A 3rd child after 2 boys

[horokania]

Hi ladies, I would love some advice/support about whether to try for a third baby. Is any one in the same boat?

My husband is on board with the idea on the whole, the main reason being that we both come from big 4 children families. But on my side, there is also a secret desire to try for a girl as well, as I did have some feelings of gender disappointment about not having a daughter after my two little boys were born. I kinda hate myself for wanting a girl so badly.
I'm a bit scared about whether I'm lying to myself when I tell myself I would be happy with potentially 3 boys or even if it might mean I want to try for a 4th if the 3rd is a boy.

Please be kind. I do realise I am lucky to be able to have any children at all and my boys are so sweet and make me so happy. But I am hoping for some support and guidance from people who might be in the same situation. Thanks

I have two boys and am now expecting my third. I'be had so many people asking if I'd like a girl and I have the same diplomatic reply that I regurgitate each time I'm asked. However, if I'm being deeply honest, then yes - I would like a girl. That of course is me being completely selfish and as a family of 4 (soon to be 5) then I need to look at the bigger picture. The two boys I already have would love a Brother and to see them all grow up so close in age and sharing interests would be a joy to watch. My Husband would also be more comfortable with a boy I think, as in he knows what he's doing. Having a girl would terrify him initially! Whatever happens though, there are amazing positives to be drawn rather than feeling any disappointment. We are going to find out the sex this time (didn't with the boys) but I think for my own sanity I need to find out whether or not I will ever have a girl. If not, then I'll have 4 more months to get over it and look forward to a crazy house of 3 boys. I'd hate to think the first day I hold my 3rd and last child was tinged with any kind of disappointment so for me, finding out is the best way. Good luck, and like pp has said any baby is amazing and a blessing so go for it!!

Good luck Theknittinggorilla - I totally get what you're saying.

I don't think we'll go for a 3rd really, in an ideal world yes but the further away I get from the baby days, the less I want to return, even though both babies were great eaters/sleepers etc. I adored the baby days but now I've reclaimed my body, my social life, my boobs, my wardrobe etc. I'm less inclined to go back to it.

I gave myself until 38 to make the decision which I'll be in October this year. That's my cut off - after that, no more.

But in my head, with my mythical 3rd son, it's 20 years down the line, I've turned into an Italian matriarch (despite not being Italian) and I'm in my big kitchen surrounded by tall, strapping young men, fussing over them and feeding them spaghetti whilst they argue, and tease each other and put each other in headlocks.

In reality it would probably be more Sons of Anarchy and I'll have a bottle of Jack in one hand, cigarette in the other and lipstick on my teeth but still...

I'm in the same boat! Two beautiful and much much adored DSs. DS1 is nearly 5 and DS2 is nearly 1 (both March babies). I'm 38 so am constantly weighing up whether to try again for one last baby. If we do I need to be totally happy with it being a boy. And while I DO want a daughter, I'm also sure I'd be thrilled to be having another boy.
If DS2 had been a girl I doubt I'd be mulling over having a third baby, although I've kind of always wanted 3 as I'm from a family of 3 siblings.

I'm so torn though. I have to decide fast due to my age and I just don't know if I could handle a toddler and a newborn (plus DS1 obviously!)
I've enjoyed the gap between them as it's made things easier IMO.
Argh!
Do you have a time limit by which you think you'd like to decide by?

I've had 4 boys and am now finally expecting my baby girl over the next few weeks. Always wanted 2boys and a girl but the Almighty had other plans for me lol mainly to drive me nuts with the boys lol. Although we weren't trying for another baby this one decided to pop along and keep me company.

Hubby is ecstatic he nearly fell off the chair when they told us it's a girl he couldn't believe it and I let out a scream and started crying I couldn't control the overwhelming emotions.
Just under 7 weeks to go and I will be holding my precious bundle. Don't get me wrong I love my boys to bits and wouldn't change anything its just so precious having a girl after so many boys and I'm sure it would be vice versa if I had all girls and finally expecting a boy 💞

Hi ladies,
My husband wants a 3rd baby (we have 2 boys, 7 and 3) and I'm desperate for a girl however I don't feel i want another child. I'm 29 and feel we are getting our sh*t together. Works good, moneys stable and we don't really want for anything, not sure I'm ready to change that. But if we don't have another now (to stop the age gap getting too big) will I regret it in 5 years time causes think I would. My brother has 3 boys and my sis in law has 3 boys so I know theres no chance of us having a girl but is it worth the risk of living with 'what if?' im really struggling with this.
Any advice would be amazing xx

It’s likely a combination of wanting a girl and also wanting a bigger family because that’s what you grew up with .

Even if you had a third boy or even a fourth you would love them as much as ever anyway .

A pp mentioned not finding out the gender . I didn’t find out the gender with my DS and it was the greatest thing ever . I always thought I wanted a girl but when he was put in my arms and my husband told me it was a boy , gender literally didn't matter . I was so in love .

Gender is 50/50, consider the fact that you might end up with another boy so you might feel the same disappointment. I had 2 boys and then had a little girl, when I found out my second was a boy I was a little sad, but soon got over it because my oldest had a little brother to play with! And as soon as I held him I knew he was ment to be, i couldnt of imagined him any different. When I was pregnant the 3rd time I couldnt care less if the baby was a girl or boy because of how perfect my 2 sons where together, but shes a girl and at 18 months old absolutely runs this house lol! I'm now pregnant with another little boy due in august so I kind of feel sorry for her lol!

Keep going back and forth about baby NE3

I have two beautiful boys 10 and 2. I keep going back and forth about having baby number 3. My partner really wants a little girl. And tbh I would too, but I also like idea of 3 boys.

A dunno maybe just the pressure am putting on myself as don't want disappoint people, special as my partner wants a girl

We have 2 DS and a surprise 3rd pregnancy. I did the NIPT as I'm over 35 this time and it came back girl. I always always wanted a girl, but when I found out I was pregnant I completely resigned myself to another DS. I was absolutely shocked when I read the results. I can't really believe it yet, and have read a lot of online reports about NIPT being wrong, so I a, not letting myself think about it until I can have a scan in a few weeks to confirm.
I actually wish we had never found out now, as, had I found out at 20 weeks it was a boy, I would've ben totally fine as had come to terms with it. Now if the NIPT is wrong and it's a boy I will be devastated, having had weeks to think I'm having a girl!

We debated having a 3rd, I have 2 boys ages 5&4 and when I got pregnant we were all secretly hoping for a girl. But if baby was a boy then I'd be OK with it but my partner really wanted a girl and said if its a boy then we'd try again lol. Baby is a girl so it can happen but I would of been happy with another boy in the end.