Is it strange not to be enjoying this at all?

[Holly29]

Hello, I'm new here - I'm 8 weeks - and I'm feeling really bad because since I found out I was pregnant a few weeks ago it's all been pretty rubbish. I've had really bad cramps which wake me up every night, I feel totally exhausted and I feel sick all the time (have not actually been sick). feel obliged to keep up this show of 'oh its just fab being pregnant' to my lovely DH but I actually feel like I'm on a train which will eventually crash (i.e. it will only get worse!). Is this normal? Feel really ungrateful, as know how hard it is to get pregnant...

Thank god for this thread! Join the club Holly, but it seems to be a very secret one in real life! No-one else talks about how crap it is to be pg! I know some people love it but I really don't, and at times have too wished to not be pregnant (I know that sounds awful).
I'm so sick of everyone telling me how wonderful it is to be pregnant, and aren't I so excited? No I'm bloody not, I feel like crap, my morning sickness has suddenly returned at 21 weeks (WTF!), I'm constantly tired and in pain from ligaments and stretching, and I look like a tellytubby so excuse me if NO I don't find it wonderful or exciting!
Sorry, sorry, you'll see I do this every now and again, just have to vent!
I really hope you feel better soon Holly, but don't feel bad about the way you feel, it's something that lots of people feel but few people talk about. Thank god for mumsnet!

Holly - congrats on your pg. My dd is 13 months now, but I too felt completely abnormal in not enjoying my pregnancy. I had no reason to complain, I wasn't sick and had a problem-free pg, but just didn't enjoy being pg. It took until I was 6 months pg to 'get into it' and enjoy my changing body. I love my dd to bits and was thrilled to be expecting her, but couldn't wait to give birth! Don't worry - the sickness and fatigue WILL pass, and you can then concentrate on looking forward and preparing for your baby. Good Luck

Ladies

I only joined Mumsnet yesterday and I want to say how much it has helped me already! It is one of these taboos isn't it - not enjoying your pregnancy - society somehow idealises the whole thing, so you feel like you should be 'glowing' and enjoying every moment. Thank you so much for all your caring and helpful replies. I don't feel alone now!

ditto what others have said - I hated being pregnant too but I adore being a mummy. And the newborn days were a doddle compared to what I went through with the pregnancy so it felt like a relief. All the best and hope you feel much better soon.

Hi, I too am 8 weeks pregnant. This is my 3rd baby. My previous 2 are 10 yrs and 7 years!!! I have wanted to have another baby for several years but my husband was adamant he didn't. In November he was knocked off his motorbike in a hit and run incident, he suffered severe injuries, including being left with a completely paralysed arm. Very very lucky to still be here. The accident made him rethink about what was important and he said if I still wanted to we could have another baby. Wow, what a fantastic thing to come out of such an awful time in our lives. Amazingly I fell pregnant straight away.

The past few weeks I have been feeling anything but happy. I feel like there is a dark cloud hanging above my head. Can't seem to snap out of it. I also have this overwhelming fear that I am going to miscarry, I find myself checking everyday to see if I am bleeding, sometimes (VERY occasionally) find the lightest pink discharge, sorry if TMI. Got tummy cramps, and tiredness, all symptoms I had when had other two.

Had a scan on Monday and saw heartbeat, they're going to re-scan on the 27th because they picked up an odd shadow on the back of the yolk sac. They said this was no cause for concern.

I think with everything we've been through over the past few months, I'm feeling a bit emotionally drained/flat with worrying about this pregnancy.

Sorry such a long one. I'm new here!

wow, so glad am not the only one!!!
I seem to have lots of friends in late 30 s early forties and have been trying for years so I NEVER feel i can complain, I do look forward to being a mum but this is rubbish so far...... and YES people feel they can tell you how you're supposed to be feeling and that it's good if you feel sick as that means your hormones working !!!???
I keep waiting for the blooming bit - 20 wks so far-Nothing! huge thanks to all on this thread, brightened my grey sickly afternoon to know I 'm not alone, YES mnet IS great, a real/virtual circle of friendly support.
Peace xx

I've just had my 4th baby and absolutley hated being PG this time.
With the first 3 I loved it and was always sad to not be PG anymore once I'd had the baby.
I couldn't even look at materneuity clothes in catelogues without wanting to cry...that how much I loved being PG.

DS4 is almost 4 weeks old and the thought of ever being Pg again fills me with utter dread, I hated being PG this time, everything was hard work. It seemed like one big long hard slog.

I'd have new born again, no problem. I'd have 10 newborns again but to be PG again....NO WAY !!

I cried every night between 8 weeks and 11 weeks as the thought of waking up the next morning and feeling as bad as I did again was just overwhelming! All day sickness (never sick just felt sick) No energy and feeling very low in mood.
I hated the first trimester SO SO much... Im happy to say that im now 15+6 and feel GREAT (grin)
My energy is through the roof, I feel lovely and fluffy and very excited.

I'm pregnant with my second child now and I hated being pregnant first time and I hate it this time too! Totally agree with Weegle that actually having the baby was easier for me than the reality of being pregnant! I hate not being able to eat what I want, I hate my changing body (feel lardy rather than pregnant) the vomiting, back pain, sciatica, spd and general feeling of exhaustion just brings me down. My husband and I would love to have more kids after this one, but part of me doesn't want to just because I would have to endure the misery of feeling like sh*t again for another 9 months! If only men could carry them....

I think the guilt at being a miserable pregnant lady is normal too.

Oh and mytwocents - I didn't get the blooming thing first time and I'm now 23 weeks and am definitely not bloooming yet either - maybe it's just a myth!!

Just wanted to add my name to the list really!

My first trimester I hated. I had really bad nausea and vomiting, and was absolutely exhausted all of the time, and had really bad headaches bordering on migranes. Add that to really long hours in work and a commute of over an hour each way... also because this is my first (and I didn't discover MN until about 20 weeks!) I panicked constantly. Every single (normal) pgcy symptom was to my mind a sign that something was going to go wrong!

Second trimester, the one where you're supposed to bloom, I didn't bloom one bit, was still tired, still feeling nauseous (not actually sick though) and dh started to lose patience a bit too (because I'd been going on about how nice it would be in the second trimester when all the books said I'd bloom and get my energy back).

Strangely enough, now I'm in my third trimester, I finally feel a bit happier with being pg. The only thing (you can tell from my name) that gets me down is being bored with waiting, I feel ready for him to come out now! I still get morning sickness but not nearly as bad, I'm still tired, but I think the thing that's made the real difference is that now, the chances of something going wrong are quite slim, and you can finally let yourself get excited about meeting your lo.