Furious with Midwife

[FloLarkin]

I have seen my MW once (am 22 weeks) when she booked me in and she asked what kind of birth I wanted.
We had a long talk about my preference for home birth or MLU birth but my fear of a hospital birth and how I'd like to avoid it at all costs.
I was referred to a consultant as its my first baby and my mum MAY have had pre-eclampsia symptoms with her first birth (this is highly unlikely due to the surrounding circs)
My BP has always been perfect and I'm a healthy weight and in my 20s so whilst I know it can happen to anyone, it's nothing to worry about. MW confirmed this and said home birth would still be very much encouraged in my case (we are 5 mins from hospital)

Now I see she has written in my notes that my planned place of birth is the labour ward with consultant led care!! WTF?! Has anyone else had this? Can you make them change it?
She's also ticked that we've discussed breastfeeding - we haven't at all!!
It's really made me panic and not trust her...

The consultant referral must be either a mistake, or about something else. I can't believe that possible pre-eclampsia in the OPs mum is enough.

I hope the midwife phones you back and you can get a clear answer about why you've been referred.

Also, about the breastfeeding, the midwives really aren't experts and none of the ones that I saw ever explained anything about it, apart from very minimal things post-delivery. I had much more info from NCT classes and from my doula. As much as the NHS wants to promote breastfeeding, they are really not geared up to actually support it.

Yeah, my MWs were useless last time in giving breastfeeding advice. In my appointments the extent of the conversation was them saying that breast is best and asking if I was planning on breastfeeding, and then postnatally they basically said "well, give it a go then?" When I said I wanted to BF. To be fair, the NHS run antenatal class was pretty good though, we spent an afternoon talking about it.

It can be a standard thing I've been booked in for a Homebirth since my booking appointment. At 36weeks the midwife noticed the ultrasound techs had messed up and noticed I should of been seeing a consultant (prior sga baby) so now I have a massive consultant sticker on my notes his more than happy for me to go ahead with my planned Homebirth I have one more appointment with him before my due date to have another scan purely to see if this baby with be sga. This is my third child and will be second Homebirth.

I found the NHS breastfeeding support to be excellent - I went to a dedicated antenatal class on it and the hospital midwives were brilliant. When I had trouble after I got home I had daily midwife visits helping me and I was referred to the breastfeeding specialist within the HV team. Couldn't have asked for more really. But it wasn't part of my routine antenatal care.

I think the problem is that breastfeeding support is not the same across the country. My DS1 was born in 2012 so maybe things have improved since then, but there was no specific NHS class offered about breastfeeding. I had a lot of issues with breastfeeding and had no specialist support offered to me from the midwives or HV. All they ever suggested was more formula top ups. I resolved the issues myself and the HV expressed surprise that I had managed to! It seems slightly better so far this time round, as there is a breastfeeding workshop advertised on my maternity notes, although the midwives have not actually mentioned this to me verbally!

Ah, it obviously varies Speak - as DD1 was born in 2012 as well and that's when I went to the NHS run breastfeeding workshop before I had her!

Postnatally the support did seem poor though, and luckily I didn't have to access any because I suspect I'd have run into the same failings as you did.

I was told the consultant referral is as a result of ticking two or more boxes on a risk checklist - 1 being the fact that it's my first pregnancy and 2 being that my mum may have had pre eclampsia. I think it's ridiculous personally and hopefully the consultant agrees

I can't get over your friend being made to push when she wasn't even 2cm dilated! What planet was that midwife on?! I hope she made a formal complaint.

SpeakNoWords - I also gave birth in 2012 and had the whole formula top ups thing! So annoying! I ignored the advice and DS did brilliantly and my milk came in well.

If that's the case flo you will have one appointment with the consultant and then be signed back to the midwives to hopefully have the birth you want. I only say hopefully as so many factors can change it, like being induced. Out of the seven women on my NCT course only one got the midwife led unit birth they wanted and that was me, two were induced, one was preemie, two c section and one couldn't get onto MLU as there was no room.

I was a healthy 28 yr old, excellent bmi, active and fit. I became pregnant in 2008 and told them my mum had pre eclampsia with my older sister and myself. My sister was born 4 weeks early and I was 2 weeks but growth restricted at only 4 lbs. My mum was incredibly ill and hospitalised prior to classic c sections. There was no trigger points made on my notes and it wasn't policy to generate me as high risk. I went on to develop early onset, severe pre eclampsiacomplicated with hellp syndrome. I delivered my son by emergency c section critically I'll with liver, kidney failure and my platelets crashed. I was at risk.from Fitting and a stroke my blood pressure was over 200/140. I delivered a small for dates, pre term critically ill baby who had a very tough time in intensive care
The new protocol so are there to protect women like me who had a family connection with pre eclampsia. I pregnant again now, over 7 years later and on aspirin to help prevent it reoccurring. You might be suggested to take it too. I have a friend who is pregnant now, with a similar family history to you. She complained that she had to have an extra appointment with a consultant and take aspirin. I told her I wished that it had been protocol when I was pregnant the first time. I sincerely hope that you don't develop pre eclampsia, and that for you its an inconvenience to have your initial consultant appointment and to.take aspirin. I hope you get your birth and delivery you want and pre eclampsia is just a risk box ticked on your notes, not a event that you have to experience. But please don't presume that the health care professionals are over reacting to the possible risks.

Autumn I think the crucial difference is that your mum was actually ill with pre eclampsia - mine wasn't.

My mum was a first time birth in an horrendous domestic abuse/violence situation at the age of 19 - she was totally isolated from her whole family and was terrified of going into hospital - as a result her BP was erratic throughout the pregnancy.

At the time they were not supportive of home births in her area at all so the midwives all tried to pressure her into a hospital birth.

She was 2 weeks over due and everything was normal and healthy with both her and the baby including her BP but the midwife wanted to induce, so checked my mums ankles and said they were puffy, therefore she had to go in as could be pre eclampsia and could be very dangerous. Nothing else was puffy and her ankles only very slightly.

She then had a completely straight forward induction and labour - no complications due to supposed pre eclampsia at all. Her BP was actually high after the birth once my abusive father and his family took over - again, nothing to do with pre eclampsia.

My mum then had a perfectly healthy labour and birth with me two years later.

Trust me I know exactly how risky it can be - I think you've taken my post very personally and assumed that I know nothing about any risks, which is not the case.

Is there any reason why you can't write an entry under hers reflecting what was actually discussed and noting your preferences. Raise it next time and check the notes before you leave.

Unfortunately ime midwives don't listen and don't accurately record. Exactly why I requested consultant led care with my last baby. It was much better organised and I felt properly listened to by someone who was bright enough to fully answer questions. The consultant made me feel much safer.

Beaufort I've noted that it's not preferred/wasn't discussed under her entries - so will raise with the consultant.

Mine ticked all sorts of boxes saying things were discussed, they never were. Common practice probablg

My apologies to the op, I hadn't fully understood the background to your mother's story and had presumed that you meant she had a mild case of pre eclampsia or pregnancy induced hypertension. I just wanted to highlight that even if your mother had a mild case, or late onset, that doesn't require treatment, my case proves that you can get it earlier and more severe. You are right I do take it personally because I feel so strongly about educating other mums to be. It's a very scary condition. Again, sorry for jumping in on your post. I hope that my experience will help other people reading though to understand why health professionals take family history so seriously.
Good luck with your pregnancy I hope you can build some confidence in with your next mw.appt.