5/2 months, this will be confirmed at the beginning of next week. All goes well- I should be 4.5/ months pregnant after probation period..

Has anyone experienced a similar situation? How and when do you tell a new employer you are pregnant so early on?

Thanks xx

Name change ..thanks got your help, much appreciated. I thought as much but people saying not to send original. Thanks again San send off now xx

Congratulations! This happened with my colleague at work - told her line manager on the day she started!

With regards to benefits on maternity leave, we really struggled when my husband lost his job at this time when I was off. Despite only being on SMP at this point, we didn't qualify for any help as my actual salary is too high. We survived on mortgage holiday, extended overdrafts and credit cards for a bit. So, it all depends on your combined salary.

So.. I've been to see the GP yesterday, after taking 3 positive pregnancy tests, I was given some information of what to do and what to expect in the next few weeks, with scans coming up around week 8-10 and week 12, I also read more information on the NHS website.

My question is- how do I now count my pregnancy weeks? The GP took the date of my last period, which was 25th March, and so does the NHS due date only calculator to calculate the number weeks of pregnancy- surely it can't be 4? More like 2, since ovulation? And what does that mean in relation to my scans? Are those counted (from NHS perspective of scheduling them) from date of last period or date of ovulation? I was told to chase the referal letter up if it doesn't arrive in time as it could get lost in post ..

Thanks and happy weekend everyone!

Pregnancy is counted from the date of your LMP (last menstrual period) so yes you are officially 4 weeks pregnant even though you technically ovulated and conceived just 2 weeks ago. Your 12 week scan will be 12 weeks after your LMP.

Yes to the above, then at the 12 week scan they measure something to give you your estimated due date EDD and everything from then is counted as weeks before your EDD.

As a mother I felt happy for you reading your post - congratulations.
As an employer running a small business, I did since a bit. Everyone knows these things can't be helped or planned and the employers do have to suck it up, but it's still a sore one when your carefully selected new recruit disappears and you have to start all over again with maternity cover(and hope it doesn't happen to her too!)

Wince, even.

Hello again,

Just had a thought today and I hope this doesn't sound too strange.

I did mention in my previous posts that I'm fairly new in the UK,
moved here to be with my husband and still settling in and getting used to everything..! The thing that I miss the most, unfortunately, are my family and friends back home :(

At 33 (34 this year), it's quite hard to make new friends, and especially with not being able to share my amazing news and with all hope it will go OK- go through the pregnancy with no girl mate/s..

So I thought I'd try this out- and I promise that I'm very much a normal girl, I work in finance so like to think I'm a bit intelligent and into doing normal things really.. :) I would l just love to have a girly talk once in a while!

I live in Surrey, so who's ever in the area and didn't get scared by this message.. would be great to hear back :)

Thanks x

Hi Newhere

Moving to a new area is hard, a new country is even harder! Where did you move from?

Just some ideas on how to meet people. Even if someone is not new to an area, most first time mums are looking to make other new mum friends so you'll probably find they are as keen to make friends as you are

Lots of people have made good friends through NCT classes. They're not cheap but worth looking into. I've signed up primarily to try and meet people.

There are also a few apps for this sort of thing. I haven't tried them but I know of Mush and Peanut. I think there's one called Mummy Meet or something similar?

Which part of Surrey are you in? I'm not a million miles from NE Surrey (I'm near Richmond) but I don't drive so not much good for places further out like Guildford

You will make loads of new friends as a parent if you get involved with stuff and even during pregnancy you can do nct, pregnancy yoga/Pilates etc to meet other expecting mums. Have a look on Mumsnet Local as well.

Hi OP, you've already been given some great suggestions for meeting people in real life, but I was wondering if you'd also be interested in joining the January 2018 thread? It's a Mumsnet antenatal club for women whose babies are due in January (which I'm guessing is when yours will be due).

Hi,

Thanks for the comment! Will look into you suggestions, appreciate it..

I was never much of a shy person, though moving to a different country def push it more.. just thought I'd try it, nothing to lose I guess

I actually live not far from you- I live in Epsom!

And thank you mimiholls as well- will have a look at the local link!

Namechange30- will join the group- thank you!

Need another advice..

I still have another 4 weeks with my current employer, before I start my new job. I had an early scan last Friday which showed a tiny bean with a heartbeat :)

Problem I have now is- sickness... I've been feeling quite crap in the last few days, waves of nausea just coming at me. I have taken a sick day on Friday- all I said was I was feeling sick.

How should I deal with it now? I would prefer to avoid telling them that I'm pregnant, but for them to understand any sick days I am taking because of pregnancy sickness.. I need them to actually know I am pregnant. I could possibly just get away with telling my direct manager (he is a man, his wife is due with their first baby in Sept) without telling everyone else..?

The new employer hasn't requested any references from me (yet?), but what if he will? I know it would be extremely immoral for my current employer to say anything about my pregnancy to the new employer- but can they actually do that?

It could be that I'm just worried foolishly about this, I just want to do what's right but to protect my rights, as well as have a fresh positive start at my new job, as I know I will need to prove myself in the first few months.

Any advice would be very appreciated..

I'm in a similar situation, am two weeks away from the end of my probation in a new job and currently 7 weeks pregnant. The sickness has hurt in full force and coming to work is currently a major struggle....but I'm waiting until at least after I've past it before I say anything just incase. My advice is book some holiday if you can or just breathe through it- they ethically can't tell your new employer anything but I wouldn't take the risk. When are you planning to tell the new job?

Hi @ERog84, I ended up telling my manager as we had a chat and he asked how I'm feeling today after being off on Friday- I'm terrible with keeping things :/ It wasn't so bad in the end- he was happy for me, didn't mention anything about the new job or asking questions and said he will be discrete, which I trust he will.. he left it withme to decide if and when I decide to share with the others.

With the new employer- not sure how I'll handle it, on the one hand I would like to wait till after the 3 months probationary period, so I could also prove myself at the new role. But on the other hand.. it could be a bit cheeky to wait till right after (I should be about 24 weeks..?) plus- I will likely to need time off for midwife/scan appointments and so will need them to know my situation..

So awkward but oh well.. what type of jobe do you do? Is this your first pregnancy?

Good morning ladies, hope you are all well!

So wanted to give some updates following my original post....

I have started my new job last Wednesday, my 12 weeks scan (which should actually be when I'm 13+1 as baby measure bit bigger after the appointment was scheduled) is in a week and a half from today..

I was thinking of waiting till the end of my probation period before I say anything, but that's only in 3 months time- and I'm already stating to show a little- not sure I can wait that long, plus- I like the company, so far, they seem quite chilled and nice- I want to do the right thing, especially as I would like to return after my maternity leave... so was thinking to wait till my scan next week and then tell them- all in a positive attitude, no apologies but just to look to see how we can make it all work- I'm lucky that I can do my job using a laptop from anywhere- assuming they will allow it, as and when...

Any tips as to how to approach this?

Thanks... x