45, last chance baby & bleeding!

[GFrog]

Just going out of my mind! Am newly pregnant aged 45 and have children from 13-29 but my pregnancy is very muchbwanted after three miscarriages between 2011-2013 and avoiding close encounters for 3 years, I fell pg at 'first sight' of my DH when we had a special cuddle and knew the next day.
Just been to the loo and I'm bleeding. Seemed a bit as were bits in it but wiped myself until just a speck. No cramps or anything. Now I've got to try and sleep hoping it stops and our baby can thrive. Too early to go to hospital so I've just metaphorically got to 'go with the flow' but I'm scared. Can't bear the thought of losing another as my last loss in 2013 was horrendous as I got an infection and was ill for ages. Felt so blessed to conceive this one but to think it may be gone/going is hell. I doubt I can do it to myself again. I'm old enough to be a Gran. Just hoped and dreamt that it was meant to be... now I'm not so sure :(

Oh love, so sorry you are having this happen to you.
I hope you manage some sleep but most of all I hope everything will be ok with this little love.
xx

Is this how your previous miscarriages started? My EPU was only office hours which was shite when miscarriages started in a Friday evening :(
Hope it's not mc

If it's any consolation I had a fair bit of bleeding with my DD as I had a clot in the uterus that was shrinking as the baby was growing. It's quite common so push for a scan.

I had A scan At 4w 7w and 11w and they all put my mind At rest

Won't be able to get a scan until after the weekend which is horrendous but they're only open Mon - Fri at the EPAU. Bub will likely be gone by then and yes my previous miscarriages started like this. I have been so happy even though I've been eating my way through everything savoury in the house since conception. Lying in bed with my legs up... not as it'll make one iota of difference.

Meant to say thanks. Just want a cuddle but my DH has just fell apart when I need him most :(

Oh it really is soul destroying.

Had a horrendous night, I think my Bub has been rejected at the speed of it's making! Forgotten I could lose so much fresh red blood and to note it's 'only the size of a lentil' so was likely gone at the beginning when it was bitty rather than the fresh blood pouring out of me. TMI? Sorry to be graphic. I'm absolutely devastated. Not feeling crampy but feel uncomfortable on my left tube so hoping it's nothing worse but after a night of being sleep deprived, all sorts is going around my head... To make matters worse I'm expecting a delivery from argos direct this morning as I decided midweek to start stocking up on baby stuff but hopefully can be returned ok

Sorry to hear about your history and potentially what you are going through. You haven't advised how far you think you are along - please be wary of pains etc that may signify an ectopic.

What I would say is however difficult or lonely it is, try not to expect your DH to react the same way you have. He may close himself off as although physically you are dealing with it, he is still dealing with it. When we lost our baby my husband barely spoke, closed in on himself and yes he was there for cuddles etc when I asked but months later he explained that he had no control. Every time I went to the toilet, he was waiting with baited breath for me to come out with an update.

Fingers crossed - as blood isn't always a bad sign. take care of yourself (and each other)

Thanks, I was only 6 weeks ish. I was updating my husband at loo time too. There can't be anything left but I will take note of this 'left tube' niggle and hope it goes away. I'd hate an ectopic and will go and read up so I know what not to ignore.
I still want to throw up but my boobs aren't as crazy. Less than 24 hours ago I was over the moon and now at rock bottom, slept most of the day between the extended loo visits. I'm just physically and emotionally wrecked.
Love to all MN's and thanks for your messages at this bleak time.