Strain yourself or push at the time of contraction and two hours later a baby will come out

[PartridgeinaRustyBearTree]

DS got a book for Christmas called the World's stupidest Instructions - it includes these from a pregnancy clinic in Japan:

Strain yourself or push at the time of contraction and two hours later a baby will come out

A swell will be checked if there is, by pushing shin

If your weight gains rapidly it is a sign of swell or fatness

If you pick out your nipple come out 1cm high, and it'll be alright

You'd better begin your sexual intercourse after the delivery after the one mouth check up with the doctor

After you vomit, you rinse your mouse and if you can eat, eat

You can do Ufoo, foo naturally when you open your mouth slightly

Brasure can be for maternity one or nursing bra so that your breast can't be oppressed

There are many differences of ideas in family but she felt family bondage after delivery as a wife

Don't quite know what comments you want..??!!! The book sounds bizarre imo.

things get lost on translation, in japanese it probably makes perfect sense

Message withdrawn

It does illustrate what my sister (who's a professional translator) always says - you should never translate out of your native language, only into it. They should have got an English speaking translator.

However, even with no translation problems it can go wrong. These were instructions on a condom vending machine in England

Insert coin

Select product

Pull knob out fully

LOL rusty,...post it again in the bar after christmas!!

ufoo foo!