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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

BMI Shock

63 replies

RachaelLaurenDaisyStone · 09/07/2016 21:15

Hi, I've suffered with anorexia since preteens and I had got myself to a healthy weight and BMI of 18.5 (8stone 3lbs at 5'5) when I'd conceived. I had panicked about the weight gain obviously throughout pregnancy but my pysc midwife had always reasured me that BMI calculations during pregnancy weren't reliable / used and that for low weight at conception I should expect to gain more weight than most, but that everyone gains what they gain and ya-da-yarda. I have maintained my meal plans and healthy eating throughout. Stayed at the gym, and I'm a waitress/ nursery teacher so I've been very active throughout my pregnancy. My husband kept the scales from me and I have seen a weight gain in my thighs and face and arms but had been coping. ANYWAY there's the back story! So I saw a new midwife as I've moved areas and she had to re-weigh me etc etc. she has classed me on my notes as obese. And a risk for anesthetic! I am so devastated and confused?! The NHS website says mothers with a BMI of 30+ BEFORE pregnancy are counted as obese. Just don't know what to do. But Then it says but even a 1-2 point gain in your BMI can cause complications in birth like the shoulders getting stuck and excess bleeding. But then it says there is no defined weight gain for during pregnancy. Then all the guidelines are about healthy eating and getting 30 mins a week excercise. But like I said I meal plan every meal, I go to the gym at least every other day. Which I have done the whole pregnancy?! I just don't know there doesn't seem to be any consistent answers!!! I had a full on panick attack and I just don't know how I'm going to eat anything?! Please can someone give me some advice?!

OP posts:
MilicentKing · 10/07/2016 14:51

I can understand that you may have difficultly having a general idea of what you weigh at this time, but your MW really should be able to tell by looking at you whether you are 14 stone. Sounds like she has no common sense.

Happygojo86 · 10/07/2016 15:28

The only thing I can think of is you might be really toned? But I still think 90kg is a real stretch unless you are like 6ft. Please do not worry. You look in fantastic shape, please don't let this change what you are doing. My BMI was 36 when I gave birth (I'm a fatty mc fatty generally) and I had a water birth with no complications.....MW really need to look at the whole person..... Although I still think this is an error xxxx

dementedpixie · 10/07/2016 15:38

I was nearly 16 stone before both of pregnancies and put on about 1 stone in each. Had 2 normal births although was borderline for gestational diabetes in my first pregnancy but no sign of it in my second.

Scarydinosaurs · 10/07/2016 15:49

Can you email ABC the eating disorder support charity? They were life savers for me during my first pregnancy. They will be able to reply to you by tomorrow with some helpful practical guidance.

Please, as hard as it will be, re-weigh yourself as the midwife has misreported that figure.

pollylovespie · 10/07/2016 15:50

There's no way at your height that you weigh 14 stone. It must have been a mistake. You know you're not obese, we can all see you're not and you are fitting into a small size. By far the most likely explanation is that your (pretty useless by the sound of it) midwife misread the scales. I was 14 stone at the end of my pregnancy and I can assure you I was A LOT bigger than you!

CelticPromise · 10/07/2016 16:15

If you didn't want to be weighed she shouldn't have weighed you. We weight at the end of pregnancy but just for stats, we don't use it to calculate bmi. It isn't accurate when you are heavily pregnant. I would go by your pre pregnancy bmi unless you had gained a big excessive amount.

gamerchick · 10/07/2016 16:24

I hate to suggest it given your history by maybe you should weigh yourself again. I really don't think you're 14 stone from what you've said or your pictures. I went up to 12 stone in pregnancy and I was certainly not fitting into size 10s.

Can your bloke get the scales out and weigh you to put your mind at rest?

Northernlurker · 10/07/2016 16:31

I think your midwife needs to consider her practice very carefully. Please try and see a new psych midwife urgently.

Original poster
RachaelLaurenDaisyStone · 10/07/2016 16:32

Thanks everyone. I emailed the ABC Scarydinosaurs thanks for the suggestion. I am to terrified to weigh myself If she is right or worse I'm even heavier. I'm just so upset. I feel like a failure and that I have put my baby at risk of a complicated birth. 😢 X

OP posts:
IveGotCheese · 10/07/2016 16:32

I'm 5'5 and I weigh 13 stone and I'm not pregnant and I am much bigger than you! I would suggest you weigh yourself because there is no way you are 14 stone.

neonrainbow · 10/07/2016 16:37

You look great. There's no way you're obese.

Scarydinosaurs · 10/07/2016 16:43

Rach honestly, I could have written your post a million times in both of my pregnancies. It is a normal reaction to pregnancy when you have a history of eating disorders, and has been exacerbated by your MW taking the wrong weight measurement.

It will be fine. You look brilliant, you've worked hard at providing nutrious food for your baby, and exercised and kept fit. That's great! Do not now hurt the most important part of you- your mind. As hard as it will be, I imagine you will be advised to re-weigh, as that is the only way to clear up the misunderstanding. I'm so so sorry you're going through this. Please PM me if you want to talk more, I do completely understand.

HumphreyCobblers · 10/07/2016 16:45

Goodness. I was literally three times the width of you when pg and I didn't weigh 14 stone. Really she has made an error. Given your history she has made an inexcusable error.

I would be brave and weigh yourself, I expect you will be happy with the result.

WellErrr · 10/07/2016 16:46

There is no WAY you are 14 stone with a BMI of over 30 and obese. No way.

The midwife has made a mistake. She should not have weighed you anyway - I've never been weighed after booking in.

isthistoonosy · 10/07/2016 16:46

Would it help to measure yourself - thighs, arms etc so you see you haven't changed as much as you fear you have?

Landoni112 · 10/07/2016 16:49

Could you ask your dp to re-weigh you in a way you don't see the result, so you don't have to look at the scales? You could then decide whether you wanted to know or not and you have his support?

PrincessHairyMclary · 10/07/2016 16:52

You look wonderful and healthy.

I think the scales were set wrong, pounds instead of stone and probably read 140lbs and she read it as 14.0 stone.

sepa · 10/07/2016 17:28

No way are you obese. You look fantastic. You look pregnant not a maybe pregnant. Get your DP to weigh you and try not looking

SaraC8 · 10/07/2016 17:31

Going from those pics you can't be, I'm about 14.5 stone (the same as when I got pregnant, lost a bit from sickness and have just put it back on now), and I'm nearly 27 weeks. I'm a size 16/18 and 5'3. I wouldn't get one leg in a size 10 Grin You look great and think she's definately made a mistake. Which is not great considering your history Sad I had to see a consultant as my bmi was high but I saw her and she put me straight back on midwife led care as she was happy I was fine. Please don't worry about it (easier said than done) xx

PinkyPlumet · 10/07/2016 17:34

Op you look amazing!

And there no way your a bmi 33.

KayTee87 · 10/07/2016 19:08

Bmi is not accurate in pregnancy and it's ridiculous that she would even mention it. I was weighed at my 36 week appointment (first time since booking) and she made absolutely no comment at all about bmi. Your mw made a major error mentioning your bmi especially with your history of eating disorder.

Dixiechick17 · 10/07/2016 19:12

Honestly you look great!! As said, I put on four stone. I gave birth on the Midwife led unit with no complications. I know how awful it is to be weighed in this situation, I weighed myself at the end stupidly and freaked out. Please ask to see another Midwife who I have no doubt will alleviate your worries from looking at you. You've got a lovely neat bump and don't look big at all. I struggled to enjoy my pregnancy because of my increasing size, in the first month though my DD was such a distraction that by the time I thought to weigh myself most of it had come off x

VimFuego101 · 10/07/2016 19:20

I think there's been a mistake, you look nowhere near that weight. I was probably around that weight at the end of my pregnancy, am 4 inches taller than you and was literally twice your size.

VimFuego101 · 10/07/2016 19:21

Yes, 140lbs sounds far more likely Princess

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 10/07/2016 19:34

I think that this might be a case of box ticking over common sense. I am sure you won't have put your baby at risk. It sounds like you have done amazingly to deal with the pregnancy weight gain with your history of anorexia. It can be hard to cope with without any food issues! But you have done so well to eat healthily and nourish your baby OP Flowers

Can you ask to see a different midwife in the future?