Reassurance for second labour

[Natalie8585]

Hi
This is just a quick post to reassure any second time mums who like me had a traumatic first labour (well more traumatic aftermath) and are worried about whether it will happen again.
I had a long first labour, back to back, 3.5 hours pushing stage and ultimately theatre for vontousse (?) and forceps delivery which meant a tear and an episiotomy. I had an infection afterwards (not to mention the prolapse) and was quite poorly and it really spoiled my experience. I remember thinking I would do labour again rather tHan have the pain down below much longer! My son was also taken to neo natal and all in all it just wasn't how I imagined. Despite my son being absolutely beautiful obviously (!) Friends had had glorious labour experiences and warm glows afterwards and I was just in agony. Was in hospital a week and tbh was probably in shock for a good couple of weeks after! I then got pregnant just four months later! After 4 years of trying to conceive I ultimately only had 4 months between pregnancies! Quite ironic!!!
I was very worried my labour would be riddled with the same problems, particularly worried about tearing or being cut again. (One midwife who examined me the day I went into my second labour commented she had never seen such a big episiotomy scar!!!) I also went Overdue again, only 11 days as opposed to the 13 days over in my first (highly recommend reflexology to help with this but that's another story!)
With my second labour I had mild contractions at 5pm and went to hospital for about 10, was examined at 11 and told was only 3cm, so disappointed, but I took two paracetamol and had a bath and was examined again at 1 am and was fully dilated. Pushed my beautiful second boy out at 215! No time for pain relief but wow what a magical experience. No tears just a couple of grazes. I was on an instant high which lasted for days and all in all was a much more positive experience. I love my two boys equally and bonding with them both was just the same, I wasn't adversely impacted in that regard by my first labour. But my point is, things can really be very very different with ur second labour and I took a lot of comfort from this site when I was worrying in the middle of heavily pregnant sleepless nights and I just wanted to share my story in hope it will reassure any expectant mums who are in similar position to what I was in xxx

Thank you that's helped me! I had emergency forceps with dd after 23 hour back to back! Episiotomy and also 3 unit blood transfusion over 4 days I hospital! I am already worrying about this one! 33 weeks fingers crossed it goes ok!

Thanks for the reassurance, I'm so worried shitting myself due to frantic, rushed, traumatic first labour... Episiotomy and threatened forceps, back to back etc... Hope mine is as positive as yours sounds.. Xxx

fingers crossed for you both and good luck xxx I probably am looking back on it with rose tinted glasses (9 weeks on now!) but I just had this overwhelming high I didn't have first time, and I'm not a particularly emotional person In that way (well not at all really!) but defo second time I got the wave of hormones which made me feel a lot happier than first time around X and honest to god, I have seen downstairs (cringe) and would have bet my house that my scar tissue would have gone (tmi) but I guess second time around ur body knows what to do a little more ;-)

Im another one who had a bad first labour and a wonderful second.

Dc1 - in labour at 4am, 3mins between cxns, went in, only 2cm, went to send me home and I had three cxns in a row so they kept me in. Awful long labour, ended up on diamorphene, sytocin and evebtually prepped for a csec. Taken to theatre and dd delivered by forceps at 4am. Had an epidural and episiotomy.

Dc2 - into labour at 6.30am, cxns 3mins apart, into hospital at 8.30am, 2cms. She gave me a sweep. Re examined at 10am, 7cms. Ds born at 10.20am, with me bent up and over the back of the hospital bed with some G&A and an amazing trainee with the roughest palms rubbing my back. I pushed twice.

DD1 - compound presentation which resulted in a 3a tear. Delivered her on gas and air and then had to have a spinal and be in theatre for the repair.

DD2 - relatively long time with contractions but hit transition at 8.50am (begged for an epidural but was 8cm so said 'bugger it, I'll do it myself), waters went at 9.17, three surges and DD2 arrived at 9.21! Had no hand act or part in it at all.

Was amazing.

Thanks so much. I could almost have written an identical account for horrendous first birth (or the immediate aftermath).. 17 days late, episiotomy, surgery, then baby in SCBU and over a week in hospital. I am now 29 weeks with no.2, conceived when DS was 4 months!! I have been freaking out about going through birth again. It's very helpful and reassuring to read your positive experiences

LOVE this story, thanks for sharing!

Thank you SO much for sharing this! I'm 33wks with DC2 after unpleasant first labour ending in suction and forceps, massive episiotomy and slight prolapse. Have been starting to get worried about this labour and whether I should go for birth centre again or push for elcs... You've all given me faith that it might be ok!!! THANK YOU!

Yup - hideous near-death experience in first labour, simple pain relief-free love buzz of a second go.

On number three now - it had better go like the second time 😉

Gosh OP, I'm surprised you were recovered enough to get pregnant 4months after the first one. Hats off to you. I too had a traumatic first birth (7weeks ago) it was so awful that even if we could dtd at the moment (can't due to stitches etc) I couldn't due to the emotional trauma and my abject fear of getting pregnant again.

How funny so many similar stories, I have to be honest it was a massive shock getting pregnant again, (shouldn't be really I do understand the birds and bees!) just naively thought it wouldn't happen, we ttc with our first for so long and actually got caught literally a month before the final part of fertility treatment, I think the hysteroscopy (?) and other similar things just must have sorted me out! But never thought would happen to me so quickly!!!! It still feels unreal now!!!! I hope that all your second labours go well xxx

Ps junosmum absolutely take ur time with dtd, I think it was 9 weeks for us after the first but I will be honest I had to have a few wines ;-) and was so paranoid about it all! I was in too much pain down there to have even done a couple of pelvic floors (tmi sorry!) it will get better though I promise X

StormTr00per I bet u r having so many people say to u how hard it will be with two so close but it's surprising how many people have children so close together and whilst it has its moments (normally at breakfast time!!) the positives way outweigh the challenges (and I'm quite a realist/pessimist!!) ha ha X plus all the sleepless nights, nappies etc is all out the way in one big hit ;-)