Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

I don't fucking know DH!

22 replies

Peopleplease · 13/12/2016 11:13

Second baby. I'm 38+4. In general DH has been great but he's started asking me questions I just can't answer and I'm ready to scream at him. I'm - especially this year - go with the flow, he likes concrete plans.

I'm due the 23rd of December. We're having Christmas at our house (crazy but weirdly logical). He keeps asking me if I have any inkling if I'll go on my due date. I don't fucking know.
Will I be hormonal like with DD1. I don't fucking know.
Will I have trouble getting breastfeeding going like with DD1. I don't fucking know.
Will I feel up to him going to work for 2 short days (if I go on time baby would be about a week old). I don't fucking know!!!!

Also it's our first time doing Christmas dinner and it will all be in him so he wants his parents round quite a bit to help and it's all about recreating THEIR Christmas. Nothing about us building traditions for our family. Him and FIL think they're going to be here till late Christmas night. I know MIL will side with me if I really want them to fuck off. If I need to rest I can go to the bedroom apparently!

And breathe! Sorry for the rant. I needed to get it out somewhere.

OP posts:

Thanks

Share

Report

Bella1985 · 13/12/2016 12:22

Oh peopleplease I'm sorry but your post made me chuckle a bit because it sums up perfectly the annoyances of this last stage of pregnancy! I hear you sista!

I'm due on the 30th (first baby) and we're hosting xmas at ours too but instead of DH asking me stupid questions it's DSis - she's bringing her MIL with her DP to Xmas dinner and doesn't really see how weird it could be if I start the early phase of labour whilst they're all here!

Hope you're feeling a bit better after letting it all out! Your poor DH is obviously trying to mentally prepare for the birth but his questions must be so annoying!! Have some and stay calm

Thanks

chloechloe · 13/12/2016 12:35

Hey peopleplease! I'm due on Boxing Day and we're having PiL over too so it would be a big help if you could let me know when my baby will come !

Oh you poor thing, I have a lot of sympathy! My DH is not so bad - but his brother asked if he can stay over on Boxing Day with wife and our two nephews (complete terrors) as we live on route from his PiL and they'll be traveling back then. DH said of course! They're family and welcome to stay any time

I've also had my brother ask what I'm "doing for Xmas" as he'd like to come over after visiting his GF's parents nearby. He hasn't visited me in the 6 years I've lived here and now he wants to come over.

I think it's men that preg head affects the most!

Thanks

peggyundercrackers · 13/12/2016 12:56

your doing Christmas day at your house and making dinner but are due on the 23rd? your absolutely bonkers! there is nothing logical about that at all!

Thanks

Princesspinkgirl · 13/12/2016 13:21

Congratulations I'm due Christmas day!!
If baby not here were going out for a traditional Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve I refuse to cook or entertain and Christmas day we've booked an Indian restaurant again depending on this baby

Thanks

EvenTheWind · 13/12/2016 13:55

I don't normally agree with Peggy but this plan makes no sense.

Can you just not do Xmas this year? If you are overdue or early and feel up to it, you could pop round to local relatives for a cuppa, but I would cancel all plans TBH

Thanks

Bella1985 · 13/12/2016 14:22

Can you just not do Xmas this year?

Whaaaat?! No! Why would they cancel Xmas on account of something that could but could not happen...how grim would Christmas day be if they all just sat around pretending it wasn't happening and not a single contraction and no baby appearing!

Most of the things peopleplease was complaining about in her original post weren't really to do with hosting Xmas, it was mostly her DH asking questions she couldn't possibly answer, if they want to host Xmas then why not!! Atleast her MIL will be on her side if she wants them to head home...

Thanks

Peopleplease · 13/12/2016 14:23

DH will be doing all the cooking with help from his parents. I will be sitting eating chocolate!

We have a 3 year old so couldn't cancel Christmas completely and somehow ended up with it happening in our house when I said I wouldn't want to go to PIL this year.

OP posts:

Thanks

Peopleplease · 13/12/2016 14:25

Plus I'm due on 23rd and I was 7 days over with DD1. Technically it could be the new year before I finally give birth!

OP posts:

Thanks

NapQueen · 13/12/2016 14:25

When I was in labour dh was saying "do you think you are nearly there?"

How the fuckedy fuck am I supposed to know?!?!?@?!?!

Thanks

MinesAGin · 13/12/2016 14:28

But I thought up to a week late for a first baby and up to a week early for a second was normal. That's what I was told when I had mine (and it was spookily accurate!)

Thanks

Nanananananagigglebiz · 13/12/2016 14:36

Tell him baby doesn't know when it's due date is. They come when they're ready! My first was due January and arrived Christmas day!
How annoying for you. Xx

Thanks

Hoppinggreen · 13/12/2016 14:42

I was due on 24th with pfb (12 years ago) and we told everyone to go away and leave us alone and IF we felt like joining anyone for Xmas day we would let them know.
She actually arrived on 23rd and I went home Xmas eve. DH cooked Xmas dinner for just the 2 of us ( first and last time ever) and it was lovely

Thanks

EvenTheWind · 13/12/2016 14:44

Term is between 37 and 42 weeks.

I didn't mean no Christmas exactly, but a low key day with less or no cooking, presents and tv, just immediate family.

Thanks

EvenTheWind · 13/12/2016 14:49

Just tell DH that whatever his personal worst case scenario, ie hormonal, I labour on the day, he can't go to work, BF is hard, he needs to be ready.

And many things will be harder this time as you have a 3 year old!

Thanks

MiddleClassProblem · 13/12/2016 14:51

DD's birthday is 23rd. My parents came to us but cooked and cleaned and looked after us. Christmas was a write off for me anyway as I couldn't eat or drink much and was wiped out. It was perfect as they did everything for us. They were staying so it washing, the lot! If they had come and we had to handle it then that would have been impossible. Fingers crossed they are thinking of doing most of the work for you.

Don't worry about whose type of Christmas it is, you'll get that back on track next year x

Thanks

MiddleClassProblem · 13/12/2016 14:55

Also you could just ask him dumb questions in return. "How often is your mum planning to pee whilst they stay here?", "what time does she usually have a cup of tea?", "will you dad be cold when he gets here?" "Will he get hotter later on?" (Although that sounds like a booze joke waiting to happen) "How many Brussels do they eat precisely?" Etc

Thanks

Peopleplease · 13/12/2016 15:36

middleclass I like that idea!

OP posts:

Thanks

oldlaundbooth · 13/12/2016 17:07

DH asked me last week what we are doing for New Year.

I'm due a cesarean on January 6th and we have a 3 year old and no chance of a baby sitter.

Not his brightest moment.

Feel your pain OP.

Thanks

Bella1985 · 13/12/2016 17:51

middleclass yes! Love those questions! I'm going to keep those up my sleeve for when people start asking me if I think I'll go on due date or not...especially 'How many times do you think you might pee on day xyz...?'

Thanks

Shemozzle · 15/12/2016 13:11

I feel your pain. I'm due Christmas Day. Dp keeps asking when I think I'm going to have the baby. He also keeps requesting I wait until Christmas Eve earliest as he can't afford to cancel all his booked work. Okay then.

We've given no invitations and accepted no invitations for Christmas. We've just told everyone we'll see what happens on the day, get some ready prepped Christmas food in and my mum has offered to bring us over some turkey or a full dinner or we are welcome to go to hers which is only a few miles away. No pressure. MIL said she is having a Boxing Day spread, I suggested OH go with 3 year old as I won't be up for traveling the 40 minutes there on my due date or with a newborn. Everyone agreed, and then MIL casually mentioned a few days ago she'd decided to visit us Christmas Day with her partner. She didn't even ask. I'm sure she only said it after we said we might go to my mums if baby isn't here. What is it with competing grandparents?

Thanks

Peopleplease · 15/12/2016 13:36

She couldn't you just reply sand tell her you won't be home?

OP posts:

Thanks

Radiatorvalves · 15/12/2016 13:46

I was due on 18th Dec with DS2. We had no plans for Xmas. PILs were going to drive over and help with DS1.... I assumed DS2 would be on time (as DS1 was) or early.

So I had a sweep on 18th, and, not much happened. He then arrived quickly on 22nd. I had no food in the house, but a friend bought me a beef joint. PILs came and went. And we had a quiet Xmas on our own. First and only one, but nice in its way!

Your plans (your DH's plans!) sound bonkers!!

Good luck!

Thanks

Flip

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.