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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Lonley and pregnant

9 replies

Mumtobe2016 · 28/12/2015 20:47

Hi. Not even sure if this is the right place go do this, let me know if it's not.
I'm 6 months pregnant and feeling very lonley. I got married 8 weeks ago. My mum passed 10 years ago and my nan passed away last year. I was brought up by my grandparents. Me and my husband moved in with my grandad last year to take care of him. I don't speak to my 2 sisters. I go to work but don't have anyone particularly close. I have friends but not very close ones. When I have an argument with my husband I feel so alone and scared. Things have been tough he's been out of work 5 months so all the pressure is on me at the moment. Basically I want to know if I am being selfish for feeling so lonley? Thanks

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Junosmum · 28/12/2015 21:21

Totally the right place and you aren't being selfish. We all need some friends and support outside of our family/ relationship.

Do you have any hobbies or do any activities which could lead to a group or get together?

Where in the country are you? Have you tried 'meetup' or a local facebook group? Where I live there's a facebook group for local parents/ parents to be and they have meet ups.

Are you doing any parenting classes? you'll meet other people there.

In the mean time there is always on here!

maybebabybee · 28/12/2015 21:26

Bless you. You are absolutely not being selfish. Pregnancy can be a scary lonely time even when you have loads of people around you. In your situation it must be very difficult.

Is your relationship OK apart from financial pressures?

Whenwillwe3meetagain · 28/12/2015 21:27

Id really recommend doing a pregnancy class if possible. Be the one who sets up a whatsapp
Group afterwards. Was brilliant for me.

oneconfusedchick · 28/12/2015 21:28

Hey - I don't have much to say but I didn't want you to read and run. It must be very hard without your mum and nan. I live far away from friends and where I grew up and it can get quite lonely especially being pregnant. I hope you find some people who you can relate to on here. You might also want to think about looking/posting in the relationships thread as I think these sort of topics can come up there.

I do not have really any close friends now but I have found friends through going to baby groups - I use netmums and google ones on my area. I also work part time (not at mo tho as on maternity leave) which keeps me feeling a little connected after have a kid.

I think people (esp those without kids) expect pregnancy and motherhood to be blissful and amazing. Personally I found pregnancy lonely and I do struggle to look after my toddler (baby groups and having plans to do these groups does help take up the time).

Def keep posting on here though - if anything just to vent! xx

NerrSnerr · 28/12/2015 21:45

Do you have a Children's Centre nearby? I had an awful pregnancy and moved house at the same time so knew no one. When I was heavily pregnant I just walked in and asked about groups, I told them I was having a rough time and they offered so much support. I couldn't have got through without them and I am really good friends with people I have met in those groups.

Mumtobe2016 · 28/12/2015 21:50

Thanks everyone for replying.
Things are ok. My husband helps with cooking, cleaning etc but don't think he really gets that I am lonely.
He says it's an insult that I am lonley when he is there. After any argument he tells me our marriage won't work, which makes me feel even worse as I work and cannot bring up a child alone with no one.
Maybe I shouldn't have decided to start a family, I tried to avoid it due to my bad child hood and didn't want the same things repeting themselves. .. I have tried so hard to avoid it. I am so blessed at the same time. Just very confused. Thanks everyone.
I am starting yogabellies on 20th Jan once a week so il get to meet other pregnant mums.. hopefully that will help me
Thanks

OP posts:
Mumtobe2016 · 28/12/2015 21:56

What is a children's centre? Thanks

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Gingergen2013 · 28/12/2015 22:54

Children's centres are a local resource set up by the government offering help and advice for families, run cheap playgroups, courses - they're a fabulous resource if you have one nearby. Search Sure Start Children's Centre on the web and it'll help you find one local to you. I felt very lonely when I had my DS, and the groups these centres run were great for getting out of the house and meeting other Mums!

Mumtobe2016 · 29/12/2015 13:09

thanks, i have got some details for a local sure start

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